CollateralElement (Offline)

I sent you my number?

I'll tell you tomorrow! It's been... a journey!

Erm no, I don't want to share a bed with another bloke for 9 months thanks.

Oh that's a shame. Hopefully you'll sort something soon!

Clothes, maybe a wallet or something. Lunch. Whatever takes my fancy! It's London, who knows what could happen! I need to pop to the tailors and drop of my jacket to be altered a bit, which should be rather amusing. Why, did you have something you needed to buy?

Just a day pass, nothing special! You'll get one cheaper with an Oyster card! I need one of those things!

Santa... true. Im booked to visit the old chap at Harrods in December, can't wait!

Awww. It looks so stylish, too, I might add.

Aww don't worry, at least it's a single room, right? I have a god forsaken twin... for a delightful £110 a week! How comes it's temporary? Aren't you in a hall of residence?

Well yeah, I actually get to London at about 11am! I'll be at Kings Cross but I intend to buy a zone1-2 tube pass so I can move around and do what I need to do! I was hoping to go shopping! Haha sure I'll message you it! Please would have been nice though!

A doll, huh? Meh, it'll do! And perhaps for you, m'dear, but I'm more than satisfied by that glorious voice of his.

Well the ones who aren't fat, silly - nobody who's old and fat looks good in anything!

Yeah. In Knightsbridge. Even get breakfast - for free! Umad?

Well, if you say so! Still it seems rather odd to me! At least you're done with it!

Have a great time moving in! As it so happens I'm free after lunchtime tomorrow? Otherwise there's a pretty long waiting list!

Ok tiger!

Why not? You did before! Don't go all self-conscious on me! Well not necessarily his looks, but his voice is gives me an eargasm! I'm your man, then.

Bankers wear sharply cut, tailored, suits, not monocles, my good lady! But indeed, I cannot stand "regional accents"! Ugh!

Aww, I do have a lovely hotel room in Knightsbridge, shame you'll miss out!

Oh, honey! I wouldn't ignore you! I couldn't! I hate ignoring people even more than being the last one to reply!

Your work appears very tedious, indeed! Why are you doing dissertations for people? I don't understand...? Why don't they do it themselves? Don't be bullied into it! Show they how ferocious you Omani women are!

And yes, I would edit it out, as it might get flagged up for plagiarism otherwise m'dear!

1) No worries, few people do! Investment banking. Interesting work (playing with other people's money... what could possibly go wrong!? ), interesting colleagues, high profile clients, big salaries, and a bonus proportional to how much work you get done. Cannot emphasise how much I love the italicised!

2) You have remarkable English, don't be silly! Well at least now you can spot a new species of animal: "hey, look, a heard of sheeple!" I see what you did there!

3) Indeed. I myself wasn't quite sure what message it implied, but it was too funny to change it once I'd seen it! Haha well how odd, you claimed earlier in our conversations to be the hottest thing in the world, or words to that effect! Is it chimp or chick? Make up your mind, sweetie!

4) Ooooh it sounds like quite the cocktail. British meaning 'posh' or 'cockney' or 'geordie' or what? There is no such thing as a "British accent"! (Though I do wish everyone sounded like Hugh Grant - listening to his voice is like audial sex. Yeah, I said it. ) Alas, no top-hat; though a nice fitted waistcoat is in fact a staple of my wardrobe - I hope you aren't too disappointed about that! Neither monocle nor cane, either... ...yet.

5) Thank you for at least admitting it! You should go there some time if you get the chance!

(Thenceforth I'll not be using TSR very much, with uni about to start and so on. If you ever want to have the pleasure of meeting me in London just add me on the old facey-b and I'll see what I can do. Tata for now!

Hello I just wondered if you got some notes for f214 and f215 if thats alright i would really appreaciate it ? thank alot

Naaaw, there, there, it's ok if you didn't know the word. No idea what you're on about; my career path will not be in physics, anyway.

Erm, nice one: go round where? Did you mean around and around? You do realise that a scientific theory is not the same as the word used in common language, yes?. Scientific theories are substantiated by masses of evidence; the ground is most sturdy indeed. Whence did you ascertain this nonsensical drivel?

Hah good girl! You've got some amount of taste it seems. I was hoping you'd be disgusted by the Harry Potter reference and you didn't disappoint.

That "epilogue" was not cliched at all.

Gay Slayer? No, but if it's anything like what the name of it suggests, I'm rather glad I didn't!

If that's all you take from the Plato quote you're missing the point, sweetie.

Though I do concur about my being adorable, my good lady, what, I must ask, are you talking about!? The word "sheeple" isn't at all prehistoric, it's from the mid-to-late 20th century! Plus, I think it's kind of catchy. Don't you?*

The smiley you used screams "I'm a Somalian pirate!" but you said you're an Omani. For your information, I googled Omani women, and they look anything but fearsome.

"You must admit"? You'd not have replied after months of absence had it not existed, darling. It was never up for debate. I'm not the real deal. I'm an exclusive luxury item, not a bargain good. Sort out your words, ma'am.

Me too. Whenever I'm feeling bad about myself, I just look at... well, anyone else, really, and I feel so awesome again.

What sort of accent do you have? I'm curious.

What did you think of Portugal, huh? Pretty spectacular, even the pictures without me on!

*If you answered yes in your head, you're just doing so because I said I did and thus you are a sheeple. Hah.

Come now (go on, pervert that, I dare you ) the majority of these posts is mere tomfoolery. I do not actually believe I am the world, neither do I believe that I am God, nor that there is a God, nor that I know everything. So au contraire, mon ami, we physicists, or myself at least, are terribly humble people. As the great Plato wrote: This man, on one hand, believes that he knows something, while not knowing anything. On the other hand, I – equally ignorant – do not believe that I know anything. In other words, it is only an arrogant fool that would claim anything with absolute certainty, whilst the man who admits he cannot know for certain is most wise indeed.

I frikkin' love the Ancient Greeks even more than Shakespeare.

South Asian, hey hey? Hah no dear; not an ageing, balding fat bloke. I think you misspelled 'dapper six-foot gent, athletic in build, with dashing good looks, slick brown hair with a natural blonde streak and more charm than a Pandora bracelet'. I forgiveth thee.

Actually I hate my blonde streak, but other people seem to like it. Rather bizarrely it only comes through in the summer too. I make an effort to dress to a high standard and expect other people to do the same. I scoff at those lacking style sense, especially the sheeple, with their "hollister" and "jack wills". Oh my, it amuses me so. I have no issue with people wearing a brand, that'd be hypocritical I suppose, but wearing it for the sake of showing the logo off is pathetic and, frankly, is laughable. Wannabes and sheeple, gotta' love 'em.

Loving these rants.

Anyhoo, sheeple besides, I'm so angry at you for not coming to Imperial, () for I should've liked to see you make such oddball comments in person. (Though I imagine you may argue the same on that front!)

You're a joke of a vacation. Portugal was stunning.

Ergo what? If you're asking what it means, it's just a shorter word for "therefore". It's ok I'll keep it as our little secret that you adore theoretical physicists to the point you capitalise it even subconsciously.

You, cutie pie. What's this talk of Schrodingers cat? N'aaaw That's not all that's gigantic. By which I mean I have a large pen...Is that what you thought I meant?

But to take a (momentary) break from my typical buffoonish commentary, I do think it's great that you've learned some physics. If you fully grasp the idea behind "Schrodingers Cat" and the uncertainty principle (i.e. that particles have some "link" between them until they interact with something else, before which time we don't know what state they're in, but after which we know the state of both, due to the link they shared; and that we don't know what things that are really really small are doing unless we look at them, and when we do look at them, we can't measure both where they are and how they're moving to an arbitrary precision at the same time) then it may just help you see the world in a different light... suddenly everything is just more fascinating to think about and ponder. If, on the very odd chance you do ever want to ask a physicsy type question please do, I love trying to explain things to people, it's such a beautiful subject. Yes, technically it's science, but really it's like trying to deconstruct the most brilliant work of art imaginable and find the "motivation" behind each brushstroke. Class dismissed!

Ok, madhat on again. Shakespeare was not a "dude"; such colloquial language is not befitting of his magnificent name and legacy. He was a Sir. A gent. And a wizard, Harry! No, no, wait, wrong line. Oops.

Lies! LIES, I tell thee! Ergo? What blasphemy is this? You shall burn, kind sir for such an abysmal, foul mouthed.... trumpeting. You shall regret the day you...... wait... I didn't capitalise intentionally. That was a backfired... I didn't mean... Oh, nevermind. *sigh*

Who you callin' cute?!

After the whole array of insults you threw my way, you DARE call me CUTE aswell?! Oh, thou hast guts! Thou has gigantic guts to do so!

And you went on to identify me as a psychopath. You're full of wise decisions today, aren't you?

Besides, BBT IS kinda physicist.... I learnt about Shrodinger's Cat that way... AND on an unrelated note, I've been practising the Texan accent by mimicking Sheldon's mom c: Hah!

Suck on that!



Physicists are lonely people, I presumed. It makes sense that someone who deliberately and knowingly decides to dictate to others that he is... the World... would be lonely, considering the social implications of course. Perhaps he'd be befriending lamposts and stray mice on a 'WILD' night out.

Who knows?

Ah... Shrodinger's Cat, I suppose.

Yes. Yes, I am asian. South Asian. Taller than 4" I promise you. And thanks very much. We do indeed dress more appropriately than most of the.., uh.. natives? What exceptions? What stereotypes?! I'd rather think of you as an aging mature with a bald patch then. Fine. That's sorted.

I didn't accept because I knew I screwed up some exams like my Chemistry ones. I got an offer from Southampton and Imperial. That was based on my predicted (and some begging on my personal statement). I'll go in as a graduate later, that's the plan anyway.

Pharmacology was actually my plan D. I wanted Biochemistry or at least Chemistry but hey, Asian parents are scary. They literally MADE me choose it.

Shakespearean language is byooteefurl and if you don't like it gtfo thou most impertinent, folly-fallen strumpet.

Yeah, have fun deciphering that.

Nah Portugal was mid 30s, never got close to 55! That's some crazy heat. What do you do when it's that hot? I cannot fathom a single activity (well, maybe one ) that would be enjoyable in heat where you're going to be sweating so unbelievably much.

Aww, that's so nice of you to say I'm nice. Twice as well no less!