I cant make my boyfriend cum...

please keep anon.

well iv been with my boyfriend for a year and during that time we've been having oral sex but iv never made him cum but he says he really enjoys it and asks for it regularly, we were chatting the other day and i found out that he masturbates almost everyday and makes himself cum so i no its not a medical problem and iv heard that loads of masturbation could be the reason why i wouldnt be able to. sow long would it it take for me to make him cum if he stops masturbating? and is it unreasonable for me to ask him to stop? i have nothing wrong with him doing it but it gets me down that i cant finish the job properly. any thoughts on this would be appreciated...

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Reply 1

Riggers

ask him why he thinks he cant cum with you...shouldnt be any problem with you

Reply 2

Dionysus

If he's masturbating a lot before sex, it would certainly make it more difficult to achieve orgasm.

Reply 3

sib

I could never finish my ex with oral :frown:

SO FRUSTRATING!! he was the same, asked for it a lot etc, so instead oral was part of a bigger picture, to get him really into it and then finish him off another way... was better for us both :smile:

Reply 4

Aesop

In my experience it's quite hard to cum from just oral. Have you had sex with him yet? Do you use your hands ... err... thoroughly at the same time as oral?

Reply 5

tom_tom_tom

Everyone is different he obviously finds it hard to climax from oral. If he said he likes it and asks for it alot, then that hints that he actually does like it. I wouldnt worry that your boyfriend is broken, or you are not doing a good job, it may just be one of those things.

Reply 6

happy watermelon

Firstly, it's quite hard i think for guys to cum with oral. Mine can, but i usually finish him off other ways. Secondly the fact that he's masturbating so much will probably make him less able to cum.
I wouldn't worry :smile:

Reply 7

moshing-fairy

My boyfriend doesn't either.
I find it weird.
He's fine with sex. but can't through oral/ or doesnt lol. my ex did and i find this unsettling sometimes but meh reading the advice above suggests it's not so unusual.

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

had a similar problem.
use your hands at the same time, or alternately.
i introduced a 'w a nking ban' he didn't mind , it was good fun and it worked.

Reply 9

shaf_999

looks likes he doesn't get turned on when your there in other word he does'nt like you i would thought it was quit obvious

Reply 10

Anonymous #3

i've given up trying to get mine off through just oral, he enjoys it but takes far too long. combination of hand + mouth at the same usually does the job pretty well (and quickly).

Reply 11

Segat1

Everyone is different and it's not a requirement of oral sex to bring your partner to orgasm. If he's enjoying it then I don't think you need to worry. In my experience it's 50/50 those who do orgasm/those who don't (through oral sex).

Reply 12

Anonymous #4

As others have said, mixture of mouth and hand is pretty effective.

My boyfriend wouldn't come when I did oral for ages, eventually he admitted it was because he was worried about coming in my mouth. So i made it clear it was fine by me, and after that it was fine.

So it may be worth clarifying with your boyfriend that there is nothing else that worries him while you give him oral, as stresses make it much harder to come.

Reply 13

jack747

If he is masturbating every day its going to be hard for you to make him cum as he knows exactly what he wants.

Ask him what to do and how to do it properly, if you dont talk about sex and what you both like you wont have as good sex life.

Reply 14

Cj-Tj

Tell him to stop mastubating for a week or 2 then see what happens. Its quite easy to make guys come through oral if a girl really knows what shes doing, there are several places of stimulation near the end of the penis which can be got at by the person giving. But stop him mastubating then have proper sex and see what happens. If you make him really relaxed (give a massage, or whatever) then hes more likey to come.

Reply 15

jjbristol

my gf does the same. i dont mind as it still feels great but she gets pissed. try going a bit wild on it and massage the balls a little. use the teeth too

Reply 16

jjbristol

Cj-Tj

WHAT

You can't tell a guy to stop masturbating for a week. That's like telling him to go rape somebody :no:

Reply 17

Plato123

Try a foot job :ninja:

Reply 18

Kieran88

Isn't oral supposed to be just a tease really anyway?? Thus foreplay!!

Reply 19

Cj-Tj

jjbristol

WHAT

You can't tell a guy to stop masturbating for a week. That's like telling him to go rape somebody :no:

Yeah, tell me about it, I had no gf with me and no internet for about 10 days!!! But..... the results when I was with my gf more than made up for a ****-less week.