Well, there are some good points and bad points about this.
The good points, are that you have a semi-broad array of content and you go through it logically, each section. That's nice, it's coherent and fluent, however... when you mention about Solitaire (don't assume the reader is a moron, leave the explanation out as it reduces the formality by suggesting the reader is of an un-educated state therefore lowing said formality of language) In addition, you should develop and analyse the symbolism and depth of meaning more.
For example, you mention about Whit wanting to escape loneliness,
{ don't you think it's ironic that he's on a ranch, in the middle of nowhere surrounded by people he has no particular interest in, in this instance perhaps we could assume, that whit's loneliness is over played and hiding a deeper meaning of jealousy or hatred for some of the members or perhaps the fact that he is jealous of Curly and the women therefore, he spends much of his time alone contemplating what to do etc. }
Stuff like that will get you extra marks because it's original fresh content that seldom few people at least at GCSE will write about.