Anxiety experiences and support

What kinds of threads do you mean (if you want to say)?

College. Blergh. I'd tell you not to worry about it, but I'm sure you will anyway. All you can do is put whatever you have available of yourself, into it. Just make sure you don't use too much of yourself, because it sounds like you need a lot just to deal with your own mind right now, and you don't have a whole lot to spare for unimportant things like college. You have to focus on yourself first, before anything else. If that means ignoring college for a couple of days and letting yourself go, then so be it. At times like this, you have to prioritise, and YOU are the priority.

Sleep.. meh. If you're tired, then yes, try to get some sleep if you can. If you don't feel tired or you can't get off to sleep, then don't bother. Stay up, get up and do something active even. Get your body to freak out about what the hell is going on - run up and down the stairs a few times or do some juggling. I often find that something really weird and distracting is great to pull the plug on inexplicable anxiety. It's like your body/mind gets stuck, caught on something, and you have to do something slightly drastic to unstick it. If that means going for a walk round the block at midnight, then go ahead. Like I said, it's time to prioritise, and you are more important than petty societal conventions that say that people should be sleeping at this time of day. It really doesn't matter as much as we'd like to think.

I have a question for people with SA, when you have an anxiety attack whats happens to you? I think I may have mild SA but i could just be shy, I do go red and are embarrassed very easily too.

What kinds of threads do you mean (if you want to say)?

College. Blergh. I'd tell you not to worry about it, but I'm sure you will anyway. All you can do is put whatever you have available of yourself, into it. Just make sure you don't use too much of yourself, because it sounds like you need a lot just to deal with your own mind right now, and you don't have a whole lot to spare for unimportant things like college. You have to focus on yourself first, before anything else. If that means ignoring college for a couple of days and letting yourself go, then so be it. At times like this, you have to prioritise, and YOU are the priority.

Sleep.. meh. If you're tired, then yes, try to get some sleep if you can. If you don't feel tired or you can't get off to sleep, then don't bother. Stay up, get up and do something active even. Get your body to freak out about what the hell is going on - run up and down the stairs a few times or do some juggling. I often find that something really weird and distracting is great to pull the plug on inexplicable anxiety. It's like your body/mind gets stuck, caught on something, and you have to do something slightly drastic to unstick it. If that means going for a walk round the block at midnight, then go ahead. Like I said, it's time to prioritise, and you are more important than petty societal conventions that say that people should be sleeping at this time of day. It really doesn't matter as much as we'd like to think.

Hi, I really need to get focused on my work tbh. I think I've given myself a bit too many days off and I really need to rack up these grades fast in order to get into my first choice uni. I'm half way through the course and haven't got near half the amount of merits I need to meet my offer! So yeah that's stressful but I decided to make use of the tasks app on my phone and set dates and times where I should work on certain pieces of work so hopefully that can make things clearer for me.

I think I'm nocturnal! I don't feel tired at all at night but the rest of the day I'm shattered. Might try what you said and I've banned myself from going on the current affairs forum seeing as I seem to be getting really sensitive and I'm getting unnecessarily stressed by stupid people.

Thanks for your advice.

Hi, I really need to get focused on my work tbh. I think I've given myself a bit too many days off and I really need to rack up these grades fast in order to get into my first choice uni. I'm half way through the course and haven't got near half the amount of merits I need to meet my offer! So yeah that's stressful but I decided to make use of the tasks app on my phone and set dates and times where I should work on certain pieces of work so hopefully that can make things clearer for me.

I think I'm nocturnal! I don't feel tired at all at night but the rest of the day I'm shattered. Might try what you said and I've banned myself from going on the current affairs forum seeing as I seem to be getting really sensitive and I'm getting unnecessarily stressed by stupid people.

Thanks for your advice.

I guess, I don't do intentionally, but that's probably why. It's probably natural for people with SA to hide weakness, we are sensitive folk...

I actually do the same; I keep in shape, workout, look after my skin/teeth. I won't leave the house unless I'm comfortable with how I look. I know it's irrational as I have never been told anything other than I'm good looking, never been bullied or anything. Still, making an effort is only positive. Ah, I'm starting to sound as vain as you... (jk)

Even with close friends I struggle. If we're out, I'll be anxious looking around and thinking I should have stayed at home, then I'll have a few drinks and be fine for a couple of hours, and after that, I just get really tired and lose all motivation\enjoyment. Being quiet for a long time is really exhausting, making you hyper aware of everything and yourself. I have improved a little on that, unless it's with people I don't know, people who are loud/unpredictable or if I'm tired. Also hate noise, I can't think clearly and it sets my anxiety right off.

How weird is all that ^
I just don't know how I happen to be like this.

Mindfulness, Talking therapies. The former would good if your problems stem from GAD. Have you thought about going private? I know it's expensive but they will probably invest more time into it. Look up those types of therapies and see what's available and talk to your GP first.

Also, what meds did you try?

There absolutely is, and I'm really angry your doctor would even imply that. Admittedly, they are the primary options the NHS will offer, but there are other possibilities, both on the NHS and privately, still available to you. Can I ask how old you are? In my town, there is a child&adolescent mental health place, and they have quite a few alternative-style therapists, such as EFT and EMDR. If that kind of thing appeals to you, you could look into it.
Have you tried switching to a different medication, or have you decided you don't want to have to take medication? Because there are many possibilities so if one doesn't work for you, it's still likely that another one might.
From my personal experience, I think psychodynamic therapy is the most effective for me. It's the most 'typical' talking therapy - you ramble away, the therapist listens most of the time, and then responds with what they've made of everything you've said. I find it a great way to work out what's going on in my head, just by saying it and having someone else bounce it back to you with a different angle. Unfortunately, I think it's pretty difficult to get access to on the NHS, but it might be worth asking your doctor about it specifically if that's something you're interested in. It's also really important to remember that, while private therapists may charge high fees, many are extremely open to offering appropriate reductions to people who need it. My therapist is about £40 a session I think, but my parents were really hard for cash a few months ago due to an unfortunate combination of things, and they just contacted her and she was happy to reduce the price by half - just from one email. And I wouldn't be surprised if she would have considered reducing it even more if we'd been really desperate. So don't be afraid to ask, because it's really likely that they will be happy to charge you less if you need.

Can I just say, I can relate to what you're saying about being stuck at work for a set number of hours, so much so I could be reading something *I've* written. Can I ask what your job is? Sorry if you've mentioned it before

You don't have a job. You want to get a job. Pay attention, Amy. Sorry
OK, well, jobs. I started a job at McDonald's in December. I'd been applying all summer, despite convincing myself that I would never be able to have job, for the exact reasons you described - I can't cope with being 'stuck' places. It's the same reason I'd freak out about school. But I got a job, and I started and I did actually manage it. After a few weeks, it was getting on top of me, I had to call in sick a couple of days because I couldn't deal with it. I asked them to reduce my shifts to four hours maximum, which was a big help for a while. In the end, I did decide to leave, at the end of January, but overall it actually feels like a positive experience. I started a job - actually started, went to an interview, got chosen, walked in and did something independently, for money. It turned out not to be the job for me, but who cares! Lots of people start jobs that end up not right for them.
I think the point I'm trying to make is that, there WILL be a job that you can do. It might not be your standard shop assistant job, at least not at the moment, because let's be honest, it's one of the most intense jobs out there - and they expect 16 year olds to just cope! But you can't write yourself off before you've even given it a try. There will be something for you. You just need to have faith that when you find something you love, and you move into an adult environment, where you are trusted to be able to leave a room when you want to (because many shop jobs and 16-year-old jobs are disappointingly like school in that respect), then you will be able to do it. And until then, you might not be able to manage a job that someone you know might cope perfectly well with. But when you're grown up and working an independent, self-driven job, they'll be stuck somewhere, needing someone to hold their hand and tell them what to do every step of the way, and in the grand scheme of things, that's not a good position to be in.
Without wanting to keep relating things to myself , I have recently become a Betterware distributor. And it's pretty much the perfect job for me. Granted, the money isn't that great, but the point is, I'm doing something, by myself, and with my own reasons and motivation, earning money for myself. I choose when I work and how much and how long for, and if I can't be bothered to work on that day, I don't have to. No biggie. No one calling me up to ask where I am, because the work is paid by commission. If I don't get orders, then I don't get paid. If I want money, I go get orders, if I can't be bothered to work, I don't get money. It's as simple as that, and I love it. In fact I highly recommend it. Like I said, it's not enough to pay your way through university or anything like that, but to me it feels like an important step on the way to independence and being able to do things for myself and by myself.

I really didn't mean for that to become so rambly!

I tried 2 different types of beta blockers. They didn't really help too much and honestly, they gave me heart pain.
When I brought that up with the doctor they just said "Oh it shouldn't do that" and left it at it as if I was making it up or something.

I don't really want to take medication as I believe you'd just become reliant on it. It's just a temporary solution, you don't actually fix the problem.

I'm just thinking therapy isn't going to work. I don't know. I know there isn't a miracle cure or anything and at the end of the day, it's up to us to cure it ourselves by getting out there, but there just doesn't seem to be anything to help with that.

I wonder if hypnotherapy would work? Has anyone tried it?

I'm 17.

Interesting experience and well done for getting that job!

My mum does something very similar. She does something called Chocolates for Chocoholics. Maybe you've heard of it?
Just like you, she works for herself and only gets paid if she gets the orders. But that's party plan and she goes to houses and fairs and whatnot.

It was always something I was going to do and start helping her with as soon as I got a car, but this has got in the way. Grr.

I know this sounds silly and whimsical but you know in movies/books when people work at shops where it's family run so the people are really nice and are more like friends than co workers and are really flexible so would understand everything and whatnot.... I think that'd be perfect.
But I don't live somewhere where there's anywhere like that.

I've finally spoken to my Latin teacher about having anxiety and she's been really nice about it- I can get a couple of extra sessions to go over what I miss when I can't make it in and if she calls on me and I'm freaking out, I can just say "pass". The thing is, there's only about 12 people in my class and we all know each other fairly well and have a bit of a laugh and there is no way on earth they'd let me get away with just saying "pass" to a question. It feels like it's a choice between freaking out and not being able to answer the question (even though I do know it, I just panic) and looking stupid, or looking like a complete weirdo.

Ok, well then go for: if you can't answer the question, say something else. Tell the teacher that that's what you're doing, so they know you're not being an ass, but don't tell your mates. That way, you become the class joker to them, who answers things like "so what's house in latin?" with "ananas!" (I only know a little bit of latin). But yeah, pick a few go-to phrases, tell the teacher that you don't want to stand out from your friends too much and run with it. I'm sure the teacher will understand. Hell, they might help you come up with some amusing phrases that will help you learn AND help you not look stupid.

It's a good idea, but I'm at university and people don't really play up in class here. If they ask me to translate some lines and I say something silly I'll just look like a moron.
Fortunately I had a really good morning today, to the point where I could actually volunteer and ask questions even when I wasn't being directly asked.

Need to get work done and I'm not really using TSR except for this thread, so I'm going to kill my TSR account. Just thought I'd pop in to let you guys know I'm going. Thank you all for being amazing. If for some reason you want to find me on the internet, search for dungeonkeepr, you'll find me somewhere

I have slight social anxiety, I have a habit of making assumptions about things, then when the event comes up it is never as bad as I imagined. I always feel like people are judging me and when it comes to conversations with people I don't know that well I know what I want to say but I physically can not say it. Anyone else get this? I've improved loads and I am more confident now but I still hate meeting new people, any advice on how to be more relaxed and less awkward?

Ahh me too! I always assume the worst in any situation and worry about it but when it actually happens i cannot think of a single time where it has gone as bad as i thought it would. I don't know why i keep thinking like that

I know plenty of nice people at uni and i can be myself around them, but still a bit shy sometimes i'm not able to physically say things i want to either. I'm awful at meeting new people too, everyone has been so nice to me here but i'm really struggling to make any more friends now everyone has their groups. I can talk to new people but not very well.. if you get me? I constantly worry that they won't like me. Its even worse when its a girl i like, i get so awkward i'm never brave enough to tell her. Really upsets me because i've had lots of people tell me my good qualities, that i'm a nice person etc, i wish i could be like that around everyone!

Are you at school/college/uni?

I'm still at school but I really want to go to Uni, my friends don't drink so if I have about 2 glasses of beer they assume I'm drunk just because I get more confident... It really is quite remarkable. But with guys I do normally tell them I like them straight out, but I go red and my palms get sweaty so it is probably not attractive and I've only done it twice with guys I know really well and people told me they like me back so I'm not scared of rejection as much.

I'm so awkward around people but I guess now I use that to my advantage, people have a habit of calling me 'cute' though which is really belittling when I'm older than most of them :/ What you studying at Uni?