The Student Room Group

Do girls like virgins?

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Original post by alawhisp
No point moaning about it.

:mmm: hehe
Reply 41
Original post by 4RealBlud
I dont understand what's so difficult about sex that you'd apparently be a retard about the whole thing on your first time. You're having sex, not attempting to ride a unicycle on a beam. How can you not know what you're doing? You've never watched porn, ffs? Not that porn should be the frame of how to do it, but surely it'd give you some idea of what to do. It'd at least teach you the positions. As for lasting long, well, most guys have been jerking off since their early teens. If you haven't learn to control yourself in all that time, well then what the hell have you been doing? Surely if you're enthusiastic and a bit more exploratory on your first goes then you'll AT LEAST be adequate and satisfactory.


You've had sex? :rolleyes:
Original post by tehFrance
I don't know, I was speaking to some girls at lunch today and everyone was celebrating one of the guys finally losing his virginity which made me ask them would they mind if a guy they hooked up with was a virgin 4 said no, 1 said yes and the rest were indifferent to it. It was a very small sample but still :tongue:

Although to the 4 that said no, why didn't they do the lad a favour :tongue:


Well during friendly chats like that I think most people would say they don't mind. However after sleeping with one, I'm sure they would be disappointed and wouldn't really wan't to continue sleeping with the same guy.
I do get the appeal of a virgin guy. I mean even I think it would be interesting to sleep with a virgin. :}
Take that innocence away, but in the long term wouldn't want to be with them unless they were amazing in bed. (unlikely...) Do the guy a favour sounds a bit bad though :biggrin: It's nothing bad to be a virgin, they will lose it in their own time. We all had to go through that, some people sooner than later but we all have been there. Just go with the flow if you're a virgin and don't stress about losing it. The only way to become a sex god in bed is by having plenty of sex and listening to the other partners needs. Many guys learn quick ;]
I don't mind either way. I'm a virgin myself so I might be a little put off by someone with loads of experience, and would most likely prefer a virgin to that, but in the end, if you really like someone and want to sleep with them, past experience just doesn't matter.

I think ultimately it seems like it depends on what kind of sex you're looking for - I get the impression most people would rather not sleep with a virgin during a one night stand, because that's simply for the sex, but if it's something more serious than that, I don't think it matters.
(edited 12 years ago)
Not particularly, no. The only time I attempted to have sex with a virgin we gave up - freshers' week, both virgins, neither of us knew what the hell we were doing. It wasn't going in quickly and it had been a spur of the moment thing after a good night had ended (not a totally random pull - we lived in the same halls).

The other guys I've had sex with haven't - I prefer it that way if it's casual because they know what they're doing and take the initiative in the bedroom. (although I don't really want him to have been with loooooads of other girls!!)

Relationship-wise if a guy was a virgin it wouldn't put me off him though; in many ways I'd think it was quite sweet that he's kept it for so long. I wouldn't want to take someone's virginity if I wasn't serious about them though (ie not a ONS etc) because I wouldn't want the responsibility/emotional attachment. If I was emotionally attached through sex and he was too but I wasn't actually attracted to him in a relationshippy way people are only going to get hurt.
Original post by Vohamanah
It would make me run a mile, I don't want that responsibility :s-smilie:


What responsibility is involved? :confused:

Just spread your legs and let him thrust, it's not as if you've signed up to adopt a child or something that genuinely has responsibility attached to it.
Original post by Smack
What responsibility is involved? :confused:

Just spread your legs and let him thrust, it's not as if you've signed up to adopt a child or something that genuinely has responsibility attached to it.


Everyone remembers their first time. Your first time shapes your view of sex for years afterwards.

I'm 26, I don't need to be teaching someone what goes where and how you do this or that. For teenagers, fair enough, most people are pretty inexperienced and its not unusual.

By the time you get to 26 your peers are squeezing out babies like there's no tomorrow. If I met a guy my age who was a virgin I genuinely would run a mile. There's got to be some reason, whether planned or not, that he's a virgin. If it planned its worse, because it would mean he would be breaking that for me and to be honest I'm not into babies or marriage or anything like that so I doubt I'd be able to give him the commitment he was after in return.

And to be honest "spread your legs and let him thrust" sounds like you're hardly a cassanova yourself =P
Original post by Vohamanah
Everyone remembers their first time. Your first time shapes your view of sex for years afterwards.

I'm 26, I don't need to be teaching someone what goes where and how you do this or that. For teenagers, fair enough, most people are pretty inexperienced and its not unusual.

By the time you get to 26 your peers are squeezing out babies like there's no tomorrow. If I met a guy my age who was a virgin I genuinely would run a mile. There's got to be some reason, whether planned or not, that he's a virgin. If it planned its worse, because it would mean he would be breaking that for me and to be honest I'm not into babies or marriage or anything like that so I doubt I'd be able to give him the commitment he was after in return.

And to be honest "spread your legs and let him thrust" sounds like you're hardly a cassanova yourself =P


I know plenty of people that cannot remember their first time, and I'm not quite as old as you.

What happens if it wasn't planned?
Original post by Smack
I know plenty of people that cannot remember their first time, and I'm not quite as old as you.

What happens if it wasn't planned?


I don't know anyone who, within two years of losing their virginity (who was sober when it happened) cannot remember anything about it =/ Even if they forget after two years, that's a long time to be remembered. And as I said I'm not in for marriage or kids, so although I'm not into casual sleeping around, it won't mean anything near as much to me as it would for him.

Well, to be quite honest, by the time you get to 26 the only people who are virgins are those who are for religious reasons or are saving themselves for marriage. I'm not religious, and I'm not marriage material so those people are unlikely to figure in my sex life. In the unlikely event that I meet someone who is my age, who I would /want/ to have sex with (and him the same) and who was a virgin for neither of the above reasons, I would think about it, but again I wouldn't want to lead him into something that would mean a lot more to him than it would to me so I'd see it as a huge disadvantage to a relationship, to be quite honest.
Reply 49
Original post by Tomac
Real world girls don't like guys with no experience.


As you're a guy, I'm not surprised you'd think that. Actually though- it really depends on the girl, as you can see from this thread (where a bunch of "real world" girls have commented for your reading pleasure.)
Original post by Vohamanah
it won't mean anything near as much to me as it would for him.


Why are you assuming that it will mean anything to him? I've honestly never known a guy whose v-card meant anything to him; in fact most I know threw it away at the first opportunity and seemed to be quite happy with their decisions.

It's only on TSR that I've ever heard of the notion that losing your virginity actually means anything. :s-smilie:


Well, to be quite honest, by the time you get to 26 the only people who are virgins are those who are for religious reasons or are saving themselves for marriage.


You've obviously never been in an electrical engineering or computer programming department. :tongue:

but again I wouldn't want to lead him into something that would mean a lot more to him than it would to me so I'd see it as a huge disadvantage to a relationship, to be quite honest.


So response to first quote.
Original post by Smack
Why are you assuming that it will mean anything to him? I've honestly never known a guy whose v-card meant anything to him; in fact most I know threw it away at the first opportunity and seemed to be quite happy with their decisions.


So why would they still be a virgin at 26? :rolleyes:

I rest my case.
Original post by Vohamanah
So why would they still be a virgin at 26? :rolleyes:

I rest my case.


Well, lots of guys haven't managed to make any opportunities for various reasons.
I hate how some girls judge us virgin guys that way, we are not weirdos nor planned for some of us.... we have our own reasons, for example forced to travel with my family all the time till this age, it wasn't my fault.. infact I sometimes hate myself for still being a virgin, at 23 right now if I tell any of my mates they will so make fun of me even though we are in uni.

I still didn't get the chance the meet the girl I like, yes I went with few girls on dates... but they weren't my type or I ended up finding two of them were weirdos. I am still trying to find a decent girl, sadly no luck :frown:
Reply 54
Original post by Tel8
As you're a guy, I'm not surprised you'd think that. Actually though- it really depends on the girl, as you can see from this thread (where a bunch of "real world" girls have commented for your reading pleasure.)


Goodluck getting pleased by a guy who doesn't even know what the A-spot is :wink:
Reply 55
Original post by Tomac
Goodluck getting pleased by a guy who doesn't even know what the A-spot is :wink:


Dude, like I said - everything depends on the girl. And I don't remember saying I was *that* girl.
Reply 56
Original post by alawhisp
Um.. Probably because masturbating and having sex are two different things, that feel very different. Controlling masturbation is completely different to controlling yourself during sex.. It's a tad harder to stay focused when you're inside a hot, naked woman than it is when you're jerking it to Japanese schoolgirls :rolleyes:

And if you're getting your sex education from porn, then you're going to have unrealistic expectations.. Most porn is male-centric, you don't really learn much about how to please a woman by watching it. Certain things you learn from experience.. The right rhythm for each girl, the right angle, the right foreplay and the right level of passion.. Every girl is different. No point moaning about it, everyone starts off a virgin.


No-ones moaning, i was just expressing how i couldn't see the logic of your point of view. And tbf, people being good on their first time isn't exactly something unheard of.
Reply 57
Original post by tehFrance
WTF then you don't know what it is like, Dry sex is also nothing like sex... it isn't easy to last long on your first time, it takes practice.

Maybe, I guess, I reckon it isn't as hard but I haven't tried it yet so for all I know I'll last 2 seconds probably.

You're right about it should be 20 mins to half an hour, no matter what you do, you'll be sore after that, let alone having sex.
Reply 58
Original post by Anonymous
I hate how some girls judge us virgin guys that way, we are not weirdos nor planned for some of us.... we have our own reasons, for example forced to travel with my family all the time till this age, it wasn't my fault.. infact I sometimes hate myself for still being a virgin, at 23 right now if I tell any of my mates they will so make fun of me even though we are in uni.

I still didn't get the chance the meet the girl I like, yes I went with few girls on dates... but they weren't my type or I ended up finding two of them were weirdos. I am still trying to find a decent girl, sadly no luck :frown:


Sad. I know how you feel, especially with the weirdo girlfriends. Plus there's the chance that the girl is extremely up herself and will make you wait for months.
Reply 59
I see these types of threads a lot and whilst I've been there before, I don't think it is something one should worry about a great deal. I'm not going to lie and I have to make the point that for women with experience, they prefer to have a man with more of it than her (sometimes even if they say otherwise). There are other factors to take into account such as what role a person wants to fulfil in a relationship; some people prefer to be more dominant, and others more submissive. You can't halt biology though as women generally don't want to be the teacher.

To a certain degree it's possible to intuitively discern another person's level of experience. In this case you shouldn't worry because if someone believes you are a virgin and is put off because of this, then that is one less person to think about in the sphere of dating. The right person will come along who feels you are a fit. When people are put off dating someone who's a virgin, this isn't anything personal. As you date more, you become less idealistic and more straight-up about what you think would provide the right balance in a relationship. If anything, it is actually beneficial that people will come out and say what their views are. You wouldn't want someone to dress up the facts; it's better to see the world how it is, and accept that there's a level of people's perceptions outside of your control. It's a lot less kind for people to be too all-embracing in dating. They start off with good intentions but only later face up to what they really want. It's better to address this at the outset.

At the same time, you have to realise that sleeping with lots of women doesn't equate to being good at pleasuring a woman. It's possible that it can be but it's not really relevant. I don't think women are necessarily put off by virgins because of a lack of sexual experience. They are more put off by the potential for a lack of relationship experience, which is really important. Some men aren't necessarily in tune with a woman's emotional needs, which are part-and-parcel of her sexual experience (orgasms are in the mind). Men have to be aware of the primeval level of attraction which women strongly respond to. For clarification of what I mean, refer to Alan Roger Currie as an example.

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