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he's gone silent...

anon or delete

Okay, basic jist: Met a guy, started texting, added each other on facebook. He asked whether I wanted to meet up next (this) week, I said yes I would and when was he free. Then he completely stopped contact. I haven't heard anything since Friday and it is now the week that he was reffering to meet up. This is so bizare as he seemed so keen at first and now it's like he's completely forgotten about it.

Does this sound like he's lost interest? Or should I just wait a little longer? Considering it's now wednesday I reckon he has changed his mind...I am starting to worry whether I have done something wrong/he saw something on my facebook that he didn't like...:confused:
Original post by Anonymous
anon or delete

Okay, basic jist: Met a guy, started texting, added each other on facebook. He asked whether I wanted to meet up next (this) week, I said yes I would and when was he free. Then he completely stopped contact. I haven't heard anything since Friday and it is now the week that he was reffering to meet up. This is so bizare as he seemed so keen at first and now it's like he's completely forgotten about it.

Does this sound like he's lost interest? Or should I just wait a little longer? Considering it's now wednesday I reckon he has changed his mind...I am starting to worry whether I have done something wrong/he saw something on my facebook that he didn't like...:confused:


Ahh strange? Well, you could always just text "Hello, How are you?" etc, see if he replies and asks again to confirm everything? Otherwise maybe he's just being a guy. Otherwise I'd probably leave it, if he wants to go out, I'm sure he'll try to make it happen! :smile:

It's only midweek too! Wait till the weekend :smile:
Reply 2
If you really like him, send him a text like "Hey stranger, how u been" and see if he responds. Otherwise he's not worth your time.
Reply 3
Original post by Tizz
If you really like him, send him a text like "Hey stranger, how u been" and see if he responds. Otherwise he's not worth your time.


That would look really need though...I don't want to push him into meeting up with me. I just don't know what I've done to make him change his mind...getting paranoid now!
Reply 4
Text to ask how he is assuming you haven't done soately. But don't mention the 'going out'.

If he doesn't reply, you know something's up and better understand the situation. It may be that he's trying to gauge whether you're genuinely interested.

You have nothing to lose.
Reply 5
Has he been active on fb? Meaning he is well and alive, or even social. If so, I'd say he's not interested.
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
That would look really need though...I don't want to push him into meeting up with me. I just don't know what I've done to make him change his mind...getting paranoid now!


Like Mr Advice said, don't need to mention going out in the first text. Just a short hello message will be enough to put your mind at rest and you can either move on or continue things with the guy
Reply 7
Original post by Millie228
Has he been active on fb? Meaning he is well and alive, or even social. If so, I'd say he's not interested.


As far as I can tell, he hasn't been on - there is nothing new on his page...which seems a bit odd. However, it says on my message that it was seen on monday morning...so he has definitely read it... :s
Original post by Anonymous
As far as I can tell, he hasn't been on - there is nothing new on his page...which seems a bit odd. However, it says on my message that it was seen on monday morning...so he has definitely read it... :s


What did you actually say in your message? :smile:
Reply 9
Original post by BethanyJane
What did you actually say in your message? :smile:


I don't remember exactly but something along the lines of "yeah i'm free next week apart from monday, just let me know"
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
As far as I can tell, he hasn't been on - there is nothing new on his page...which seems a bit odd. However, it says on my message that it was seen on monday morning...so he has definitely read it... :s


Ah ok... doesn't look good then. Could be something happened, but most likely he changed his mind/has met someone else. If he is interested in seeing you, he will remember you and eventually get back to you. If you don't hear anything in a couple more days, forget him and move on.
Yeah! If he wants to go out, he'll make it happen! Just stay cool, let him chase you! :smile: Don't follow "Be mean, to keep him keen" - I only know one person this works for! I have no idea why it does! :L ahah!
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
anon or delete

Okay, basic jist: Met a guy, started texting, added each other on facebook. He asked whether I wanted to meet up next (this) week, I said yes I would and when was he free. Then he completely stopped contact. I haven't heard anything since Friday and it is now the week that he was reffering to meet up. This is so bizare as he seemed so keen at first and now it's like he's completely forgotten about it.

Does this sound like he's lost interest? Or should I just wait a little longer? Considering it's now wednesday I reckon he has changed his mind...I am starting to worry whether I have done something wrong/he saw something on my facebook that he didn't like...:confused:


My advice would be to give at least one call. Barring no answer, send ONE text to confirm whether or not you guys are up for the weekend. As a very LAST resort, I'd send one message to his facebook page, just to be SURE.

If you don't get any info confirming whether or not you guys are on, then i'd probably say to just move on. And don't worry about whether or not you did anything "wrong", if he can't at least confront you about it then he's a douche
Reply 13
It's completely natural to feel paranoid and start questioning everything and thinking that it's your fault. I've done that before too :smile: it's tiring and exhausting and not to mention heartbreaking. You've not known him long so don't get too caught up with it. If he was interested he would reply, trust me. He's really not worth it. Maybe he's busy and hasn't had time to arrange a time to meet. Maybe send him a casual 'how are you?' message or 'hey, how's your week been?' I wouldn't mention anything like 'when do you want to meet?' or 'haven't heard from you in a while?' this puts pressure on him and is quite demanding. keep your message casual, simple and conversational. It's been 5 days, which is quite a while. So sending him a message today wouldn't be seen as too soon. If he doesn't reply to that, leave it and move on.
Reply 14
Original post by hali0112
It's completely natural to feel paranoid and start questioning everything and thinking that it's your fault. I've done that before too :smile: it's tiring and exhausting and not to mention heartbreaking. You've not known him long so don't get too caught up with it. If he was interested he would reply, trust me. He's really not worth it. Maybe he's busy and hasn't had time to arrange a time to meet. Maybe send him a casual 'how are you?' message or 'hey, how's your week been?' I wouldn't mention anything like 'when do you want to meet?' or 'haven't heard from you in a while?' this puts pressure on him and is quite demanding. keep your message casual, simple and conversational. It's been 5 days, which is quite a while. So sending him a message today wouldn't be seen as too soon. If he doesn't reply to that, leave it and move on.


I guess I just want to preserve my dignity and not seem like I'm clingly or too keen. As a general rule I don't text people twice, as I hate it when people do it to me. I suppose I should just take the hint that he's not interested :frown:
Reply 15
Original post by Anonymous
I guess I just want to preserve my dignity and not seem like I'm clingly or too keen. As a general rule I don't text people twice, as I hate it when people do it to me. I suppose I should just take the hint that he's not interested :frown:


If you like him, that shouldn't matter. Go for it. Don't worry about appearing too clingy or preserving your dignity just don't be to full on. I met a guy that I really liked in a club and we were texting for ages the next day and I knew I was going home from uni the day after. I had nothing to lose. I liked him, we had things in common and I thought why not? So I asked him out that day. I'd never have had the guts to but I thought why play it cool and wait. Waiting would never have gotten me anywhere. He has sicne told me he was playing it cool and would've asked me out a few days later. By then I would have gone home.So sometimes you just need to go for it or else you will be wondering what if? what do you have to lose?
Reply 16
Ah, he's replied. Feel so silly now. Thanks for the advice everyone :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
Ah, he's replied. Feel so silly now. Thanks for the advice everyone :smile:


Yay! :smile: :banana:

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