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My boyfriend and friends constantly take the piss out of me how do i stop it

I wont lie i have 0 common sense I am not claiming not to I know sometimes I say stupid stuff but I also have severe dyspraxia and part of this is that I take longer to process things than other people If somebody asks me someting or says something I cant just understand I need a moment to think about it but usually I say stuff that comes into my head as I think its a valid answer, I also take things literally or relate them to things I know so if you said to me a name for instance Id relate it to something or somebody I have heard of and sometimes I just cant register what people are saying. However without trying to sound arragont or blowing my own trumphet im not thick I got 3 As at A level im doing a law degree and hope to be a criminal solicitor. barrister (once i get my confidence up)


My boyfriend use to take the piss constantly about what I said etc and although hes toned down sometimes he will laugh at me for instance if I dont geth is 'sarcasm' or 'rhetorical questoins' then he calls me thick and stupid. My friends are the worse at uni I feel like their stupid form of entertainment I cant say words for instance like feminime or specific yet the goade me to say it they get me to say it in front of people on nights out then all collapse around laughing. If I say something wrong or dont understand they call me an idiot and laugh at me non stop last night they laughed because I didnt know a character of star wars for 20 minutes so loudly in my ear and just making snide horrible comments. When I got drunk(my fault) I wasnt very well and at first it was funny them taking videos and pictures but when I was throwing my guts up (Im not supposed to drink) they contiuned to take photos and videos and put them on facebook and showed everybody. Everything I do or say they find a thing to laugh about a critisce their conversation is 'remeber when she did............' and then the next few hours laughing about me when im sat there and its obvious im not finding it funny or when we meet new people and they tell them 'stories' about me which is basically putting ne down and making out im some stupiud idiot. There so overbearing and patronising to me aswell everything I do im doing it wrong or not correctly or im this and that and its the same with my boyfriend.

Im just sick of it I can take the piss out of myself and regualry do but theres a difference beteween banter and joking and actually painting me out to be a stupid thick idiot, im not thick yes I may be slow due to my dyspraxia but it doesnt for one minute mean im anymroe stupid than them im doing a tougher degree i got way higher a levels im doing better than them academically at uni. I just feel like telling my bboyfriend and friends to **** off because its constant and its really upsetting me how do I stop it?
Reply 1
I don't really think these people are your friends. If one of my friends were to do something stupid we would only laugh at it for a few mins and then forget about it as everyone does silly things from time to time. Plus they should take into account your dyspraxia. (They do know that you have it and what having it means).
Have you told them how you feel. If so maybe you should try and branch out and make nicer friends. Sorry this is happening to you


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Reply 2
You need to talk to them about it, they may not realise how much it is upsetting you if you take the piss out of yourself a lot anyway. They won't stop unless you let them know it was an issue.

I remember in school I once got accused of bullying because I took the piss out of someone (no-where near to the extent you are talking about) fairly regularly and it was upsetting her. Anyway she went to the school instead of talking to me (moron) and I had no bloody clue what I had done wrong. SO speak to them, if they are worth having around they will listen to you.
Reply 3
You need to talk to them.
You should tell them to **** off. You don't treat your friends, people you care about, with such little disregard.

Honestly, I say you get rid of your boyfriend and your friends. Go make new friends; people who are worthy of you, and respect you for who you are.
Reply 5
Laugh at your boyfriend as you tell him you don't wanna be with him anymore :biggrin:
Original post by Anonymous
im doing a tougher degree i got way higher a levels im doing better than them academically at uni.


Your 'friends' sound sound unpleasant, yes, but you clearly think you are better than them and if this shows in your behaviour then that is likely a reason, if not the reason, why they act like this towards you. Just like you can't help your dyspraxia, they can't help being perhaps not quite as academically able as you. You might not think you are arrogant, but it might show in your behaviour without you realising it.

There are some genuinely nasty people out there, but if people treat you with disrespect, assess how you come across to them. Maybe you're just as bad as them, or fail to command respect from others. If you don't like how someone treats you, speak up and tell them not to do it.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I wont lie i have 0 common sense I am not claiming not to I know sometimes I say stupid stuff but I also have severe dyspraxia and part of this is that I take longer to process things than other people If somebody asks me someting or says something I cant just understand I need a moment to think about it but usually I say stuff that comes into my head as I think its a valid answer, I also take things literally or relate them to things I know so if you said to me a name for instance Id relate it to something or somebody I have heard of and sometimes I just cant register what people are saying. However without trying to sound arragont or blowing my own trumphet im not thick I got 3 As at A level im doing a law degree and hope to be a criminal solicitor. barrister (once i get my confidence up)


My boyfriend use to take the piss constantly about what I said etc and although hes toned down sometimes he will laugh at me for instance if I dont geth is 'sarcasm' or 'rhetorical questoins' then he calls me thick and stupid. My friends are the worse at uni I feel like their stupid form of entertainment I cant say words for instance like feminime or specific yet the goade me to say it they get me to say it in front of people on nights out then all collapse around laughing. If I say something wrong or dont understand they call me an idiot and laugh at me non stop last night they laughed because I didnt know a character of star wars for 20 minutes so loudly in my ear and just making snide horrible comments. When I got drunk(my fault) I wasnt very well and at first it was funny them taking videos and pictures but when I was throwing my guts up (Im not supposed to drink) they contiuned to take photos and videos and put them on facebook and showed everybody. Everything I do or say they find a thing to laugh about a critisce their conversation is 'remeber when she did............' and then the next few hours laughing about me when im sat there and its obvious im not finding it funny or when we meet new people and they tell them 'stories' about me which is basically putting ne down and making out im some stupiud idiot. There so overbearing and patronising to me aswell everything I do im doing it wrong or not correctly or im this and that and its the same with my boyfriend.

Im just sick of it I can take the piss out of myself and regualry do but theres a difference beteween banter and joking and actually painting me out to be a stupid thick idiot, im not thick yes I may be slow due to my dyspraxia but it doesnt for one minute mean im anymroe stupid than them im doing a tougher degree i got way higher a levels im doing better than them academically at uni. I just feel like telling my bboyfriend and friends to **** off because its constant and its really upsetting me how do I stop it?


wow....They all sound like pricks. You need to tell your boyfriend to stop, and if he doesn't then leave him, because its make you feel bad.
This sucks. Explain how you feel. If they continue (especially your bf), start to distance yourself, and look for other friends.
Reply 9
They sound like complete dicks. Sure many friends might have banter among themselves but they just sound like bullies tbh. You say youve done acidemically better than them, maybe they do it because they feel threatend and want to put you down? In my experience the people who call people thick over minor things (really who cares if someone doesn't know a character in a film? And almost everyone gets words mixed up when they speak sometimes) usually are the people who like to make out they're super intelligent but are average. Have you ever tried to tell them how it makes you feel? I think youre probably better off just dumping them tbh.

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(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 10
Wow they're so rude... Like really, do they expect you to know everything? Have you tried to ask them things that they don't know to embarrass them? Oh, I'd embarrass them asking things from my studies that obviously they won't have an answer and I'd laugh at them then.. Seriously, real friends don't do such stupid things, they support each other.. You should seriously talk with all of them or at least your boyfriend. If he's doing so, he's not worth you! I'm sure you're a great person and you'll meet the right guy who will support you and defend you :smile: Don't let anyone to laugh at you, stand up for yourself :wink:
Your friends probably just see it as banter, do you laugh along with them or let them know you are upset. Like others have said, you need to talk to them. Try speaking to someone close to you in the friendship group in private, someone who would have a lot of influence on the others and just tell them you don't like it.

I'm very sarcastic and a piss taker but think I know where to draw the line
And you are still with your boyfriend even though him and his friends are making fun of you and making you feel bad inside :s-smilie:
Reply 13
I can sometimes come across as a bit empty headed. I lose focus a lot and I am the type of person who over-analyses the small details and often misses the bigger picture. It can be entertaining to some people, but I know I am not stupid really from various achievements, so I really don't mind, people like me for it, so what is there to be ashamed of.
Reply 14
Original post by heirloom
I don't really think these people are your friends. If one of my friends were to do something stupid we would only laugh at it for a few mins and then forget about it as everyone does silly things from time to time. Plus they should take into account your dyspraxia. (They do know that you have it and what having it means).
Have you told them how you feel. If so maybe you should try and branch out and make nicer friends. Sorry this is happening to you


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App


This, especially if your own boyfriends insults you and knocks your confidence down, dump the bastard and find someone who values you and looks past your issue.

Your 'friends' are not you're friends, find some that value you and respect you.
Reply 15
Say to your boyfriend 'I might be slow, but your mate wasn't the other night'
my boyfriend is the exact same. At first i was fine with it, i didn’t think it would be a continuous thing but it is and really don’t know what to do about as i don’t want to argue about with him or him find me like boring and stuff like that.

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