Why are some guys virgins until into their early 20's if they are attractive?

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There's still hope yet!

Used to be ugly -> Got humiliated by girls -> realised younger/teenage girls are shallow -> got hot ->

Branch 1
-> got cocky from all the newfound attention and turns into a manwhore.

Branch 2 (attractive virgins):
-> had lost all respect for girls around him -> waited 'til one proved him wrong or just waited til he was older for a relationship?

(edited 12 years ago)

^This.

exactly that ^

Girls get attention from (usually) older guys when their young.....then as they get older, the attention decreases.....

Guys get hardly any attention in their younger years (unless the look much older) but once they are older, they get attention from younger girls

If anyone is aware of david buss psychology experiement on attractions for males and females, it's basically older men like younger women and younger women like older men.

It's a vicious circle....

Reply 65

username612213

A person being attractive doesn't necessarily mean that they would have had sex and vice versa.

Reply 66

Legionkid

Original post by infernalcradle

or maybe they are saving themselves/only want sex in a committed relationship that they haven't had yet

Don't forget that they may have had a commited relationship where the girl wouldn't have sex. The guy is suddenly on the market at 19, 20, or 21... as a virgin.

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 67

TheBlackMonster

there are a lot of good points raised in this topic

but I have to say I still don't understand how people can be good looking and not get laid, especially guys. it's like they're wasting their looks yet they're still complaining about the state of their life. I don't think it's bad if they're still a virgin though, there's no rush

it's just one of those things that personally I can't comprehend especially as girls care more about looks. the idea of them being bullied/teased by girls in school is a good theory.

Reply 68

gintoki

Original post by TheBlackMonster

it's just one of those things that personally I can't comprehend especially as girls care more about looks. the idea of them being bullied/teased by girls in school is a good theory.

I'm a good example of this.

Reply 69

Piprod01

Original post by EcclesRose

Because they have the social skills of a teaspoon?

Teaspoons get in a lot of peoples mouths! :colone:

The amazing life of a teaspoon! :tongue:

Reply 70

LipstickKisses

Original post by Kaitlyn89

I know a couple of guys who are good looking, fit and have good bodies, but they are still virgins in their early 20's. Why is this? You would think they would have lost their virginity a good few years ago, but they are still virgins. I know that one of these guys used to be overweight with bad skin when he was 16/17 years old, but now he is gorgeous and a virgin, I couldn't believe it when he told me. The other guy I don't know him that well, I only know him through a friend of a friend, so he isn't exactly a friend of mine, but he is a virgin. He is also good looking, I just don't understand it because neither of them are religious, so nothing would be holding them back. The first guy (the one who is a friend) is always getting attention from girls, especially when he takes his top off on the beach or walking in public/through town.

Maybe they haven't met the right person? Cliched but some people don't want to have sex just because they can. Just because they get attention also doesn't mean they'd be attracted to the girl. They may have very high standards.

Reply 71

KL1094

Original post by Kaitlyn89

Guy's just like girls value themselves equally as much and believe in experiencing that with the right person and some arent to bothered about hoping into bed with somebody. Its up to them its their body they can do what they like but this does illustrate that they have alot of priorities right unlike some other guys and are generally really nice guys.

Reply 72

Ace Of Diamonds

Its an interesting question to ask, however it also crosses some very personal boundaries. Unless you are in a relationship with a person like this, how is it any of your business to pry into why they are still a virgin? :confused:

It all comes down to this negative attitude to being a virgin, where people feel they have to have sex at the first opportunity or people will look down on them.
I'm still a virgin, and for a while I was made to feel bad about it by people like this. But then I wondered why I should give a flying **** that people look down on me for that? It wasn't their business, it wasn't meant kindly, and it wasn't there place to judge. :angry:

Almost all of my friends say they regret the way they lost their virginity or who they lost it to. One of my friends had sex with a stranger on holiday in Greece because she was scared to go to university still a virgin ... that just seems pathetic to me. :frown:

So yes, I didn't loose my virginity when I was 15, simply for the sake of it.
If it feels right, or you think you are with the right person then thats great, however don't judge people who have never been in that situation.

Don't get me started on people who hire prostitutes in order to loose their virginity :s-smilie:

Reply 73

IB_19

Why does it concern you? They probably have not met the right female to make such a commitment to and have not given into peer pressure and what's becoming a social norm. Alternatively, they may have religious reasons or just want to wait for the right moment.

Reply 74

cttp_ngaf

Having sex doesn't just happen to people, like without them even knowing. Attractive or not, he still has to firstly leave the house often enough, mix with enough people, get used to talking to girls, talk to enough girls in the right way (with purpose and intention) and see the whole thing through the, uh, act itself.

It requires active effort on the guy's part, and for him to accomplish things that may not come naturally. Courting rituals, as it were, are extremely complex and sensitive dances of words and actions that come naturally to most young people so they don't even think about it. But not everyone had the upbringing or inherent way about them that makes this easy. And being good looking doesn't mean that he has any clue about that stuff. Or that he has a high sex drive in the first place, of course.

Reply 75

EcclesRose

Original post by Piprod01

Teaspoons get in a lot of peoples mouths! :colone:

The amazing life of a teaspoon! :tongue:

Depends on size

Reply 76

Ahotaru

Maybe they are shy, just didn't find the right person or didn't get to know any girl with who they felt comfortable enough. Why do people get so surprised if someone is virgin at their 20s? Some people need to feel 'something else' than just sexual attraction, perhaps that's the case of your friends?

Reply 77

TheBlackMonster

Original post by gintoki

I'm a good example of this.

yeah obviously everyone would call themselves hot (manwhores) on TSR ¬_¬

Reply 78

TFarrow

Not finding the right person or an overly moral pride, I've got a friend who's kinda like that but he'd never even consider it until he was into a serious relationship (like waaaay in) and even then he'd have to be sure that the relationship was going somewhere...it's just his way of doing things I guess, sticking his middle finger to the world in a sense...?