US teen claiming to be 500yr old vampire breaks into a house and feeds

http://www.powerbuzz.org/news/teen-vampire-arrested-for-breaking-entering-and-feeding-629/

A US teenager claiming to be a 500-year-old vampire with a “need to feed” has been charged after allegedly breaking into a woman’s home before biting and hitting her.

Lyle Monroe Bensley, 19, allegedly broke into the woman’s apartment in Galveston, Texas dressed in only boxer shorts, making growling and hissing noises while bitting and hitting her in her bed, the Houston Chronicle said.

He dragged her out of the apartment but she managed to break free and run away, police spokesman Captain Jeff Heyse told the Chronicle.

The woman was not known to Mr Bensley.

When police arrived at the apartment, they saw Mr Bensley hissing and growling in the car park.

He managed to climb two fences before he was arrested, and yelled that he “didn’t want to have to feed on humans”, Captain Heyse told US broadcaster ABC.

Hilarious!!! the world gets weirder everyday...poor woman hopes she recovers from this attack at Breaking Dawn :biggrin:

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

inadilemma

Stephanie Meyer, look what you've done!!!

Reply 2

ceris

Unoriginal Twilight jokes in 3... 2... 1...

Reply 3

Shabalala

He must have been watching the South Park Episode where Butters thinks he is a vampire he must have been on the wind up because it's sounds exactly like the plot line of that South Park episode

[video="youtube;Mk8nQhOurO4"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mk8nQhOurO4[/video]
[video="youtube;6N0Ji3mVr0A"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6N0Ji3mVr0A&feature=related[/video]
[video="youtube;vzYZS0fi0AY"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzYZS0fi0AY&feature=related[/video]

Reply 4

cosmobear92

Original post by badcheesecrispy

Hilarious!!! the world gets weirder everyday...poor woman hopes she recovers from this attack at Breaking Dawn :biggrin:

Awful

Reply 5

Architecture-er

Original post by ceris

Unoriginal Twilight jokes in 3... 2... 1...

Twilight is enough of a joke on it's own :teehee:

Agree with the thought that it's a South Park wind-up, unless the guy is just a bloody nutcase

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 6

Sir Fox

Aaah, it's a beautiful world :biggrin:

Hissing and growling, doesn't want to feed on humans :biggrin:

Reply 7

GeorgetheAug

FOX NEWS: Book of evil turns children to monsters!

Reply 8

JohnC2211

Just you wait til Wesley Snipes gets out of prison, then we'll see the vampire population destroyed!

Reply 9

Spairos

Original post by badcheesecrispy

No she won't recover, she will be turned into a zombie

Reply 10

badcheesecrispy

Original post by cosmobear92

Awful

iv seen your posts so i wont take this personally :wink:

Only in America!

Original post by badcheesecrispy

iv seen your posts so i wont take this personally :wink:

It wasn't a personal attack, just pointing out that it was a terrible joke.

EDIT: forgot to add this guy :lolwut:

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 13

Bhumbauze

Original post by badcheesecrispy

yelled that he “didn’t want to have to feed on humans”

Haaahaha, this is what elevates it from mildly amusing, to hilarious. You can really see the impact of the tweenage vampire cult taking effect :facepalm:

. Classic Vampires were evil, soulless killers... now, they're self-loathing emos who cry about having to hurt people :biggrin:

. And sparkle 'n' stuff.

Personally I blame Buffy / Angel. Angel got so excited that he jizzed his soul, and at the same time, the teenage girls of the world collectively passed out because all of their blood rushed directly to their vaginas and nipples. All of the vampires were evil before then. Now they're just little balls of emotion and sexual tension with "fangs", better described as tiny erect mouth penises... massive cash cow for otherwise sub-standard authors.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 14

najinaji

Still a better love story than Twilight.

Reply 15

badcheesecrispy

Original post by cosmobear92

It wasn't a personal attack, just pointing out that it was a terrible joke.

EDIT: forgot to add this guy :lolwut:

it was a sweeping dig, id prefer to focus on the rest of the post lol. im not chris rock

Reply 16

RandomPeopleDancin

Original post by Shabalala

Reply 17

badcheesecrispy

Original post by Bhumbauze

Haaahaha, this is what elevates it from mildly amusing, to hilarious. You can really see the impact of the tweenage vampire cult taking effect :facepalm:

. Classic Vampires were evil, soulless killers... now, they're self-loathing emos who cry about having to hurt people :biggrin:

lmao i totally agree.-

Another police officer, Daniel Erickson, told the Chronicle: “He was begging us to restrain him because he didn’t want to kill us. He said he needed to feed.”

“I’m a vampire, and I’ve been alive for over 500 years,” Mr Bensley reportedly said to Mr Erickson.

A US clinical psychologist told the ABC popular films and television shows such as the Twilight series and True Blood could inspire people with mental illnesses.

“Vampires are very prominent in our society right now from a pop culture standpoint. And that information can feed into hallucination,” Associate Professor Josh Klapow of the University of Alabama at Birmingham said.

hahahahahaha its just funny that something as poncey and ridiculous as twilight is influencing this sort of schizophrenic behaviour