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GOGSoc Episode V: The GOG Strikes Back

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I found an MA course in Mysticism and Religious Experience at Kent Uni which I'd love to do in an ideal world. Though I'm not really qualified for it :ninja:

This whole thing about children is partly why I've given up on the idea of becoming an academic. That and I probably wouldn't survive the experience of academia :no:
I want children too. But I am willing to put this plan on hold till we finish our PhDs etc. I only want 2 so ideally I'll have both by the age of 35, which is not bad (Ideally I'd be 32-33 but OK)
Original post by sj27
I was thinking supportive more in terms of time, but was framing from my own experience - working full time and studying part time so career/earnings were not interrupted - of course you need a lot of discipline to do it this way, and it is certainly easier to do it this way of your children are old enough to be in school. I guess opportunities for part-time master's are very limited in a number of fields as well.


You don't have an academic job, though, right? Also I don't know how people got the idea that I was saying one couldn't have children and study. Obviously since I'm now on a full-time PhD, that question is no longer the concern. I was saying that if one wants an academic career, and children, then you don't exactly have excess time to spare for doing random extra study for fun.

I don't think there's any hope of becoming an academic by just working part time. Once I finish my PhD I'll have to work like a dog to get out of the dodgy initial bit of endless short-term contracts, and onto something where I'm allowed to teach as well as research. Basically the part time thing will be fine once we've established our careers, but before then its really going to be harmful. And of course the earliest years of a child's life are the most time consuming.
(edited 12 years ago)
Ew, babies :p:

Stupid clocks going forward. Woke up early, had like 4 hours sleep :colonhash: I think it's cos I'm excited (?!) to be going back to work after my 2 weeks off! Yaaay! Only have one week and then it's the easter hols, though. :biggrin:
Reply 2004
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sj27
14
Original post by Becca
Ew, babies :p:

Stupid clocks going forward. Woke up early, had like 4 hours sleep :colonhash: I think it's cos I'm excited (?!) to be going back to work after my 2 weeks off! Yaaay! Only have one week and then it's the easter hols, though. :biggrin:


You all healed up?
Original post by sj27
You all healed up?


Not 100%, I still feel a bit of pain when yawning or swallowing but I haven't needed any painkillers in a few days. I was at the docs on Friday and he said it still looked very rough but that is normal because it's a bit area that needs to heal.

I'm hoping a day at work won't take its toll too much as I really want to go to training this evening as well...we'll see what happens though!
I want children too but I need to find a woman first.
Original post by m:)ckel
I want children too but I need to find a woman first.

story of my life.
Reply 2008
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sj27
14
Original post by Becca
Not 100%, I still feel a bit of pain when yawning or swallowing but I haven't needed any painkillers in a few days. I was at the docs on Friday and he said it still looked very rough but that is normal because it's a bit area that needs to heal.

I'm hoping a day at work won't take its toll too much as I really want to go to training this evening as well...we'll see what happens though!


Take it easy... sometimes people underestimate how tired they get back at work after something like this! And I hope you feel 100% better soon.
Original post by Becca
Ew, babies :p:

Yep, that's pretty much my response. When all the other girls are going 'awww isn't it SOOO CUUTTEE' I'm usually thinking 'a noise-maker, run!'
So yeh... the plan is for evolutionary instincts to kick in. Or something :erm:
Problems with babies:
1) Less attention from partner.
2) Less money for fun stuff.
3) They have 50% of your genetic material.

The last one is really scary; I've heard (and remember) more than enough of me as a child, I don't think I'd be able to deal with 50% of me without lots of slapping, frankly.
Agreed.
Although the genetic material thing doesn't bother me. It makes me feel a bit reassured that there's some chance I could have something in common with my kids, and relate to them. But yeh... I also don't understand how parents don't just want to slap their kids all the time :s-smilie: Again - evolutionary instints/hormones I guess.
Original post by *Corinna*
I want children too. But I am willing to put this plan on hold till we finish our PhDs etc. I only want 2 so ideally I'll have both by the age of 35, which is not bad (Ideally I'd be 32-33 but OK)


This is essentially my plan.

I used to really not enjoy being around little kids, but now when I hear a baby crying, while in the past my instinct was to run, now I have to fight an urge to go an comfort it :s-smilie: Definitely got the broodiness hormones going on there.
Reply 2013
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sj27
14
I went from definitely not wanting kids, to really wanting them, almost overnight. It was more of a biological clock suddenly ringing than slowly ticking louder and louder (that's a really corny/crap analogy... sorry :tongue:)
My partner and I have essentially agreed to the necessity of switching 'traditional' gender roles. He is self-employed and works from home a lot of the time, but doesn't really earn enough to allow me to give up work for long maternity leave, whereas hopefully by the time we are in a place to have children, I'll have something resembling permanent employment. So short maternity leave for me, house-husbandness for him. He loves the idea...but i think he thinks it means a licence to play on eBay all day. He'll learn :biggrin:
Reply 2015
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apotoftea
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19
I've been semi seeing a guy, very nice et al but apparently being a PhD student isn't good enough girlfriend material. I mean really?! :banghead:
Original post by apotoftea
I've been semi seeing a guy, very nice et al but apparently being a PhD student isn't good enough girlfriend material. I mean really?! :banghead:


:frown: :hugs: :console:
Reply 2017
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sj27
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Original post by apotoftea
I've been semi seeing a guy, very nice et al but apparently being a PhD student isn't good enough girlfriend material. I mean really?! :banghead:


wtf??????????
Original post by apotoftea
I've been semi seeing a guy, very nice et al but apparently being a PhD student isn't good enough girlfriend material. I mean really?! :banghead:


Seems harsh! Does he understand what it's all about, or does he just see you as a threat?
Reply 2019
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apotoftea
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Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd
:frown: :hugs: :console:


Original post by Athena

WTF does that mean? Sounds like a bit of a douche, TBH...


Original post by sj27
wtf??????????


Original post by Cora Lindsay
Seems harsh! Does he understand what it's all about, or does he just see you as a threat?


Christ knows what it means! I think there is an issue over what I actually do on a day to day basis and I guess if you've never had a friend who's done a PhD how would you know what it involves? I got the 'I'm 7 years into my career and you've not started one yet' speech. Kindly pointed out that without doing a PhD I can't get into the career I want (whether academia or heritage) and that it's my training contract as such. But it's still a shallow/weird excuse (amongst others no doubt) and I've told him that I refuse to be his friend with benefits whilst he's looking around. It's not like I'm head over heels seeing love hearts and birds singing everywhere with him. Still hurts though.

And I've got a date with someone else next week :biggrin:
(edited 12 years ago)

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