I don't have any food problems now. Thankfully.But I had a brief brush with eating problems. I get teary when I think back.But reading these posts it made me want to sort of vent.
It started at the end of year9 a few on my friends were doing diets and messing up!
I had just got my results for the end of KS3 tests. They were very good! But I didn't feel anything.
So i joined in with the dieting, it sounded very fun. I loved mixing and matching foods and weighing the foods , it was all so wonderful.
I didn't really care so much about the weight. But it did go down and I did like that. I think I may have initially started it to lose some weight but the food arranging was awesome. It felt so wonderfully simple. And it would never end.
I did have problems, like aches and pains, and feeling my bones poking into me when I was laying down. And it hurt to sit too.And I was cold.
I rememeber the end of year trip. I walked around while my friends had lunch, it felt nice, at the end of the day I had a really bad headache and was very hungary but I couldnt ask anyone to make anything for me because I had to weigh it. And I was too tired for calculations.
My mum got worried, kept tellingmy dad but he said I was just being healthy ( my family is mainly obese/overweight) but I lost my periods and asian parents are obsessed with girls' fertility.
Around that time , I remember the first time i got scared. I saw in the bathroom mirror, I could see my ribs, it freaked me out , but I couldnt stop.
My dad eventually forced me to go to the doc, he got really mad at me and forced me to eat. I was heartbroken. I still haven't gotten over that I think. Eventhough it was probably for the best.
All that was within about 3 months. After that I started binging and i couldnt do anything else with food. I was so angry so sad.
In the years that followed It was just a mix of mainly binging and abit of dieting ,i was strictly monitered by my parents and it killed me when they told me what to do so I just decided to eat properly so I dont have to hear it.
Alot of depression that shakes me up when I get into talking about it , I wanted to disappear alot, and tried to make me disappear too.
I'm much better now. I never thought I'd be able to eat without thinking about the calories or my weight or just thinking at all! And its possible!!!!!!
I'm on a diet now, ironicly, need to take precautions.