Lining up in the corridor waiting for class, when a boy tries to punch me in the chest, for no reason, I block him and kick him away, another boy gets my deputy head of year and says I kicked him for no reason, I explain what happened, she says he was probably just doing it playfully (he tried to punch in the chest FFS) and that in future "I should Communicate to prevent further Tension", so I'm basically meant to say "Sorry dear, looks like my chest got in the way of your first". I'm still angry, 3 months on.
Also, last year in Maths, our teacher taught us a neumonic to help with trigonometry.
Sex On Holiday Can Actually Harm The Old Anus (she didn't say the last word - she asked us to work it out for ourselves, but it was very obvious)