The Student Room Group

Life sucks as an ugly guy!

Anon/delete please

Typical story, 24, never had a girlfriend, never been on a date etc.

All my life girls have never been interested in me because of the way I look. I have never had a single girl flirt with me whatsoever even at uni. I have friends and I do go on nights out but still have never had a girl interested in me. I just feel invisible to girls. I have approached girls but it has never went well. They just look away in disgust or politely let me down. No girls wants to hang around with me either. Even as friends. I am confident, I be myself, I say what I like, I have a sense of humour, I am not an overly nice guy, I am polite, I have fun but still it doesn't seem to attract the girls. Maybe its because I'm not cool enough or handsome enough...

I just feel as though girls will always choose the good looking guys because they have the opportunity to pick and choose from the guys that approach them. A lot of girls these days just are too shallow (boys too). Even the ugly girls reject me and often get with the good looking guys (sometimes even when they know that these guys are just after sex).

I have a mate who is considered really good looking. He gets preferential treatment wherever he goes. I know its not his fault but it just sickens me the way these girls fall at his feet only because of his looks.

Sometimes I consider visiting prostitutes. Sometimes I consider taking my life. I try and focus my attention of doing other things rather than just thinking about girls but the loneliness just eats me up inside. Especially when it seems like every girl these days has a boyfriend/f buddy. I also hate seeing couples because that also eats me up inside.

I know there are people living worse lives than me in this world but it seems that in this country there are only a minority that are like me. Nearly everyone has had a relationship, had one night stands, go to parties, meet members of the opposite sex etc. but not me. I feel ostracised, shunned, laughed at...almost like a monster. Why does life have to be like this?

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1
How confident are you in yourself? Do you know what you want in life?
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
Anon/delete please

Typical story, 24, never had a girlfriend, never been on a date etc.

All my life girls have never been interested in me because of the way I look. I have never had a single girl flirt with me whatsoever even at uni. I have friends and I do go on nights out but still have never had a girl interested in me. I just feel invisible to girls. I have approached girls but it has never went well. They just look away in disgust or politely let me down. No girls wants to hang around with me either. Even as friends. I am confident, I be myself, I say what I like, I have a sense of humour, I am not an overly nice guy, I am polite, I have fun but still it doesn't seem to attract the girls. Maybe its because I'm not cool enough or handsome enough...

I just feel as though girls will always choose the good looking guys because they have the opportunity to pick and choose from the guys that approach them. A lot of girls these days just are too shallow (boys too). Even the ugly girls reject me and often get with the good looking guys (sometimes even when they know that these guys are just after sex).

I have a mate who is considered really good looking. He gets preferential treatment wherever he goes. I know its not his fault but it just sickens me the way these girls fall at his feet only because of his looks.

Sometimes I consider visiting prostitutes. Sometimes I consider taking my life. I try and focus my attention of doing other things rather than just thinking about girls but the loneliness just eats me up inside. Especially when it seems like every girl these days has a boyfriend/f buddy. I also hate seeing couples because that also eats me up inside.

I know there are people living worse lives than me in this world but it seems that in this country there are only a minority that are like me. Nearly everyone has had a relationship, had one night stands, go to parties, meet members of the opposite sex etc. but not me. I feel ostracised, shunned, laughed at...almost like a monster. Why does life have to be like this?


Yup unfortunately c'est la vie, girls do like good looking guys, I wouldnt say Im unfortunate but its no coincidence that the better looking men get the most girls. If you want a hooker, get one, just do what you want in life and try not to worry about women, a lot of them complicate men's lives. Get hobbies and try and have fun, hopefully one will come along one day
Reply 3
I bet that guys who are looking good, still have others issues, like maybe not the "fit in" personality, maybe not economically secure, maybe not independent. Have you really not seen any guy who is not good looking but with more than one girl on his arms ?

well, if you have seen that, believe me, you can groom your image to look better, but make sure you work on the other aspects. Women are not as much concerned about a guy's image, as guys are attracted by visual images. And life is not mainly about girls, become a happy man first!
Maybe consider moving if you find this is not your place!
Reply 5
pics or it didn't happen.
I've found a similar experience. Sometimes if I go and talk to a girl, she seems instantly creeped out and put off, but if someone else goes and does the same thing the girls are very interested. It's only creepy because I'm not very attractive, not because of how I act.

I also find it in friendships. I do have friends that are girls, but they've always been more interested in talking to my other, better looking friends when we're hanging out. And if they're not there, the first thing they ask me is where they are and what they're doing. Not usually interested in talking to me. I seem to be invisible to them a lot of the time.

I too have started to find many girls very shallow. The worst experience I've had is when I asked out a girl, and she said no. Then she found a boyfriend who was much better looking than me but cheated on her several times and treated her like crap. After they broke up, she started moaning about how 'all guys are dicks' and such, even though I really liked her and would never have done that, but I'm not attractive and that's apparently much more important than love and loyalty in a relationship.

So yeah, I can sympathise. I just try and have a great time with my friends though and hopefully I'll meet someone who will judge me for who I am, not what I look like. Hopefully you will too, someday.
Reply 7


The trouble with books such as 'The Game' is, at the end of the day, they give you advice you already know. I haven't read 'The Game' yet, but all of these books written by 'seduction experts' tell you exactly the same thing: get ripped, become rich, be really confident and you'll get girls you meet in a nightclub to sleep with you. However, these 'rules' won't get you a girlfriend.

To save you spending a good £30 on those books, I will give you some free advice on how to get girls:

Become a more interesting person. The more you read or watch on TV, the more you'll be able to talk about

Lose a stone or two. You don't have to look like The Situation to get a girlfriend, but if you look athletic you might get more female attention

Your weekends are for more than watching footy and going down the pub. Find something you really enjoy doing, like swimming or painting. You'll feel better about yourself if you do something you enjoy, and if it's a group activity, you might find the girl of your dreams there :smile: (FYI, a mate of mine, who's no oil painting, met his GF through the university's caving soc)


I think you just need to wait for the right girl. Not everyone is like that (:
Reply 9
Original post by x-Sophie-x
I think you just need to wait for the right girl. Not everyone is like that (:


I'm sick and tired of waiting. It seems like she will never come as most people these days (girls especially) are really shallow and dont want to be seen with an ugly boyfriend no matter how kind hearted or loving he is.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm sick and tired of waiting. It seems like she will never come as most people these days (girls especially) are really shallow and dont want to be seen with an ugly boyfriend no matter how kind hearted or loving he is.


I guess being 24, you have been waiting a while but that really is not the case.
Obviously the girl would have to be physically attracted to you, but you don't have to be amazingly good looking for a girl to have a relationship with you.
Reply 11
Original post by Anonymous
I'm sick and tired of waiting. It seems like she will never come as most people these days (girls especially) are really shallow and dont want to be seen with an ugly boyfriend no matter how kind hearted or loving he is.


grovelling isnt going to help is it you muppet!!
firstly, you should realise that attractive people can face the same issues as you, so blaming it on looks is a little silly, especially if you're not targeting shallow girls

secondly, are you sure that you don't just need some charisma?
..let your personality overpower whatever insecurities you have.. if you look like a pig, accept it and embrace it ..learn to love yourself

also what makes you think that you're ugly in the first place? ..if you just have a strange/unconventional face/body it doesn't necessarily mean you're ugly ..maybe you just need to change your style a little.. if you're still conscious of your face then maybe grow a nicely shaped beard, or wear some chunky glasses, become quirky
Reply 13
Original post by Anonymous
x


I hear you OP.

Sometimes I get *that look* from girls. I've been called good looking many times before and I do get away with alot more than some of my mates because girls think I'm better looking.

Despite the many, many opportunities I've had I've failed every single time and I've only had one relationship that lasted barely 3 months. Good looking people have issues of their own and it's not some kind of free ticket to success in dating like some people seem to think.
It sucks to be an ugly person, full stop. Yesterday I was stared at and laughed at by a bunch of people, it really broke me down. It never used to be like this for me. I'm a girl by the way. Anyway I used to be slimmer that I am now and I got a lot of complement about my looks, but I've since ballooned to a size sixteen and I'm 5'11 so you can imagine how seriously chubby I am. I get the odd few men still interested (just like any other ugly girls) but I've since experienced being laughed at by strangers and it's horrific and soul destroying. I get stared at and laughed at sometimes nd it hurts.

I'm vowing to starve myself over the holidays so I can go back to being consider attractive, because being a fat laughing stock is killing me. I hate the way I look right now.
I think that the main issue here is confidence. If you're confident and charming, I genuinely believe you can get a lot of girls. They'll find you and your appearance more attractive as a knock on.

And really, I doubt you are hideous or anything, no one is, and by knockingyourself down, you won't be doing yourself any favours.

I would suggest getting some new hobbies, and networking. Just talk to a lot of people, women and men, people who you would and wouldn't consider dating. Make news friends, become a social butterfly. The simple act of doing this will expose you to more girls who you could date. You need to get some more experience with talking to people, so you can feel more confident when you're trying to ask a girl out. Girls love confidence, I really believe it is the most attractive attribute for a guy to have. If you can build more of yours up, I really think that you'd have more female attention without even having to chat up girls, they'll be more drawn to you naturally.

Self worth comes from within, you need to stop being so hard on ourself and start looking for the good. If you're comfortable with yourself then people will take notice. And if you think you can work on your appearance, than do something about it. Go to the gym, join a sports club, you'll feel better about yourself and others will take notice.

Also, if you meet a girl you like, please, avoid the friend zone at all costs, don't be an arse, but be a little mysterious and flirty (in a non aggressive way though, common mistake) and witty.

Good luck! :smile:
Reply 16
one of the most sexy things for me is confidence...you keep saying that girls aren't flirting with you but thats probably because you aren't approaching them. a lot of girls i know are pretty shy, and won't approach guys (unless they're drunk :tongue: ), but feel flattered even when the least attractive guy comes onto them. so seriously, be brave and make the first move :biggrin:
Reply 17
When you know you know, you know? It's not all down to looks, some girls just dig different looks man; I'm sure even a guy that would be considered perfect looking might not get a look in with certain girls.

You just notice it man, maybe you're not looking for the signs, catch a girl looking at you from across a group of people or whatever. Hang in there man, it'll come.
Reply 18
Original post by Anonymous
Anon/delete please

Typical story, 24, never had a girlfriend, never been on a date etc.

All my life girls have never been interested in me because of the way I look. I have never had a single girl flirt with me whatsoever even at uni. I have friends and I do go on nights out but still have never had a girl interested in me. I just feel invisible to girls. I have approached girls but it has never went well. They just look away in disgust or politely let me down. No girls wants to hang around with me either. Even as friends. I am confident, I be myself, I say what I like, I have a sense of humour, I am not an overly nice guy, I am polite, I have fun but still it doesn't seem to attract the girls. Maybe its because I'm not cool enough or handsome enough...

I just feel as though girls will always choose the good looking guys because they have the opportunity to pick and choose from the guys that approach them. A lot of girls these days just are too shallow (boys too). Even the ugly girls reject me and often get with the good looking guys (sometimes even when they know that these guys are just after sex).

I have a mate who is considered really good looking. He gets preferential treatment wherever he goes. I know its not his fault but it just sickens me the way these girls fall at his feet only because of his looks.

Sometimes I consider visiting prostitutes. Sometimes I consider taking my life. I try and focus my attention of doing other things rather than just thinking about girls but the loneliness just eats me up inside. Especially when it seems like every girl these days has a boyfriend/f buddy. I also hate seeing couples because that also eats me up inside.

I know there are people living worse lives than me in this world but it seems that in this country there are only a minority that are like me. Nearly everyone has had a relationship, had one night stands, go to parties, meet members of the opposite sex etc. but not me. I feel ostracised, shunned, laughed at...almost like a monster. Why does life have to be like this?


Get buff.
Reply 19
Original post by Dark Horse
I hear you OP.

Sometimes I get *that look* from girls. I've been called good looking many times before and I do get away with alot more than some of my mates because girls think I'm better looking.

Despite the many, many opportunities I've had I've failed every single time and I've only had one relationship that lasted barely 3 months. Good looking people have issues of their own and it's not some kind of free ticket to success in dating like some people seem to think.


Very true. I know some good looking guys who pretty much never get laid. Sure looks greatly help, but they don't guarantee you anything. All else being equal, if an average guy approached girls a lot more than a good looking guy, he would have much more success.

OP: Seriously, ANYONE can find a girl. I've seen ugly guys, creepy as hell guys, anorexic guys, midgets, morbidly obese guys and more get girlfriends. Sometimes attractive ones at that. If those guys can do it then you can too. The only guys who don't get laid in this world are the guys that don't hit on enough girls.

Latest

Trending

Trending