Anxiety experiences and support
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Nah I don't mind being called cute when it's someone I know is older 
And I know what you mean, I have what I'm going to say planned out in my head but then I keep on thinking things like 'what if they get offended?' I have a very dry sense of humour which isn't always appreciated. Some of my friends are stupidly confident though, for example one went up to a random guy and was like to him 'How much does a polar bear weigh?... Enough to break the ice' then she introduced herself while I stood there just listening to my ipod.
And I talk to most people in my year but some are just annoying, and I know what you mean, if a shopkeeper is really nice to me or strikes up a conversation I just feel good because it's like they've bothered to talk to me and at my work I do my best to be nice and smiley to all the customers but some I just want to throttle, especially when they start complaining that the bread's not cooked and then shout at me, it's hardly my fault :P
And you don't sound pathetic, and I know this sounds stupid because talking online is a hell of a lot easier than in person but you're very easy to talk to in my opinion
And I know what you mean, I have what I'm going to say planned out in my head but then I keep on thinking things like 'what if they get offended?' I have a very dry sense of humour which isn't always appreciated. Some of my friends are stupidly confident though, for example one went up to a random guy and was like to him 'How much does a polar bear weigh?... Enough to break the ice' then she introduced herself while I stood there just listening to my ipod. And I talk to most people in my year but some are just annoying, and I know what you mean, if a shopkeeper is really nice to me or strikes up a conversation I just feel good because it's like they've bothered to talk to me and at my work I do my best to be nice and smiley to all the customers but some I just want to throttle, especially when they start complaining that the bread's not cooked and then shout at me, it's hardly my fault :P
And you don't sound pathetic, and I know this sounds stupid because talking online is a hell of a lot easier than in person but you're very easy to talk to in my opinion
Hello everyone,
I've decided I'm getting off TSR. It may be permanent or temporary - I might be back in a few weeks, or maybe never. I just thought I'd pop in here and let people know.
I've decided I'm getting off TSR. It may be permanent or temporary - I might be back in a few weeks, or maybe never. I just thought I'd pop in here and let people know.
Original post by Amwazicles
Hello everyone,
I've decided I'm getting off TSR. It may be permanent or temporary - I might be back in a few weeks, or maybe never. I just thought I'd pop in here and let people know.
I've decided I'm getting off TSR. It may be permanent or temporary - I might be back in a few weeks, or maybe never. I just thought I'd pop in here and let people know.
Why? (You don't have to tell, but I hope it is only something like learning or so and nothing serious.)
Original post by Nathanielle
Why? (You don't have to tell, but I hope it is only something like learning or so and nothing serious.)
Nothing serious. I think this weekend I have had some kind of general epiphany about my life, and I want to try and make myself start living a bit more. I find TSR keeps me distracted and procrastinating a lot, and I don't think it is good for me anymore. It definitely was when I first came, because I used this thread a lot more and feel like I benefited in various ways. But I don't think I need it anymore. Also more practical stuff, in that I'm at college and my workload is only going to get heavier, for the forseeable future. So like I said, I may come back, or I may not.
Until next time!
Original post by Amwazicles
Nothing serious. I think this weekend I have had some kind of general epiphany about my life, and I want to try and make myself start living a bit more. I find TSR keeps me distracted and procrastinating a lot, and I don't think it is good for me anymore. It definitely was when I first came, because I used this thread a lot more and feel like I benefited in various ways. But I don't think I need it anymore. Also more practical stuff, in that I'm at college and my workload is only going to get heavier, for the forseeable future. So like I said, I may come back, or I may not.
Until next time!
Until next time!
Yeah, valid reason...
Original post by Nathanielle
Yeah, valid reason...
Was that sarcasm?
Never even knew this thread was here....
Recently I've started to have some issues. I've started to become very fearful about going to school. It's even worse when I have to go to the sixthform study, because it's always full of people and noisy and dark and as soon I step in the door of the place I feel panicked and overwhelmed. It's always difficult to get a seat and my friends always sit down the back, but I don't like sitting there because it's too far away from the door and I feel I need to be able to leave quickly if I want to, so I end up sitting at the front. It's such a pathetic, irrational, minor thing, but it makes me hate school and it's interfering with my work. I dropped a subject last year so now I have lots of free lessons (last year I only had three), and it's just been getting worse and worse, to the point where I feel like crying every morning before going to school. I had an eating disorder and social anxiety when I was younger, thought I had put them to rest but they've clawed their way back; the social side I cope with by drinking alcohol (which has led to me doing a lot of irresponsible things, which just makes me feel worse), the eating disorder is just destroying me. Furthermore, my father, whom I haven't spoken to in nearly a year (he was an emotionally abusive bully when I was growing up, and unsurprisingly most of that focused around my eating and my difficulty making friends), keeps coming to our house - he's separated from my mother and she doesn't want him here, but because he wants to see my brother she feels like she can't turn him away. Everytime he comes I feel the panic returning and I just want to go and hide in my room, but I can't because I have to do things in the rest of the house, but he just takes it over and acts like he owns the house, demanding that we make him food etc. It makes my blood boil. So basically I'm not coping well with any of it, and it's such pathetic and minor things, and whenever I talk to anyone about the stress they automatically assume that it's due to academic pressure from school, when in reality it has nothing to do with that. Don't really know what I can do, I don't think anything's really bad enough to meet any diagnostic criteria, bar the eating disorder, which has been ongoing for 7 years now. would really appreciate any suggestions of advice for ways of coping with this, so far I've just been taking herbal calming remedies and staying in at the weekend (really worried that my drinking is going to turn into a problem, been using it as a crutch and i don't want alcoholism to ruin my life).
Recently I've started to have some issues. I've started to become very fearful about going to school. It's even worse when I have to go to the sixthform study, because it's always full of people and noisy and dark and as soon I step in the door of the place I feel panicked and overwhelmed. It's always difficult to get a seat and my friends always sit down the back, but I don't like sitting there because it's too far away from the door and I feel I need to be able to leave quickly if I want to, so I end up sitting at the front. It's such a pathetic, irrational, minor thing, but it makes me hate school and it's interfering with my work. I dropped a subject last year so now I have lots of free lessons (last year I only had three), and it's just been getting worse and worse, to the point where I feel like crying every morning before going to school. I had an eating disorder and social anxiety when I was younger, thought I had put them to rest but they've clawed their way back; the social side I cope with by drinking alcohol (which has led to me doing a lot of irresponsible things, which just makes me feel worse), the eating disorder is just destroying me. Furthermore, my father, whom I haven't spoken to in nearly a year (he was an emotionally abusive bully when I was growing up, and unsurprisingly most of that focused around my eating and my difficulty making friends), keeps coming to our house - he's separated from my mother and she doesn't want him here, but because he wants to see my brother she feels like she can't turn him away. Everytime he comes I feel the panic returning and I just want to go and hide in my room, but I can't because I have to do things in the rest of the house, but he just takes it over and acts like he owns the house, demanding that we make him food etc. It makes my blood boil. So basically I'm not coping well with any of it, and it's such pathetic and minor things, and whenever I talk to anyone about the stress they automatically assume that it's due to academic pressure from school, when in reality it has nothing to do with that. Don't really know what I can do, I don't think anything's really bad enough to meet any diagnostic criteria, bar the eating disorder, which has been ongoing for 7 years now. would really appreciate any suggestions of advice for ways of coping with this, so far I've just been taking herbal calming remedies and staying in at the weekend (really worried that my drinking is going to turn into a problem, been using it as a crutch and i don't want alcoholism to ruin my life).
I'm beginning to worry that I may have some type of anxiety disorder. It may be the fact that I've been trying to sleep for four hours now and still haven't managed it that's driving me slightly insane. I'm not sure how I can tell whether how I'm feeling is down to an actual condition or if I'm just horribly stressed. I don't know how much longer I can cope like this though. 
Well, are there reasons to be horribly stressed? Have you already tried something out to sleep more?
Has anyone here had experiences with agoraphobia? I would say it affects me only in specific circumstances as I'm fine in my day to day life but I get so panicked and anxious if I have to go travel on my own to somewhere I don't know well or staying somewhere overnight away from my family. Since I want to go off to uni and live in halls in september I really need to sort this out asap. Already tried CBT, in the middle of trying hypnotherapy and gradual exposure therapy but nothing has helped so far. Just wondering whether I should be thinking about medication.... Already have diazepam but am reluctant to use it..
Any advice would be appreciated
Any advice would be appreciated
Has anyone here had experiences with agoraphobia? I would say it affects me only in specific circumstances as I'm fine in my day to day life but I get so panicked and anxious if I have to go travel on my own to somewhere I don't know well or staying somewhere overnight away from my family. Since I want to go off to uni and live in halls in september I really need to sort this out asap. Already tried CBT, in the middle of trying hypnotherapy and gradual exposure therapy but nothing has helped so far. Just wondering whether I should be thinking about medication.... Already have diazepam but am reluctant to use it..
Any advice would be appreciated
Any advice would be appreciated
It's truly so much of a relief to see an anxiety support group here on TSR.
Tomorrow, I'm going to go get diagnosed.
Here's my story, if you can bother to read it - it's a short one.
Tomorrow, I'm going to go get diagnosed.
Here's my story, if you can bother to read it - it's a short one.
Spoiler
Original post by mikeylfc1989
Yeah, it really helps with the 'everybody is looking at me' feeling.
I'm usually quite relaxed at that point too, but I just start to drift off a bit. I think it's more down to tiredness than anything else. If I'm going out, I usually spend the whole day running it through in my head. Even if I'm not necessarily nervous about going. Also, it could be the people I usually hang out with. Oddly, I seem to be the one who carries the conversations. Either me, or one of my friends who is extremely pessimistic, seems to bring everyone down...
I'm not even sure if I am that introverted tbh, I love playing sports, listening to live music. Just happens that my anxiety works against me doing those things.
I need more extroverted, positive people to hang round with. <3
I'm completely fine with people who are laid back and relatively enthusiastic. Relaxes me straight away and I don't feel I need to force any conversation.
Yup, I get that, relief when you get home.
I don't know if you already do this, but I take my iPod everywhere, I don't leave the house without it. Does help, a lot.
I'm usually quite relaxed at that point too, but I just start to drift off a bit. I think it's more down to tiredness than anything else. If I'm going out, I usually spend the whole day running it through in my head. Even if I'm not necessarily nervous about going. Also, it could be the people I usually hang out with. Oddly, I seem to be the one who carries the conversations. Either me, or one of my friends who is extremely pessimistic, seems to bring everyone down...
I'm not even sure if I am that introverted tbh, I love playing sports, listening to live music. Just happens that my anxiety works against me doing those things.
I need more extroverted, positive people to hang round with. <3
I'm completely fine with people who are laid back and relatively enthusiastic. Relaxes me straight away and I don't feel I need to force any conversation.
Yup, I get that, relief when you get home.
I don't know if you already do this, but I take my iPod everywhere, I don't leave the house without it. Does help, a lot.
Hm, so quieter people will make you feel more anxious - maybe more pressure is put on you to socialise. Seems like your having a lot of little negative experiences with socialising with your friends. No motivation to keep talking etc...
I don't usually listen to my ipod while walking. I would like to, just really paranoid about not hearing a car or something. Like to hear things going on around me. But I see how the music would help me be in my own little bubble and safe away from people.
I find extroverted people intimidating, but if I work to feel comfortable enough around them and they seem accepting of me, they would be far better to hang around with than introverted or quiet or even insecure people. Probably rub off their relaxed and confident nature.
Original post by mikeylfc1989
Yup, that's pretty much it. It's very noticeable when I go quiet in my group, I can't just blend in and listen to the conversation...
When I say extroverted, I don't mean the loud, in your face type. More, confident in social situations, socially intelligent and laid back. Just people who don't feel the need to push conversation or feel awkward during silences, show enthusiasm about what they are saying but also, the person they are talking to. It does rub off on me, if I'm around those people. Probably makes no sense, but yeah, that's how would I describe those magical people.
Couldn't think of anything worse than the stereotypical loud, extrovert tbh.
When I say extroverted, I don't mean the loud, in your face type. More, confident in social situations, socially intelligent and laid back. Just people who don't feel the need to push conversation or feel awkward during silences, show enthusiasm about what they are saying but also, the person they are talking to. It does rub off on me, if I'm around those people. Probably makes no sense, but yeah, that's how would I describe those magical people.
Couldn't think of anything worse than the stereotypical loud, extrovert tbh.
I see what you mean
What happens if you just go don't talk in your groups of friends then, would you all sit in silence? Would they expect you to entertain them or say something? Maybe they're really insecure themselves and have no idea how to interact, so rely on you. Then that probably makes you more conscious of what you are saying and more anxious. While the secure confident people you're talking about would just go with the flow and not focus too much on you.
Sorry for trying to analyse - just interesting
Original post by Nathanielle
Well, are there reasons to be horribly stressed? Have you already tried something out to sleep more?
I'd rather remain anonymous so I don't want to go into too much detail but yes, there are some reasons why I've been stressed - a couple of months ago I was made temporarily homeless
But that was a while ago now and it feels like this is a much bigger issue than just that. I've been trying basic remedies found on the internet, in terms of tips to cure insomnia - I don't want to take medication really - I have some sleeping tablets but really, really don't want to take them.
I started uni in September and since being here have felt more anxious than ever before. I now find it hard to even go to the local shop on my own as I feel a bit paranoid, when Im with people its fine but I dont have many friends here and dont see my boyfriend as much as I would like.
Other problem is my boyfriend is quite a confident, laid back person and I think he would rather I was more confident for my own sake, it would make hanging out with his friends who are my future housemates much easier too.
Need to get to know them but find it hard and never really talk...
As hard as it seemed I wish I had gotten more involved in freshers week as I might have developed more connection so had more friends by now but cant be helped now.
Other problem is my boyfriend is quite a confident, laid back person and I think he would rather I was more confident for my own sake, it would make hanging out with his friends who are my future housemates much easier too.
Need to get to know them but find it hard and never really talk...
As hard as it seemed I wish I had gotten more involved in freshers week as I might have developed more connection so had more friends by now but cant be helped now.
Everyone, I am really struggling and I don't know what the next step is going to be and I'm terrified. This afternoon I've come down with a gastro bug and have been living in the bathroom today, which has only exacerbated my anxiety even more. I got so wound up that I ended up telling my mum just how down I was feeling and that I just wanted to give up and I don't see any reason to live besides them, and her response was to say that she wants the name and number of my counsellor and she's ringing him first thing on monday morning. Whats going to happen? Whats he going to say? Whats he going to do? I'm terrified.
Original post by mikeylfc1989
Creepy...
Not always, but yeah, it does happen quite often. Start to feel they are getting bored and not want to meet up again. I don't think it's insecurity, for them, there's just no natural extrovert in the group. It isn't as bad I'm making out either, it's just brief periods where everyone fall silent. I just get overly stressed out about it. I find it easier to join in conversations and bounce off other peoples' comments rather than direct it, especially when people seem bored.
And yeah, last part is completely true.
Help me, anon?
Not always, but yeah, it does happen quite often. Start to feel they are getting bored and not want to meet up again. I don't think it's insecurity, for them, there's just no natural extrovert in the group. It isn't as bad I'm making out either, it's just brief periods where everyone fall silent. I just get overly stressed out about it. I find it easier to join in conversations and bounce off other peoples' comments rather than direct it, especially when people seem bored.
And yeah, last part is completely true.
Help me, anon?
Haha
No clue how to help
But usually the more you do stuff your anxious about, the less scary they feel. Unless you are repeatedly having an awful experience. Had a night similar to yours last night. Just a few quiet friends in a place where we didn't know anyone but had to stay for a party. I over-talked. Saying all sorts of crap to hide how anxious I was. I kept over-smiling too. Whole thing was extremely uncomfortable... Conversation kept drying up, and we all looked quite pathetic sitting there in silence :\
Original post by Anonymous
I started uni in September and since being here have felt more anxious than ever before. I now find it hard to even go to the local shop on my own as I feel a bit paranoid, when Im with people its fine but I dont have many friends here and dont see my boyfriend as much as I would like.
Other problem is my boyfriend is quite a confident, laid back person and I think he would rather I was more confident for my own sake, it would make hanging out with his friends who are my future housemates much easier too.
Need to get to know them but find it hard and never really talk...
As hard as it seemed I wish I had gotten more involved in freshers week as I might have developed more connection so had more friends by now but cant be helped now.
Other problem is my boyfriend is quite a confident, laid back person and I think he would rather I was more confident for my own sake, it would make hanging out with his friends who are my future housemates much easier too.
Need to get to know them but find it hard and never really talk...
As hard as it seemed I wish I had gotten more involved in freshers week as I might have developed more connection so had more friends by now but cant be helped now.
Everyone is still finding their feet, and anxious when starting uni. Especially the independent side of things. You'll be walking to places on your own a lot anyway, people find this difficult when used to being with friends, having them to feel confident with, then going by themselves, they're more ware of themselves and how others are perceiving them. Practicing these situations helps you relax more - you will begin to ignore people, may even prefer some alone time to get things at the shop. As with the boyfriend's friends, you don't need to feel forced to put on confidence for their benefit, I'd say you'll learn to settle since you'll be living with them. Try to act relaxed and natural, be friendly, no need to force yourself on them, or try to be someone you're not. Laugh at their jokes etc. Nothing wrong with being quiet at first.
Original post by insignificant
Everyone, I am really struggling and I don't know what the next step is going to be and I'm terrified. This afternoon I've come down with a gastro bug and have been living in the bathroom today, which has only exacerbated my anxiety even more. I got so wound up that I ended up telling my mum just how down I was feeling and that I just wanted to give up and I don't see any reason to live besides them, and her response was to say that she wants the name and number of my counsellor and she's ringing him first thing on monday morning. Whats going to happen? Whats he going to say? Whats he going to do? I'm terrified.
Sounds like you're having a particular low point. Just open up and tell him how you feel - look after yourself.
I'm really not having a good time.. had food poisoning all weekend.. fell down the stairs this morning and I've got a tooth infection and the antibiotics are making me feel like crap.
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