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Depression Society MKV

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It's like people are perfectly happy to talk to me when I'm feeling down about myself but if I bring up my dad it gets awkward :s-smilie:

Do you find that you feel low about everything and not just the loss of your mum? I feel so low in self-esteem sometimes that I just want to die (not in a worrying way - I'm not going to kill myself! It's just I wouldn't mind if I was killed at that point). And then I feel guilty because I should just be sad about my dad and not about all these stupid teenager things as well. And I can't express myself to people at all. I can't talk about my feelings :/ I asked the vice head of year about counselling and I think I've been put on the waiting list. Everyone's happy to talk about how I'm keeping up with work, how is my mum, how is my sister but it's so frustrating because I can't tell them about me.

I don't feel low about everything at the moment, I'm going through a good phase at the moment, but I definitely know what you mean. I was depressed for quite a long time when I was younger anyway, and then I went through a few weeks in October where it was just everything getting me down again - low about myself, felt like I wasn't good at anything, couldn't cope with anything, everything with my mum as well and it all just builds up and builds up. And the same with what you said about the wanting to die - not being suicidal but not caring if you died, I felt exactly like that too.

You don't have to just be sad about your dad though. I know the grief takes over everything, but you're still you, there's still parts of your life that are important to you without being about your dad (even if it doesn't seem so important at the moment). So you've still got those other worries and stresses about 'normal' teenage things too, it's just there's all the grief as well as all that (so no wonder things are so difficult!)

It's good that you're on the waiting list for counselling now. You need to talk about yourself and how you're feeling too, it feels like such a weight is lifted when you can do it. There are helplines etc if that's ever an option for you? I've only done it once because I hate talking on the phone and I felt a bit awkward, but there is a specific support helpline for young people so if you do want to, I'll have a look for the number if you like). But it's fine if you don't want to, 'cos like I said, I hate phones!

x

Reply 2661

kka25

Original post by bullettheory

I'm sorry I am posting. Again.

Spoiler

I'm here!

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 2662

kka25

Original post by Nut.

Spoiler

Reply 2663

username861942

Original post by Anonymous

Want to talk about it?

Original post by Nut.

Spoiler

Reply 2664

lifeguardsleeping

I'm making a GP appt and I'm scared!

Reply 2665

kka25

Original post by lifeguardsleeping

I'm making a GP appt and I'm scared!

Don't worry. Hopefully everything would turn out alright.

Cool username! :biggrin:

nice one

Original post by kka25

Don't worry. Hopefully everything would turn out alright.

Cool username! :biggrin:

My iPad's all set up now, and I was right - tis awesome :yes:

Written from my iPad :tongue:

Reply 2668

username861942

Original post by ViceVersa

My iPad's all set up now, and I was right - tis awesome :yes:

Written from my iPad :tongue:

Ipads are sick.

Spoiler

Original post by bullettheory

Spoiler

I feel like that, well I did the other day. Right now I'm okish (still feel pointless but not in pain) but know the feeling will be coming back soon.
Is there anyone in/who was in your life that you wished you could talk to?
Sorry I'm new here if you've been through this before.

Reply 2671

ViceVersa

Original post by bullettheory

Ipads are sick.

You. Are. Cool.

Reply 2672

kka25

Went to a restaurant just now and felt so low :frown:

Then I started getting teary and tried to hide it from the waiter :cry2:

Started to walk back home and my eyes were getting more and more teary :cry2:

Tried to find some alley and I just burst into tears :cry:

Reply 2673

Saffie

Original post by kka25

I went out and felt crap too.
And some random bloke told me to cheer up. :mad:

Reply 2674

littleshambles

Original post by kka25

Went to a restaurant just now and felt so low :frown:

Then I started getting teary and tried to hide it from the waiter :cry2:

Started to walk back home and my eyes were getting more and more teary :cry2:

Tried to find some alley and I just burst into tears :cry:

been there! spent all night in a club sitting on the floor in the corner crying once. :moon:

I hope you're ok.

Reply 2675

SciFiRory

I failed. again. fml. :cry2:

Reply 2676

Anonymous #40

Today was...a little more bearable.. :redface:

Reply 2677

MedicineStuudent

My only wish is that I die real.

Reply 2678

Anonymous #35

*Sigh*
What a painful existence today. ;(
Getting to close to do something I shouldn't /:

Reply 2679

CherryCherryBoomBoom

Original post by kka25

Went to a restaurant just now and felt so low :frown:

Then I started getting teary and tried to hide it from the waiter :cry2:

Started to walk back home and my eyes were getting more and more teary :cry2:

Tried to find some alley and I just burst into tears :cry:

Just relax now :smile:

Original post by Saffie

I went out and felt crap too.
And some random bloke told me to cheer up. :mad:

I've had that happen to me too! I wasn't crying or anything, but I must have just been walking along looking really glum (and I was actually feeling down tbh) cos some random guy in the street said to me "Cheer up love" :o: