[Anonymous]

I'm hopelessly attracted to this girl but there is no way for me to ever have her. This obsession has completely taken over my life, I've become depressed and can hardly function anymore.

Has anyone experienced this? Are there any antidepressants or other meds that are capable of numbing and suppressing strong feelings of infatuation/love?

[Irrelevance]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm hopelessly attracted to this girl but there is no way for me to ever have her. This obsession has completely taken over my life, I've become depressed and can hardly function anymore.

Has anyone experienced this? Are there any antidepressants or other meds that are capable of numbing and suppressing strong feelings of infatuation/love?

Curious question, how is attraction hopeless and entirely impossible?

[F Ellen]

Anti-depressants aren't smarties, they're powerful psychoactive substances. You can't just shovel them down your gullet because you fancy someone.

[abc101]

Nope. Sometimes, particularly when you first start taking them, anti-depressants can numb your feelings, so you still feel depressed, but kind of detached, but that doesn't last long. I've found my obsessiveness over the person I can't have has actually got worse since I've been on ADs - sometimes ADs do make you more obsessive, especially if you've already got an obsessive personality.

[Mr Ben]

(Original post by F Ellen)
Anti-depressants aren't smarties, they're powerful psychoactive substances. You can't just shovel them down your gullet because you fancy someone.

Couldn't agree with this more

[lucas13]

no

[CMedical]

Antidepressants pull people out of crippling depression, but do these drugs kill romance? A Digital Journal EXCLUSIVE...
Digital Journal -- The next time the love of your life breaks your heart, don’t drown your sorrows in a bottle of cheap wine. Pop an antidepressant. And then another. Soon enough, the feelings of romantic love will fade away faster than the memories of the first date.

[blacklistmember]

*Bump* So has this worked for anyone?

[Exopaladin]

(Original post by blacklistmember)
*Bump* So has this worked for anyone?

I can't imagine anyone has been stupid enough to try, to be honest. As previously mentioned they can numb your emotions slightly, but you'll still feel for the person (a lot of people don't get this effect to start with and it often goes away). This is in addition to having to deal with fun side effects for no benefit along with probable discontinuation symptoms when you stop them.

[Anonymous]

I'm surprised to see this thread still going!

Drugs did nothing to alleviate my obsession over this particular person, if anything I'm currently even more focused on her than usual, even though she's completely unreceptive. Over the course of a few months I've tried Cipralex, Mirtazapine and Venlafaxine, which I started taking a few days ago. So far none of them have managed to produce any negative or positive effects, not even the slighest side effect.

I've cut all contact with the person recently and I'm currently going through what seems to be love withdrawal. Starting therapy soon as well, hopefully it will get better with time!

[Mchouse]

you should try therapy instead, this is what is going to help you the most i think.

[blacklistmember]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm surprised to see this thread still going!

Drugs did nothing to alleviate my obsession over this particular person, if anything I'm currently even more focused on her than usual, even though she's completely unreceptive. Over the course of a few months I've tried Cipralex, Mirtazapine and Venlafaxine, which I started taking a few days ago. So far none of them have managed to produce any negative or positive effects, not even the slighest side effect.

I've cut all contact with the person recently and I'm currently going through what seems to be love withdrawal. Starting therapy soon as well, hopefully it will get better with time!

I bumped it because i was watching this video on TED and the person happened to mention it

Over 100 million prescriptions of antidepressants are written every year in the United States. And these drugs are going generic. They are seeping around the world. I know one girl who's been on these antidepressants, serotonin-enhancing -- SSRI, serotonin-enhancing antidepressants -- since she was 13. She's 23. She's been on them ever since she was 13.

I've got nothing against people who take them short term, when they're going through something perfectly horrible. They want to commit suicide or kill somebody else. I would recommend it. But more and more people in the United States are taking them long term. And indeed, what these drugs do is raise levels of serotonin. And by raising levels of serotonin, you suppress the dopamine circuit. Everybody knows that. Dopamine is associated with romantic love. Not only do they suppress the dopamine circuit, but they kill the sex drive. And when you kill the sex drive, you kill orgasm. And when you kill orgasm, you kill that flood of drugs associated with attachment. The things are connected in the brain. And when you tamper with one brain system, you're going to tamper with another. I'm just simply saying that a world without love is a deadly place.

[gigi2183]

Anti-depressants can't kill love, but they can kill your sex drive.

You should definitely try talk therapy. It's massively helpful if you find a good therapist that you click with.

[HugoDuchovny]

The only way to "destroy" love is ultimate understanding and de-emotionalizing your situation.

You are a human, and an animal. Like all animals you are bound to feel attraction to the opposite gender. The infatuation is ultimately a result of certain chemical reactions in your brain and body.

You are reacting the way you were genetically programmed to, and this response is not exclusive to this girl. This response will occur repeatedly throughout your life.

There is no cosmic force, or cupid who is drawing you to this female. The songs you listen to whilst thinking about her mean nothing. The sense of "this feels so right, it must be" means nothing. The feeling that this attraction

has taken over control means nothing. These feelings and ideas are a result of human social conditioning, that feelings mean something. All your thoughts in terms of love and infatuation are just, and only just a result of

chemical imbalance.

Understand this.

Forget her.

And study science.

One day in the future, this chemical imbalance will arise again. And will hopefully will be reciprocated with a chemical imbalance for you.

[SuperheroSam]

Lobotomy?

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm surprised to see this thread still going!

Drugs did nothing to alleviate my obsession over this particular person, if anything I'm currently even more focused on her than usual, even though she's completely unreceptive. Over the course of a few months I've tried Cipralex, Mirtazapine and Venlafaxine, which I started taking a few days ago. So far none of them have managed to produce any negative or positive effects, not even the slighest side effect.

I've cut all contact with the person recently and I'm currently going through what seems to be love withdrawal. Starting therapy soon as well, hopefully it will get better with time!

I don't think anti-depressants are really designed to be used for the situation you describe.... although some drugs can help with obsessions or OCD like traits others (in my experience) can actually make them worse.

I'm amazed you have had no side effects whatsoever from the medications you have tried..... most people usually get a few. Venlafaxine / Effexor is often used as a 'second line' treatment after other types of SSRI anti-depressants have failed to work.... and IME it has a horrendus discontiuation syndrome. I would touch it again with a barge pole.

Sounds like you could really use some kind of talking therapy.... perhaps cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) to help you restructure your thoughts in a more positive way.

[memomemootoo]

(Original post by HugoDuchovny)
The only way to "destroy" love is ultimate understanding and de-emotionalizing your situation.

You are a human, and an animal. Like all animals you are bound to feel attraction to the opposite gender. The infatuation is ultimately a result of certain chemical reactions in your brain and body.

You are reacting the way you were genetically programmed to, and this response is not exclusive to this girl. This response will occur repeatedly throughout your life.

There is no cosmic force, or cupid who is drawing you to this female. The songs you listen to whilst thinking about her mean nothing. The sense of "this feels so right, it must be" means nothing. The feeling that this attraction

has taken over control means nothing. These feelings and ideas are a result of human social conditioning, that feelings mean something. All your thoughts in terms of love and infatuation are just, and only just a result of

chemical imbalance.

Understand this.

Forget her.

And study science.

One day in the future, this chemical imbalance will arise again. And will hopefully will be reciprocated with a chemical imbalance for you.

i have a chemical imbalance : |

[Jabberwox]

I agree with HugoDuchovny, if you regard your 'love' as just a scientific chemical reaction, you'd be surprised how you can put things into perspective. Society has beautified 'love' to be the most amazing thing in the world. 'Oh life without love is not worth living' and all those crap cliche sayings, etc. which makes people believe that unrequited love is potentially life-ending. It isn't. You just happen to have an attraction to someone who doesn't feel the same way. Crap happens.

I don't think antidepressants is the answer. It's more sort of gaining a new perspective and filling your life with other things to take your mind off her. It is very hard, but you'll get over it eventually.