[imabigboynow]

I am a 20 year old guy that lives with my mom and 2 sisters. Something happened to me when i was 16 years old (got into a fight and got hurt) and since then my mother has been very protective of me. My mother lost her job 2 years ago and is paying for the house we live in by housing benefits. She is so over protective of me that she wont let me have a social life or stay out late. I explained to her that i am an adult and i should be able to look after myself. But she wont listen or compromise. I go to university and I work part time. If I work more hours, I should be able to move out into a room with room mates.

My mom will be very upset if I move out and i do care about her feelings. But I feel this is the best course of action to take. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? do you have any advice for me on how i can go about this?

thanks a lot

[jeery83]

She needs some help. I don't mean that in a funny way, I'm serious.

What happend to you has traumatised her and shaken her up and she needs to address this. A couple of visits to a psychotherapist would be a good start.

If she won't go that route then you, as an adult, need to be assertive and live your life how you want regardless of your mum's worries. You can't let her insecurities and fears stop you from living your life. Does she think that you should put your social life on hold to after she is dead and doesn't have to worry?

I feel bad for your mum. She needs to sort out her mental issues/insecurities and soon before it gets to deep and eats at her. You need to live your life and do the things you want.

Good luck.

[imabigboynow]

Thanks for the very well thought out response.. +1 rep

[imabigboynow]

bump, anyone got more advice? things are still pretty bad