This is a little awkward to make this post, if it was black and white then i wouldnt be confused but it really isnt. Im 18 just left school and have sometimes been curious and 'explored' the idea of having sex with peers and people around my age (normally younger), but when i do its always me wanting to sodomise the person. I would never want to have any relationship with that person. Also im not attracted to the penis nor have i ever been attracted to men on porn websites. And of course this has all been in my head, ive never told anyone and never acted on any of this or even tried to.
But at the same time my taste in girls has got a lot more specific. Im still attracted to some but probably not as much as a typical straight guy would. I mean i see a pair of jugs and im like wow big deal there everywhere you look these days. Not alone women going round like they're all that. Am i just interested in the thrill of the chase? I really couldnt tell you. The feelings ive started having have suddenly come about in the last year or 2. It has never crossed my mind to be into guys at all. I used to have an ABDL fetish but this has since wayned and was a temporarily period.
Im not a weird guy, I have a number of friends and act like a completely typical straight guy persona. But this is my big skeleton in the closet, i have a warped sex drive it seems. Is this primal urge sexual tension or a domination thing? I could go on forever but im just really confused. Some would say i was a bi, but surely it wouldnt be feasible to have a relationship with very 'specific' desires.
Thanks for any advice, i hope someone 'qualified' can enlighten me