Annoying club guys...

So when a girl dances with me and I want to get out of it, the following responses produce the following results:
"Be right back" = 'I'll come with you!'

"Sorry I'm gay" = Normally leads asking if she can change my mind, followed by molesting me. Classy.

"I have a girlfriend" = Leads to either 'She doesn't have to know' or a pretty uncalled for slap.

*Attempt to Ignore her* = Molesting to get attention

"I think that guy there likes you" = 'Tell him you're my boyfriend'

I have to ask you girls in here, If you go up and dance with a guy, and he isn't interested, is there a right answer for him to give?

I'm ashamed to say the only way I can actually just have a night out with my friends is if I'm nasty to girls, which is why I can understand the OP's situation with that last nice/not nice guy.

but Posh girls accents are awesome

Yes exactly. Well I find that nice guys are harder to reject because they think that I'm playing hard to get when in reality I'm trying to tell them that I'm not interested.

I figured out why people think I'm posh. I have an English accent (I only speak Scots when I'm drunk) and people here think anyone who lives south of, say Newcastle, is exceedingly posh. Oh and I use long sentences etc...

I bumped into the 'nice guy' I mentioned in my anecdote when I was out tonight. He told me he was looking for me on facebook but he couldn't find me to add me, then he asked to kiss me and I said no 'cause that's a funny thing to say as far as I'm concerned. I was actually kind of disturbed by the attention for some reason.

Ahhhhhhh your making me want to go again shall have to when i'm back at xmas and ohh how i've missed the sticky floor

I've managed to lose my shoes to those sticky floors.

Complaining about going to a club and meeting guys like that is like going to mcdonalds and complaining about the quality of food.

Anyone who doesn't agree with py0alb is obviously a closet misogynyst and sexist, and this includes you sir, as well as that darned dgeorge person who posts! How dare you use sarcasm to imply that his posts don't make sense! We should never suggest taking "precautions", but throw these suggestions to the wind, because even though we don't live in a perfect world, we should ACT LIKE IT dammit!

I'm a local (but not Dundonian)

Been to Dundee gay club though which I absolutely loved because I got to be so anon. and hang out with my gay best friend.

So would you say that if women went out to a club without a male chaperone, they're at least partly to blame if they get felt up by a strange guy?

After all, they should have followed your advice, shouldn't they? They're basically asking for it, aren't they George?

No. Poor analogy. The motivation behind going to McDonalds is the food itself, whereas the motivation behind going to a club isn’t (necessarily) to get with someone. And even if some people do go to a club looking for someone to hook up with, they still have the right to be upset if they get treated badly.

No offence, but I think you’re being unnecessarily rude here. Py0alb and Lucia both agreed with you, they just pointed out the holes in your suggestion and offered a better alternative (you stated yourself that it wasn’t the best one). Of course every sensible person will take necessary precautions, but that doesn’t eliminate the problem. I’m not going to go too much into it because they have both already given you very well written responses explaining their reasoning. In your argument you do essentially imply that such behavior is acceptable by shifting the responsibility to the victim. That’s like treating the symptoms instead of the cause. I know that the world will never be an ideal place, but there’s nothing wrong with trying to improve it.

Last time I went out clubbing it was because I wanted to enjoy the live music act and have a good time with friends, majority of which were guys. The club I went to is not the usual sleazy student-y type of club at all. I was wearing trainers, jeans, and a t shirt (the jeans weren’t even skinny and the t-shirt had no cleavage at all, it had a cartoon print on it ffs). I consciously avoided making eye contact with anyone else but my friends, just so that no one would think I’m sending any signals. Yet I still got groped by two guys in one night, one of which was the old dude I mentioned in my first post. So what next, are you going to tell me that I shouldn’t had been out at all? I obviously took the necessary precautions and consciously tried not to provoke anyone, so does that mean that I should just give in and accept such disrespectful behavior?

This summer I worked at a (daytime) bar and got so much abuse from horny middle-aged men just because I was a young female waitress. It was hard work because it was only one person working per shift, and the temperatures in my home country are considerably higher in the summer than here in the UK. Yet I wore full-length trousers/jeans to work everyday, even if I was burning, just so I wouldn’t have to listen to even more inappropriate comments. The problem is that in those guys’ perception it’s completely acceptable to make remarks and hit on ‘the waitress’ (it was almost as if I had been working in a 1800s tavern, not a modern café). For them it was all just a bit of banter but I felt so humiliated and degraded sometimes. I also get wolf-whistled at by old farmers if I ride a bike in shorts around my town. I got wolf-whistled at by groups of old men (usually construction workers and the like) as early as at the age of 15, and all I did was just walk down some random street. You have no idea how frightening that is for young girls. Now tell me, was it my fault that I felt uncomfortable by someone else’s remarks/behaviour just because I happen to have a vagina, or was it theirs because they were the ones who disrespected me?

When I was still in high school I intentionally wore unflattering clothes because I felt ashamed to wear clothes that could potentially call for male attention. I am almost 22 now and I only started wearing dresses, shorts and flattering tops this summer. Covering myself had nothing to do with my body image, I actually like my body. Yet I still had low self-esteem because of a number of incidents where guys humiliated me and treated me like a piece of meat when I was younger. And I'm average looking at best, I just developed early. I still sometimes feel uncomfortable and guilty like I’m the one provoking sleazy behavior if I happen to show some flesh by wearing tasteful, but tight fitting clothes. But I shouldn’t have to feel this way, no one should, regardless of gender. I can wear whatever I want and go wherever I want without having to be degraded by some drooling guys with no manners.

And it’s similar with guys in clubs, they don’t realize how inappropriate their behavior is. I understand that people lose inhibitions because of alcohol, and I realize that a lot of people do go clubbing to pull, but that doesn’t make it ok to invade someone’s personal space like that. And I realize that sometimes guys just try their luck with random girls or misread the signals, that is not the problem at all. Honestly, I am flattered if someone approaches me, but there’s a massive difference between starting a conversation with someone in a respectful manner and between gluing your crotch to their bum/forcefully kissing them without so much as a ‘hello, I’m x, what is your name’. Something like that can ruin the whole night for someone else and seriously impact their self esteem.

Oh really...? HI

You are actually not the first girl I’ve heard say this. Maybe I’ll have to check it out myself.

It was actually a good analogy, just because you don't accept how it is doesn't mean it was a bad analogy.

People go to McDonalds for quick and easy food. People go to clubs for quick and easy sex. Deal with it. You want filet mignon? Don't go to McDonalds. You want a guy who will treat you nice? Don't go to a club.

Oh right, how silly of me to think that some people actually go out to dance and enjoy the music, NOT to get humped. It wasn't a bad analogy because I don't agree with it, it was a bad analogy because it was based on a false assumption and applied with poor logic. The principles on which you base your conclusions are different for each of the two examples, therefore the analogy isn't valid.

You are not a guy. Guys go to clubs to get laid.

So? Why should I deprive myself of something I enjoy just because someone else doesn't know how to behave in public?? This is exactly the kind of inverted sexism py0alb was talking about.

You are not a guy. Guys go to clubs to get laid.