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My girlfriend is always talking to other boys?

I've always been a fan of not doing anything to my partner that I wouldn't want her to do. I speak to no girls through text, snapchat, Facebook, Twitter or anything. I haven't even got any girls on my snapchat because I'm just not interested and I hardly use it anyway.

However my girlfriend is always constantly talking to other boys. Now I understand she's going to have guy friends but I hate hate hate when she's constantly talking to boys on her snapchat because one I can't see messages and two it makes me feel so uncomfortable. I believe flirting is cheating and I don't think my girlfriend does. She says they just talk as friends but she knows how much it annoys me and how much I hate it.

Just don't know what to do, I'm really sick of it tbh. My ex girlfriend who wasn't perfect or anything never did this kind of stuff to me. Just think it's wrong and I'd never do it to her. Maybe I'm being pathetic, just dunno what to do? Shall I not let it bother me or?

Reply 1

username2362191

I really do hope this thread is a bad joke.

Reply 2

ImagineCats

If the only member of the 'threatening' opposite sex you talk to is your significant other, you're isolating yourself from other girls and not realizing that it's possible to have friends of all genders.

This happened to my sister too, so I'd suggest if it really does bug you then don't be afraid to talk to the gf about how you feel about this- stress how much you trust her yet you can't shake the anxiety.

Reply 3

StarsDestination

Hmm this seems suspicious, definitely red flag. Either talk to her about it or do what I do in a stressful situation:

Attachment not found

Edit: of course if I have misconstrued and you are being controlling then you are in the wrong. There is a delicate balance and I am not an expert sorry.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 4

thefatone

Original post by Anonymous

well not great gf material then? ask to see what she's sending and if she hides then you have good reason to suspect that she's cheating on you and flirting with other boys. if she'll show you without hesitation then it's fine right?

Reply 5

username2362191

No, but honestly?
You sound extremely controlling and like you don't really trust your girlfriend. It also sounds like you're feeling hurt over a simple nothing. Perhaps she's just one of those girls who have a lot of male friends, or get along with males better than she does females? If so, that's completely normal. I generally don't get along with girls, and so my closest friends - and the majority of my friends - are males. Never hear my man fussing about it.

But if it makes you so uncomfortable you should tell her. Or have her introduce you to her male friends. Perhaps they can become mutual friends.
I quite honestly think you're reading way too much into this. Your girlfriend sounds like any other normal girl I know, or have known the last years.

Reply 6

whorace

Either insecurity or there is just something off about her, I don't agree with the posts above about how it is completely normal as you seem to believe she is flirting with others, which you are clearly not ok with and consider cheating. It's fine to have friends, of any gender, but trust is important, and it's not just a case of you trusting her, it's a case of her being able to be trusted. Can she be trusted?

Reply 7

viciousechoes

If you don't trust her, then what is the point of being with her?

Reply 8

whorace

Original post by viciousechoes

If you don't trust her, then what is the point of being with her?

I always hear this but truthfully most relationships are based more on feeling than these hard barriers, trust often changes and sometimes you might lose trust on someone on the basis of feeling alone, without cold fact which later proves true, I am not saying that is the case, just that it is important to understand that insecurity and intuiton can be difficult to distinguish.

Reply 9

viciousechoes

Original post by whorace

I understand completely what you're saying, but what it seems to me (I'm only assuming!) is that he didn't trust her from the beginning (or at least when he found that she was talking to guys, albeit friendly).

It's honestly something he should talk to her about before making any rash decisions.

Reply 10

ikhan94

It is possible to have friends of the opposite sex mate sorry...

Reply 11

jawsontheflooor

if it's constant it's disrespectful, chat to ur girl op

Reply 12

username2362191

Original post by jawsontheflooor

if it's constant it's disrespectful, chat to ur girl op

It doesn't have to be. What if her best friend (apart from her boyfriend) is a male?

Reply 13

jawsontheflooor

Original post by vonbroten

It doesn't have to be. What if her best friend (apart from her boyfriend) is a male?

of course it's fine to have male best friends and to talk to them but not necessary for her to do it in the company of op

Reply 14

username2362191

Original post by jawsontheflooor

of course it's fine to have male best friends and to talk to them but not necessary for her to do it in the company of op

I don't see the problem in talking to male friends when you're with your boyfriend?
Unless they're having sex while she's doing it. Now that would be weird.

Reply 15

Spongebob'sPants

There should be some sort of middle ground or compromise, surely.

If you care for your partner, you take their feelings into consideration.

If you feel she is going way over board, talking/flirting with other guys, have a word with her.

Reply 16

LinxRalax

Keep your boundaries mate. Yes, not every girl Is same but we boys know how guys function. Girls love attention, they love feeling validated by guys who always orbit around them. Just talk to her about this, tell her that you are not comfortable with It. Snapchat Is cancer mate. If she agrees well and good, If not just dump her. We guys are always a liability. Just work on yourself, the right one will find you and love and respect your boundaries. Simple