always feel like a coward/wimp

When I was younger my Dad used to call me a coward wimp and I used to ignore him. Now I am younger I can see that I am always nervous and on edge. I have no aggression and can't imagine ever being good in a fight I also can't express anger very well so tend to bottle it up. It has kind of become pathetic the only time I feel ballsy or aggressive is after I do weight lifting. It causes a lot of problems as I have kind of become a recluse and kind of feel scared of the world.

Reply 1

Blondie987

This stereotype of guys 'needing' to be aggressive is so outdated and really not need in our society, if you want to be more assertive, get out more and build your confidence but aggression is definitely not a good thing.

Reply 2

lowkey-loki

you should probably ignore you dad he sounds like an idiot. aggression is definitely not cool. just go with the flow.

Reply 3

whorace

Courage and aggresion are not the same thing, and frankly you do sound like a wimp. Courage is not an absence of fear, it is doing something in spite of that, so whatever it is that scares you, do it anyway.

Reply 4

||TheUnknown||

Original post by whorace

Courage and aggresion are not the same thing... Courage is not an absence of fear, it is doing something in spite of that, so whatever it is that scares you, do it anyway.

Reply 5

user73867

Find something worth defending. Finding something that is more precious than your life or your pride even if you get beat to a pulp and defend it anyway.

Having things that you love will make you give you the violence you need to defend them in time of need.

Aggression for the sake of aggression makes you an insecure idiot. You'll bottle it when your aggression is needed because you only care about yourself and your self-preservation. Being willing to sacrifice yourself for something you love is manly.

SS

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 6

Anonymous #2

Original post by Supersaps

Can you explain the bit in bold please? Why would someone bottle it when their aggression is needed?

Reply 7

username2269391

Original post by Anonymous

Human chorionic gonadotropin

Reply 8

user73867

Original post by Anonymous

Can you explain the bit in bold please? Why would someone bottle it when their aggression is needed?

The instinct of self-preservation is pretty strong. To overcome it, you need an equally strong or stronger force.

If your aggression is only a way of making yourself feel better or as a way of masking your own insecurities then as soon're as you become genuinely at risk (I.e. when you're really needed), you're going to bottle it because it's not going to make you feel better. In fact, you'll probably feel a lot worse.

Think about the group of chavs that will happily beat someone up 10 vs 1 because there's no risk to them, but as soon as it comes to standing up alone, there's not a sod in sight.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 9

whorace

Original post by Anonymous

Can you explain the bit in bold please? Why would someone bottle it when their aggression is needed?

He's spot on tbh, I used to just not care when someone did something to me, what the hell does it matter? Why get aggressive over something like that? But if I see something happen to someone I care about I lose it, go ape ****.