Why doesn't my boyfriend go down on me ??

Anonymous #1

What the caption says

Reply 1

martinnmartin

18

We'll need more detail than that

Do you?

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Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by martinnmartin

We'll need more detail than that

Do you?

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Yes I do and he loves it

Are you clean?

Never mind that stuff, does he know that you'd like him to?

If he does, have you asked him why he doesn't want to reciprocate - forget that, why he doesn't want to give you pleasure that way? Is he nervous that he won't do it properly (you'll teach him) or thinks he won't like the taste (you can put a wet finger in his mouth) or...?

You have a number of options, including saying 'no more oral on you until you've gone down on me, properly' or finding a new boyfriend or living with it or...

Ultimately, some men really don't like giving oral. I find that utterly baffling, but...

Reply 5

PandaWho

17

Original post by unprinted

Never mind that stuff, does he know that you'd like him to?

If he does, have you asked him why he doesn't want to reciprocate - forget that, why he doesn't want to give you pleasure that way? Is he nervous that he won't do it properly (you'll teach him) or thinks he won't like the taste (you can put a wet finger in his mouth) or...?

You have a number of options, including saying

Spoiler

Ultimately, some men really don't like giving oral. I find that utterly baffling, but...

These are stupid options. Just because he potentially doesnt like going down on her she shoulsnt give him ultimatums!
Especially sexual activity, thats NOT how a positive relationship works.

OP simply ask him, find out, try a compramise, but ultimately if he doesnt like it he doesnt like it. Move on, carry on going down on him if its something you both enjoy.

Im not keen on going down on my partner but he doesnt overly mind and he certainly hasnt stopped going down on me because of it!

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Reply 6

unprinted

19

Amongst the options was 'living with it' - did you miss that?

For some people, this is a deal breaker. From the other side, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who didn't want me to go down on them, for example.

Reply 7

PandaWho

17

Original post by unprinted

Amongst the options was 'living with it' - did you miss that?

For some people, this is a deal breaker. From the other side, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who didn't want me to go down on them, for example.

Its not a healthy realationship if thats a dealbreaker. You should NEVER push someone to do something especially if its sexual. Relationships should never just be about sex, sex should be a nice addition, but you dont need sex to be with someone

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Reply 8

unprinted

19

I would say that you're both right and wrong.

I would never dream of pushing someone into being sexual in a way that they didn't want to be, and have plenty of friend relationships that aren't sexual. Sometimes, I'd love it if they were, but see the start of the paragraph... I'd much rather have them as friends.

But on the other, I have been in a sexual relationship where the sex stopped and it was the beginning of the end. Plus some sorts of sex are seen as deal breakers by plenty of people, especially around (not) having kids.

Here, if A wants B to go down on them but refuses to reciprocate, then it's up to B whether or not to continue the sexual relationship, not us. If they do there are, again, several options including getting it via a relationship with someone else as well. That could be done in a variety of ways too - there's something I enjoy a lot that my partner doesn't, and I get to do it (but not some other stuff) with others.

It's a matter of negotiation, one way or another, and not every deal can be made.