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Parents Pressuring me into Medicine

I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality') and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).

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You should give it some more thought, perhaps even try to consider it.
But most importantly, do what YOU want to do as Medicine is not a half-hearted career; the majority of people that do it are determined.
Your results are excellent btw
Ok well, this is your life and you really have a good set of grades so you should really be going into something suited to you, if you said you wanted to become a pro dj I could understand being angry but you really should do what you want.
Biochem is a good idea and if you want to do It I say go ahead
Drop out and become a stripper....
Reply 4
Avatar for xboc
xboc
12
Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
Nope, Its not what you want and i don't think it will be

How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
No idea, My parent have always been open about what i want to do and have always left it up to me to decide

Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
Not a chemistry or biology person so idk. But biochemistry or maybe just pure biology or pure chemistry would be fine.

What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
No clue but as long as you can prove yourself different among others and highlight your ability, i believe you would definitely be able to land a job you like and have decent pay

Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Its your life and its your choice. Be firm with your choice. Dont be like me.(Im still choosing between mechanical or electrical engineering or physics.)

Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).


Replies are in bold
Reply 5
Avatar for Andy Social
Andy Social
OP
3
Original post by Abolisher
Drop out and become a stripper....


My parents would love that :biggrin: Also, I basically live for studying in my library cave so..
Reply 6
Avatar for Andy Social
Andy Social
OP
3
Original post by TheGrammarGuru
You should give it some more thought, perhaps even try to consider it.
But most importantly, do what YOU want to do as Medicine is not a half-hearted career; the majority of people that do it are determined.
Your results are excellent btw

That's what I was thinking :frown: I feel like doctors should be totally committed to their job, and I don't have that commitment. But, on the other hand, everyone tells me doing research or a degree that isn't medicine would be a 'waste' of my grades.. :s-smilie:
Reply 7
Avatar for Milzime
Milzime
18
tell me when you decide because I'm in a similar (not situationally) but
similar..

..
Medicine means commitment. If there is not passion, you will struggle to study and finish your degree. After that, IF you will practice, most probably you will not be satisfied. "If there is no love, there is nothing!"

PS: are you year 13 now? Where did you apply last year?
What about Dentistry?
Also why not get a PhD in maybe pure Biology or Chemistry. That way you'd still be a doctor but not in the traditional sense. There's many ways to finance a PhD, and with your grades and extracurriculars you may be able to get a scholarship.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).

let's do this
1.dude i'm sitting here with like d's and e's in physics at AS *cries eyeballs out
2. if that's your personality you won't make a good doctor, i guarantee it, if you don't want to do the job then don't do it, that's like saying i'm going to walk 20 miles to this place and back, you feel like you have to do it and you're literally just hurting yourself, there are always other ways to do things.
3. ok disclaimer here(no real harm intended here) don't ****ing consider a job based soley on the money and job stability, they are large parts of it but don't account for bloody everything. like my last point why do something when you hate it and don't want to do it?(we fear consequences sometimes so we do the action anyway, homework may be such an example) thing is i've overheard a **** ton of conversations about medicine and being a doctor, don't ****ing do it if you're just going for money, do it because you ****ing enjoy it. Especially being a doctor since i hear a lot going round that it's not good to be a doctor anymore. Do a job because you love it not because you love what the job may give you.
4. LOLOLOLOL just because you're not gonna do what they want means they give you all this ****? dude you can do whatever you want in life, you got amazing grades and most likely you can almost get any job you want, provided it's within your reach.
5. did 20 seconds research and found this http://www.savethestudent.org/student-jobs/top-5-paid-careers-and-what-to-study-to-get-into-them.html yes it's from jan 2015 but the salary and stuff won't have changed that much
6. no
if they're hard headed then you'll never get them to listen to you. possibly if you can come up with another job prospect and show them it pays better then possibly you could persuade them?
not sure
not sure
not sure :/ :colonhash:

hope this helps
Reply 11
Avatar for Maker
Maker
20
Medicine needs a shed load of commitment. If you are unsure about it, try to get some work experience and see for yourself.

Plenty of people with your grades don't do medicine and its selfish of your parents to try to pressure you into doing something which you will fail at unless you are very self motivated at.

Your parents need to stop trying to live vicariously through their children. A lot of parents try to do this to make up for their own disappointments with their lives or try to maintain their image of success and they need therapy, not trying to force their kids into something they don't want.

I have kids in year 8 and I have told them they have to choose what they want to do because they have to live their own lives when me and their mother are gone.
If you're forced into it, its also likely that you will burn out extremely fast.
I would take a year out from the decision, to allow enough time to come to your own. There is no rush, even though it probably feels like it.
Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).


You should deffo but it's really your choice, do you like it / enjoy it ?
I'm not going to be a wishy-washy little crap-head who's gonna go saying "DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO!" and stuff like that.

Your parents are RIGHT.

Why? Let me give you a little story of what happened to one of my cousins who did what you're probably going to do:

He loved cars. He loved designing. He loved art. He went into some car-designing degree-thing, got out of Uni.

He was pretty damn happy, had a graduation party and EVERYTHING.

Then... he just stayed at home. WHY? He couldn't find a single person willing to hire him with that kinda wacko degree.

So, advise to you. Listen to your parents. You may hate them and rage about them for a good ten years, but after that ten years, you'll look at that nice hefty amount of cash sitting in your bank account, the awesome huge house, sexy car and beautiful wife and kids, and be like "damn, good thing I listened". Not like my idiotic cousin who's a stay-at-home-dude with no life ahead of him. He's probably going to have to work as a shopkeeper or some other **** job, when he could've had the world with his brains.

But even after all that, I have no say in your life, so do what you want. I can't convince you to do stuff. If you wanna go into BioChem, fine. Just think about the consequences of doing so.

-Writer_Refresh

Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).
Reply 15
Avatar for Maker
Maker
20
Original post by Writer_Refresh
I'm not going to be a wishy-washy little crap-head who's gonna go saying "DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO!" and stuff like that.

Your parents are RIGHT.

Why? Let me give you a little story of what happened to one of my cousins who did what you're probably going to do:

He loved cars. He loved designing. He loved art. He went into some car-designing degree-thing, got out of Uni.

He was pretty damn happy, had a graduation party and EVERYTHING.

Then... he just stayed at home. WHY? He couldn't find a single person willing to hire him with that kinda wacko degree.

So, advise to you. Listen to your parents. You may hate them and rage about them for a good ten years, but after that ten years, you'll look at that nice hefty amount of cash sitting in your bank account, the awesome huge house, sexy car and beautiful wife and kids, and be like "damn, good thing I listened". Not like my idiotic cousin who's a stay-at-home-dude with no life ahead of him. He's probably going to have to work as a shopkeeper or some other **** job, when he could've had the world with his brains.

But even after all that, I have no say in your life, so do what you want. I can't convince you to do stuff. If you wanna go into BioChem, fine. Just think about the consequences of doing so.

-Writer_Refresh


What makes you think the OP wants to do a degree designing cars? There are plenty of other things the OP can do besides medicine. I hear 95% of people who did not do medicine have jobs and some of it is well paid.
Should I do medicine?
No. Chances are you're right and you'll hate it. Medicine is a long hard slog and if you dislike it as much as you say, you'll either drop out or despise being a junior doctor (even more so with this new contract stuff) and quit medicine later.

How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
I think you'll just have to tell them it's your decision as its your future. That if they want to go to medical school then they should apply (<-- A bit snarky but that's just me). Tell them that the vast majority of people who get good grades aren't doctors and are getting on fine. You could also sprinkle stuff about the new JD contract.

Or you could apply, flunk UKCAT/BMAT, write a subpar personal statement, do crap in the interview and get rejected. Then tell your parents you weren't good enough. :biggrin::biggrin:

Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
Biochemistry, biology, chemistry, medicinal chemistry, biomedical engineering, biomedical science? Idk, I think it's best to ask this question on a more chem/bio related subforum.

What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
If you do a science degree you won't be forever unemployed, science degrees are very employable. You can go into research & academia, industry, further study, teaching... Depending on how quantitative your degree, is you could sell out and go into finance for the £££ (but I imagine it requires some prep with internships, tests and whatnot)

Any further life advice? ( I need it)
In terms of school you're doing really well, carry on with what you're doing and best of luck! If your parents really do love you, then they should support you on your future endeavours.

Once again, best of luck :
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Maker
What makes you think the OP wants to do a degree designing cars? There are plenty of other things the OP can do besides medicine. I hear 95% of people who did not do medicine have jobs and some of it is well paid.


Mate, I was just stating an example, so calm the **** down. I'm just saying medicine is one of the more better career choices, as it has a wide branch of jobs, and is much more stable compared to most jobs.
Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).


Do not do medicine if you don't enjoy it and go and do what you actually enjoy
Original post by Andy Social
I love science, have 12 A*s at GCSE, 4 As at AS level, am predicted 3 A*s at a level (biology, chemistry, maths) and am involved in many extra-curriculars (mentoring, sport, orchestras, grade 8 distinctions in instruments etc.). Basically, I'm a stereotypical med school applicant. The problem? I really, really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do medicine (I think). My social/people skills are pretty abysmal, I'm selfish and uncaring, I don't find the nobility/helping others/prestige of medicine appealing and I just generally feel I don't have any of the key qualities/personality traits needed to be a good doctor. Furthermore, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy the job - the degree may be fine for me, but the career after it wouldn't be. My parents and many of my siblings have done medicine (so I guess I have some first-hand experience of its 'reality':wink: and I feel this is the only reason I've ever considered it. That and the money and job stability. Sorry for rambling on so much...
Basically, I told my parents I wasn't doing medicine. Perhaps predictably, they exploded. The past few days have been filled with screaming, financial and emotional blackmail, screaming, threats, screaming, and them saying (screaming) that I'll never get a job/house/decent wage/car/fridge/microwave/private jet etc.
I've been looking into science degrees (I really enjoy chemistry and biology so I was thinking biochemistry - any advice/experience/recommendations would be amazing) but I am worried about job opportunities/stability/wages (perhaps just a product of my parents' brain-washing over the years that medicine is the only route). Research seems like something I'd enjoy, but I don't come from a wealthy background (and my parents won't be supporting me at all, apparently) so I don't know how I'd afford to do a PhD. (Really sorry for rambling again).
Essentially, what I'm asking is:
Should I do medicine?
How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
Any further life advice? ( I need it)
Thank you very much in advance for your responses (and I'm very sorry for the whiny, rambling, fwp post).


Do whatever makes you happy - not what would please your family.
Should I do medicine?
No, not if that's not where your passion lies.How do I get my parents to accept me not doing medicine?
Apply to the courses you want - what can they do then? :biggrin:
Any recommendations for science (chemistry/biology) degrees?
biochemistry, biomedicine, pharmacy, pure bio/chem, chemical engineering etc. (maybe even dentistry??)
What are the jobs/job opportunities/stability/wages like?
They vary for all of the above so idk

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