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What should I say to her?

We're both in college and haven't spoken for a while now, about 9 months and yes, she is single. I've never told anyone I like them before, that's probably why it's making me nervous. I'm normally very shy and reserved when it comes to romantic feelings.

I will ask her out for a coffee or something but what exactly do I tell her? I don't see her enough to get back talking to her as friends again, I have to just take the shot. Do I tell her how I feel or play it cool and ask her out? I really don't know. I suppose two years will lead to 1 minute of courage.
Original post by Anonymous
We're both in college and haven't spoken for a while now, about 9 months and yes, she is single. I've never told anyone I like them before, that's probably why it's making me nervous. I'm normally very shy and reserved when it comes to romantic feelings.

I will ask her out for a coffee or something but what exactly do I tell her? I don't see her enough to get back talking to her as friends again, I have to just take the shot. Do I tell her how I feel or play it cool and ask her out? I really don't know. I suppose two years will lead to 1 minute of courage.


If you straight up ask her out most likely she might reject because you need to get to know and bond with her more, once time has passed then you will know when to ask her out
Original post by Anonymous
We're both in college and haven't spoken for a while now, about 9 months and yes, she is single. I've never told anyone I like them before, that's probably why it's making me nervous. I'm normally very shy and reserved when it comes to romantic feelings.

I will ask her out for a coffee or something but what exactly do I tell her? I don't see her enough to get back talking to her as friends again, I have to just take the shot. Do I tell her how I feel or play it cool and ask her out? I really don't know. I suppose two years will lead to 1 minute of courage.

give her a letter or a card and write whatever you wanna say it to her... :dontknow:
Reply 3
Girls love written down things, stuff they can go back to and keep and read, so definitely try writing down your feelings - just ensure it doesn't take a creepy, desperate twist, especially if you two aren't the closest. My boyfriend and I only met February last year, and by June were dating... However by around March / April we were doing everything a couple does... we were basically just not labelling it as a relationship. I wasn't even looking out for a boyfriend, it just kind of happened.
Tbh I think this happened without either of us actually stating it or suggesting it, our friendship turned romantic naturally and by June when he ~*finally*~ asked me out, it didn't feel any different, which was nice. We were both comfortable and felt happy with the way things were and so it wasn't too much of a big step.
I think the thing is to take it slowly - if things start going a bit more flirty, thats good, however if she keeps explicitly rejecting your 'romantic' attempts, or whatever they may be... leave it. There's another girl somewhere, who will be thinking the exact same about you, you just dont know it yet. The best things com unexpectedly.:^_^:
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
We're both in college and haven't spoken for a while now, about 9 months and yes, she is single. I've never told anyone I like them before, that's probably why it's making me nervous. I'm normally very shy and reserved when it comes to romantic feelings.

I will ask her out for a coffee or something but what exactly do I tell her? I don't see her enough to get back talking to her as friends again, I have to just take the shot. Do I tell her how I feel or play it cool and ask her out? I really don't know. I suppose two years will lead to 1 minute of courage.


Don't go telling her your feelings she might get creeped out if she don't know you that well. If you see her ask how she is how her work is and ask her if she would like to go for a coffee or lunch.
What about adding her on fb to get to know her if you don't see her much before asking her out.
Reply 5
Original post by fatima1998
give her a letter or a card and write whatever you wanna say it to her... :dontknow:


When i was in year 8 my friend had a massive crush on this boy who was very popular. Wrote the letter gave it to a girl to give to him in class as our class was next door to each other and the boy wrote 'i dont like you, you are ugly! and gave it to the girl to give to my friend..
Would work if op knows her abit but as its been 9 months he need to work on this.
Original post by chikane
When i was in year 8 my friend had a massive crush on this boy who was very popular. Wrote the letter gave it to a girl to give to him in class as our class was next door to each other and the boy wrote 'i dont like you, you are ugly! and gave it to the girl to give to my friend..
Would work if op knows her abit but as its been 9 months he need to work on this.


but he isn't popular...
plus he should take her out for dinner or lunch and give her a letter there so he can see her reaction...
Reply 7
Original post by fatima1998
but he isn't popular...
plus he should take her out for dinner or lunch and give her a letter there so he can see her reaction...


What i was trying to say is that my friend hardly knew the guy she liked how he looked and he got freaked out probably being 12/13 years old didn't help either.

It depends how well they know each other if i was a girl and this guy would say hi and make small talk and then we wouldnt see each other for 9 months and he asked me out for lunch, i would assume he is being friendly and go along with him if he showed a letter declaring his feelings for me i would feel very very awkward because i don't know him or i might not feel anything for him and it would put me on the spot.
Op needs to try to show his interest by being flirty and creating a vibe between him and her and leave the letter for later.
I would find it romantic having something written for me but only if i knew the person and there was a mutual vibe between us.
Reply 8
Thanks for the advice. I think likely next time I see her I'll just start a friendly chat, see where things go, it doesn't have to be a long conversation just a quick 1 minute chat as we walk past each other. If I think there's something I'll just ask her out for a coffee or a lunch or something. I might write some things down but not yet as I don't wanna scare her off, perhaps when things are going well or if it's her birthday or an occasion or something. Any additional thoughts are welcome, cheers for the help again
Reply 9
I don't see her enough to start conversations all the time and build up some rapport. Literally next time I see her I just have to have the chat and then go in for the kill.
Any other responses are welcomed.
Original post by Anonymous
We're both in college and haven't spoken for a while now, about 9 months and yes, she is single. I've never told anyone I like them before, that's probably why it's making me nervous. I'm normally very shy and reserved when it comes to romantic feelings.

I will ask her out for a coffee or something but what exactly do I tell her? I don't see her enough to get back talking to her as friends again, I have to just take the shot. Do I tell her how I feel or play it cool and ask her out? I really don't know. I suppose two years will lead to 1 minute of courage.


Never tell her how you feel! Just ask her out and show how you feel by actions! :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
Any other responses are welcomed.


Original post by Shiv Loves Maths
Never tell her how you feel! Just ask her out and show how you feel by actions! :smile:


This definitely a work colleague and i had a sweet friendship where we would buy each other gifts and help each other out alot however i can tell there was always a strong chemistry between us and we would text each other if we were on holiday wishing the other a good week and she would leave little origami models on my pc, she bought a new house i bought her a massive hamper and you could tell by this we cared alot for each other and there was no need to declare our feelings with words our actions showed it.

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