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Does being best friends before make it less awkward for a relationship?

I am best friends with a girl for about 4 years, we became friends in university halls, I was hosting a halls party and met her that way. The following year we were put in the same halls and became the best of friends, it was never anything sexual, just hanging out a lot, watching TV, films, playing video games and a lot drinking.

My room was at the end of the halls so she would often come in to chat and would be too lazy to move she would share my bed with me. It's all in totally innocent fun, she is quite a attractive girl so I always had to prevent myself from getting aroused.

We made a rule if the door is unlocked come in and if it's locked go away, normally if we had company. She would help me get rid of girls that would refuse to leave when a girl came over to have sex with.

After we both finished university we continued hanging out by still just as mates and would often ask what I'm up to despite now both living in our hometowns. I've been dating a few girls but they all seem to be boring and very vain, lacking in personality so I often think of my friend.

Now I realise what a great girl she is, I'm thinking of asking her out as more than friends but we haven't had sex. It's hard because Im gambling a good friendship and don't want to ruin it and don't want be awkward if I ask.

Has anyone experienced this how did over come it? Have had sex or started a relationship with a friend you known for a while? Just want advice and the right move to make.
Being good friends let alone best friends and going into a relationship helps a tremendous amount. As you two already know most stuff about each other, you can skip the whole getting-to-know each other stage and just move on into the relationship.

In terms of actually making the move, dont hesitate and just go for it. Trust me.

I was in the EXACT same position as you, was very close friends with this girl and we'd talk about everything together. We'd hung out, both really enjoyed it and at that point I knew I liked her more than a friend. She mentioned how this guy she was dating was a complete dick and how she wanted to find a nice guy, I took that opportunity and just spilled the beans on how I felt. Since then we've been in a perfect relationship, most likely because we were already close before the relationship and were already comfortable with each other.

Maybe take her out somewhere nice, maybe dinner or the movies but make sure to try and play it more as a date rather than a casual outing with her. You want her to get a slight idea that you could be interested in more than a friendship. Play it cool in other words, gauge her reaction then move from there.
Original post by Anonymous
I am best friends with a girl for about 4 years, we became friends in university halls, I was hosting a halls party and met her that way. The following year we were put in the same halls and became the best of friends, it was never anything sexual, just hanging out a lot, watching TV, films, playing video games and a lot drinking.

My room was at the end of the halls so she would often come in to chat and would be too lazy to move she would share my bed with me. It's all in totally innocent fun, she is quite a attractive girl so I always had to prevent myself from getting aroused.

We made a rule if the door is unlocked come in and if it's locked go away, normally if we had company. She would help me get rid of girls that would refuse to leave when a girl came over to have sex with.

After we both finished university we continued hanging out by still just as mates and would often ask what I'm up to despite now both living in our hometowns. I've been dating a few girls but they all seem to be boring and very vain, lacking in personality so I often think of my friend.

Now I realise what a great girl she is, I'm thinking of asking her out as more than friends but we haven't had sex. It's hard because Im gambling a good friendship and don't want to ruin it and don't want be awkward if I ask.

Has anyone experienced this how did over come it? Have had sex or started a relationship with a friend you known for a while? Just want advice and the right move to make.


Why do you feel that you have to have sex before you start a relationship?...
Original post by yl95
Why do you feel that you have to have sex before you start a relationship?...


Yeah I was thinking the same thing O.o
Reply 4
Original post by yl95
Why do you feel that you have to have sex before you start a relationship?...


Because I don't want a relationship if the sex doesn't work.
Original post by Anonymous
Because I don't want a relationship if the sex doesn't work.


Most relationships do not start that way...most people want to trust/have a bond before they have sex.
Reply 6
Original post by yl95
Most relationships do not start that way...most people want to trust/have a bond before they have sex.


Yes but I've known my friend for quite a while and never had sex, the trust and bonding is already done through friendship. It's the next stage that I'm concerned about. To suddenly go out with her without doing anything sexual would be weird to me, it would just seem like we're still just friends.
friendzoned pal keep your distance a bit
Original post by Anonymous
Yes but I've known my friend for quite a while and never had sex, the trust and bonding is already done through friendship. It's the next stage that I'm concerned about. To suddenly go out with her without doing anything sexual would be weird to me, it would just seem like we're still just friends.


I'm saying this as a girl and obviously I can't speak for every other girl but I wouldn't have sex with my best friend even if I knew them really well until I got into a relationship. Do not rush it.

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