People in long-term relationships: Don't you get bored of the same person?

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Been wondering about this lately.

I think I've become too thirsty to be fully satisfied in a relationship and not get bored.

Reply 21

claireestelle

Original post by xobeauty

It's kind of different though, don't you think?
How's the relationship still exciting? the butterflies aren't as strong anymore?

What do you mean by exciting?

Reply 22

username155270

Original post by claireestelle

What do you mean by exciting?

You know the thrills you get in the first stages,blushing, butterflies, getting to know each other, the newly fresh flirting, the guessing games.

What's exciting after two years +
At that point it's just for sex,no?

Reply 23

claireestelle

Original post by xobeauty

I'd argue i still get the butterflies and yes we know each other incredibly well but there's still some little things we learn about each other from time to time. And no its not just about sex, it's about sharing your life with someone, having a family together etc.

Reply 24

username155270

Original post by claireestelle

How long have you been with yours?

Reply 25

hezzlington

Original post by xobeauty

It's kind of different though, don't you think?
How's the relationship still exciting? the butterflies aren't as strong anymore?

I imagine as time goes on, what becomes important in the relationship changes. I guess the things that occur so naturally in the embryonic stages of a relationship like 'butterflies' or exciting, passionate sex etc take work and effort further down the line.

Reply 26

claireestelle

Original post by xobeauty

How long have you been with yours?

Not far off 2 and a half years

Reply 27

Rhythmical

Original post by xobeauty

That's lust though. Love is much more deeper and becomes an emotional connection. You learn to love and live with them and accept their flaws. They're your best friend, partner and everything you could imagine. Lust is just the butterflies that people feel and unless you are serious about each other then it turns into love. A lot of teenage romances and relationships are just based on lust and infatuation.

Reply 28

username1726117

When I was in a long-term relationship, I never got bored. Sure, occasionally I would question the lack of excitement or fun in our relationship, but I always put it down to us becoming a bit more serious. Of course, it didn't stop me from thinking what else might be out there, but I dealt with those thoughts quite easily with the knowledge that I was in love with my partner and that the support and love she offered me were far more valuable than any short-term excitement I would get from a fresh relationship. She was my best friend.

Besides, boredom is a natural part of life. I love gaming, but I get so tremendously bored of it. I love computers, but I get bored of it. We all get bored of something/someone, but it's how we react to it that matters.

Reply 29

username155270

Original post by hezzlington

Yeah like real world adult things. That's what blows, I like the first stages

Reply 30

Rhapsodies

So you had second thoughts and yet you were trying to convince yourself that you were in love with your partner? I don't think you're meant to /persuade/ yourself to be in love.
Sorry, I am a sceptic when it comes to these things.

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Reply 31

welcometoib

Original post by xobeauty

yeah but then people join the real world, where the fancy and nonsense fairytales of having to feel butterflies every day cease to exist, and you just retain a strong and salient loving bond with your partner.

Reply 32

username1726117

Original post by Rhapsodies

I don't think any relationship is perfect to the point where you don't have the occasional fleeting thought or concern. I genuinely did love my partner. We had our ups and downs, but I was happy and content and I didn't want anything else. I suppose in my case my justification for thinking about what else was out there was that she was my first, and only. It's natural.

There was no convincing of myself that I loved her. If I didn't, I doubt I'd still be feeling the effects of our breakup one year later.

Reply 33

username155270

Original post by Rhythmical

That kinda love that you're discribing though is the same love we have for family.
I think it's important to feel more than that or else friends and family are enough.

(?)

Reply 34

keturah

Nope, when I've been in long term relationships I have never got bored of them. I think if I did then I'd probably be with the wrong person. But I am an all or nothing kind of person.

Reply 35

Rhythmical

Original post by xobeauty

That kinda love that you're discribing though is the same love we have for family.
I think it's important to feel more than that or else friends and family are enough.

(?)

Attraction comes into it and sometimes it is lust but most people in long term relationships who live together, spend so much time together, tend to just get along with the person and never want to let go of them. Sometimes, some people do feel as if it is boring and they have fallen out of love but it quickly comes back and it makes the love stronger. For most people it is the intimacy and the sex they have despite being together for a long time that they favour. As you get older, you will have children (maybe) and that makes you love your partner even more because you've made a child and that is an amazing gift. But love is subjective, and many people view it differently and feel different things.

Reply 36

0xygen

If you love your partner then you shouldn't.

Reply 37

donutellme

Don't you get tired of your parents or being yourself?

Reply 38

username155270

Original post by Rhythmical

Pretty much.

That's why all I'm considering at the end of the day is...
is he a good provider, will he be a good father, does he have the basic skills to teach our kids things such as skating, teaching them how to ride bikes, how to play every sport, and family values. And I'll be miserable it's ok.