Sexuality...

Don't feel pressure. If you're not ready to have a relationship or to have sex, then don't. Just because other people are doing it, doesn't mean you have to. Life is a long journey and there's nothing wrong with taking some time to find yourself. Sometimes things happen in a very organic and unplanned way, and just when you least expect. Enjoy life and don't worry if you feel you're not "normal" or different, just soak in experiences, make new friends, broaden your horizons, it all makes you a more rounded person and gives you more experience to make decisions about what you really want from life. Just relax.

Do you know that having sexual pleasure yourself can be rather enjoyable? (In other words, do you masturbate?) If so, what is inconceivable for you about enjoying it with someone else around?

I'm aware that this sounds patronising, but it's hard to be accurate about the rest of your life when you're 18... but if you're right, what would be the problem with not being sexual with anyone else? What do you think you would be missing?

(Given the number of posts here, there really isn't a need to bump them!)

I am a huge fan of masturbation for lots of reasons, but being sexual with someone else is - or can be - delightful in a similar (in terms of some of the physical sensations) but different (emotionally) way. Sharing sexual pleasure with someone, giving and receiving, can be a very bonding thing. There's also the way it can be used to make trust erotic.

There's an interesting book called 'Why Women Have Sex' by Cindy Meston & David Buss which goes beyond the usual three: relational, recreational and reproductive. No-one will share all of the reasons, and some people won't have any that appeal, but they're all reasons that make sense to 'some' to 'many' people.

Presumably you've thought about using 'asexual' as a label?

I've been struggling a lot with this in recent months... not because I don't know whether I'm bi/straight etc. but because of other issues...

...like the fact that I'm repulsed by the very idea of myself having sex with someone. I don't think I'd ever want to if I'm honest.

I do get aroused etc, but I only get attracted to fictional characters and not real people. Don't know if this makes me asexual or not?

I'm not completely opposed to a purely romantic relationship with no sex (though I know that would never happen), even though I used to be opposed to the very idea of love. It's just really confusing - I know what I'd want but if anyone asks I have no idea how I'd describe it...

Help please