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Landlord's kids are RUDE - what to do?!

This is long but advice MUCH appreciated thank you :smile:

I've been living as a lodger for the past couple of months. I knew the landlord prior to moving in as I rented from him before.

It's a good place but two of his kids (who are about 10 I think) are very rude to me and I can continually loudly overhear them saying stuff about me. I don't think speaking to them directly about it would do much good but idk if I should speak to my landlord or his wife. I am a decent tenant, always pay my rent on time, and their children sometimes do stuff like play the piano or blow the trumpet really early in the morning before school which a lot of lodgers would not be OK with. I have also done stuff like stay in when one of the kids wants to stay home and their mum wants to go out with the other kids.

When I first moved in I would say hi to the kids out of politeness and they wouldn't reply back, which isnt a big deal and I figured maybe it was the cultural difference. I stopped doing that and I mostly do my own thing (I only even use the kitchen, bathroom and my room so its not like I'm infringing on their space). I bought the family an Easter egg to be nice and gave it to their mum right in front of the kids, not one of the kids said thank you, again not too big a deal.

But if I'm in the bathroom, for example, and one of them wants to use it, they often just bang on the door loudly, and if I say something like "Hang on a second!" they don't listen but just keep on banging. If they don't get their way they go downstairs and I can hear them complaining to their mum and mentioning my name, but Idk what she tells them as it's in a foreign language. I often hear them banging on the door when each other is using the bathroom but surely at that age they should know not to do that to strangers?? I don't take a really long time in there. I was about to go into the bathroom once when one of them was walking towards it to, so to be polite I stopped and gestured towards it and asked if she wanted to use it. She didn't even reply just stared at me :lolwut:

I was also in the bathroom washing my face a few nights ago (not that late, about 10pm) and one of the kids started banging on the wall from their bedroom really loudly. I was so fed up I just ignored it and they stopped after a bit. But, last night, I heard them both going upstairs and they were like, "YAY! (my name) isn't in the bathroom" very loudly. They also have a friend round today (I think) and I just overheard them talking about going into my room and asking "is (my name) out?" I think I heard them say some other stuff about me too but I was too angry to try to overhear.

I get on OK with the landlord and his wife but I'm not sure if I should mention it to them or not or even just find a new place without doing so, I cant be in all the time if the kids are going to do stupid stuff like go into my room. I am definitely not one of those person who thinks children should be seen and not heard but they seem to be spoiled. Also, they are polite to my face but because the family aren't English sometimes I get the impression everyone is talking about me when I'm in the kitchen or something from the "looks" I'm getting while hearing them talk in their own language.

What do TSR? :smile:

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Reply 1
You could talk to the landlord and his wife about the children as they are taking away your privacy and annoying you constantly. See if it stops, if not, start looking for another place I guess?
Reply 2
Original post by BhavyaB
You could talk to the landlord and his wife about the children as they are taking away your privacy and annoying you constantly. See if it stops, if not, start looking for another place I guess?


Yeah, I'm not sure how to bring it up tho, suggestions? :colondollar:

I'm out a lot too, so I dont want the kids going into my room as revenge or something if their parents tell them off. I don't know if their parents will though TBH, they seem more like their kids' best friends which is nice but unfortunately they seem spoiled.

I am defo looking at new places though :yep:
Reply 3
Original post by TSRiann
Yeah, I'm not sure how to bring it up tho, suggestions? :colondollar:

I'm out a lot too, so I dont want the kids going into my room as revenge or something if their parents tell them off. I don't know if their parents will though TBH, they seem more like their kids' best friends which is nice but unfortunately they seem spoiled.

I am defo looking at new places though :yep:


Hmm, it's good that you're looking at new places and I do hope you find one soon. I don't really know how you should bring it up, maybe just straight forward tell them. My parents are my best friends(I'm an only child-not that spoiled!) but my parents would tell me off if I did something wrong. However, from what you've told me, I can't be sure their parents are like that. I don't really know what to do if the children do plan a revenge whilst you're out though. :frown:

I'm really sorry I'm not much help but I do hope whatever I've said is the slightest bit helpful :smile:
Stuff like this makes my blood boil lol. I think you should talk to the parents first, and if the kids still continue you should start to tell them off so they know you aren't someone that they can mess with. Its best if you go to the parents first, as if the kids then go crying to parents they'll know that the kids are at fault and not you.
Reply 5
Original post by BhavyaB
Hmm, it's good that you're looking at new places and I do hope you find one soon. I don't really know how you should bring it up, maybe just straight forward tell them. My parents are my best friends(I'm an only child-not that spoiled!) but my parents would tell me off if I did something wrong. However, from what you've told me, I can't be sure their parents are like that. I don't really know what to do if the children do plan a revenge whilst you're out though. :frown:

I'm really sorry I'm not much help but I do hope whatever I've said is the slightest bit helpful :smile:


Thank you, it was helpful :smile: Yeah I'll speak to them tomorrow I think and lock all my stuff away just to be on the safe side :grumble:

RegrettingAS
Stuff like this makes my blood boil lol. I think you should talk to the parents first, and if the kids still continue you should start to tell them off so they know you aren't someone that they can mess with. Its best if you go to the parents first, as if the kids then go crying to parents they'll know that the kids are at fault and not you.


Yeah I'm pretty chill about stuff usually but furious TBH. I wasn't sure if it was the culture difference but at that age they should still know basic manners? I'm talking to their parents tomorrow. Any suggestions on how to bring it up? :lol:
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 6
Original post by TSRiann
Thank you, it was helpful :smile: Yeah I'll speak to them tomorrow I think and lock all my stuff away just to be on the safe side :grumble:


That's a good idea. Good luck :hugs:
Eh sounds so annoying I feel sorry for you. They are kids, and if they are spoiled, what can you do. It's not your fault that they are that way. If the parents don't do anything to change their behaviour towards you and their shitty attitudes in general, then yeah, maybe it's best to move out and live somewhere else> Of course there's no guarantee you won't get even worse flatmates in the new place. Anyway, good luck to you. :smile:
Reply 8
Original post by newttella
Eh sounds so annoying I feel sorry for you. They are kids, and if they are spoiled, what can you do. It's not your fault that they are that way. If the parents don't do anything to change their behaviour towards you and their shitty attitudes in general, then yeah, maybe it's best to move out and live somewhere else> Of course there's no guarantee you won't get even worse flatmates in the new place. Anyway, good luck to you. :smile:


Thank you :smile: Any suggestions besides moving out?
Original post by TSRiann
Thank you :smile: Any suggestions besides moving out?


Really, I would talk to the parents. They obviously trust you and rely on you if they are asking you to for example watch their children. Perhaps they don't even realise that their children are "that bad". Talk to the parents, but try to do it in a respectful way e.g. don't let your annoyance towards the children control your tone of voice haha. Hopefully the parents respect you and try to make the situation better, as you are a tenant and have rights.
Reply 10
Original post by newttella
Really, I would talk to the parents. They obviously trust you and rely on you if they are asking you to for example watch their children. Perhaps they don't even realise that their children are "that bad". Talk to the parents, but try to do it in a respectful way e.g. don't let your annoyance towards the children control your tone of voice haha. Hopefully the parents respect you and try to make the situation better, as you are a tenant and have rights.


Thanks, I'm going to do that tomorrow. I do have rights yes :yep:

I will post an update x
****s will be ****s :frown:

I'd suggest talking to the parents about their behaviour - every (good) parent should be happy to help try and improve their children's behaviours :cute:
I been through this before, it's that entitlement and I guarantee the folks know about this already @Alexion

Original post by TSRiann


I get on OK with the landlord and his wife but I'm not sure if I should mention it to them or not or even just find a new place without doing so, I cant be in all the time if the kids are going to do stupid stuff like go into my room. I am definitely not one of those person who thinks children should be seen and not heard but they seem to be spoiled. Also, they are polite to my face but because the family aren't English sometimes I get the impression everyone is talking about me when I'm in the kitchen or something from the "looks" I'm getting while hearing them talk in their own language.

What do TSR? :smile:


They're gonna choose their kids over you, I'm afraid
Put up for now and save save save so you get yourself another place soon as
Reply 13
Original post by Alexion
****s will be ****s :frown:

I'd suggest talking to the parents about their behaviour - every (good) parent should be happy to help try and improve their children's behaviours :cute:


Ikr :frown:

Well I'm doing it tomorrow, ideas on what to say? :lol:

0to100
They're gonna choose their kids over you, I'm afraid
Put up for now and save save save so you get yourself another place soon as


Thanks. I am saving as I have a rolling contract but I don't want to just leave it for a few more months till then :s-smilie:

What happened in your situation? Would you not recommend talking to them?
Original post by TSRiann
Ikr :frown:

Well I'm doing it tomorrow, ideas on what to say? :lol:



Thanks. I am saving as I have a rolling contract but I don't want to just leave it for a few more months till then :s-smilie:

What happened in your situation? Would you not recommend talking to them?

For one time, the landlord had teenage kids, boy and girl and the boy always brought his mates over and they did like play wrestling upstairs and in the back garden a lot, we shared with their family and lived downstairs

I did speak to them and it didn't stop and the landlord showed where the kids got it from one day when she banged on the door herself and would have sex loudly and all, so I left with that month's rent and skipped towns before she stuck arrears on me, then sent it to her when I had it

Now I'm in a place where the landlords are very elderly and so their big bouncer son lives and supers downstairs and he smokes cannabis and talks to the point where the building shakes he's a powerful dude physically, has rape charges, prison record and all, but he always fixed our electric and steped in when we had rows and stuff. He died and so several horrible families have moved in overtime and been evicted in record time and the neighbours I've now smoke smoke smoke so badly domestic violence all that and I am contemplating ratting them out but Idk

I need some place to live so I'm putting up with it and the bad conditions and ****. I'm the type to put up in matters of desperation if it's not that bad, just a comofrtability issue but if you're not comfortable and not desperate either then do what feels right for you
Reply 15
Original post by 0to100
For one time, the landlord had teenage kids, boy and girl and the boy always brought his mates over and they did like play wrestling upstairs and in the back garden a lot, we shared with their family and lived downstairs

I did speak to them and it didn't stop and the landlord showed where the kids got it from one day when she banged on the door herself and would have sex loudly and all, so I left with that month's rent and skipped towns before she stuck arrears on me, then sent it to her when I had it

Now I'm in a place where the landlords are very elderly and so their big bouncer son lives and supers downstairs and he smokes cannabis and talks to the point where the building shakes he's a powerful dude physically, has rape charges, prison record and all, but he always fixed our electric and steped in when we had rows and stuff. He died and so several horrible families have moved in overtime and been evicted in record time and the neighbours I've now smoke smoke smoke so badly domestic violence all that and I am contemplating ratting them out but Idk

I need some place to live so I'm putting up with it and the bad conditions and ****. I'm the type to put up in matters of desperation if it's not that bad, just a comofrtability issue but if you're not comfortable and not desperate either then do what feels right for you


That sounds bad :s-smilie: Yeah the landlord and his wife are polite to my face but sometimes they'll talk to me and then turn and talk to their kids in a totally different tone of voice in their language and I can see "looks" going on? I'm not sure if they are saying stuff behind my back.

Have you looked for a new place? Hope that improves. Yeah it would be more convenient to stay here but it is really bothering me. Especially thinking they could be going into my room when I am out. I can't lock away all my things and TBH that is really bad behaviour.

I do have spare cash but one of the things I liked about here is the rolling contract. I might try talking to them first.
(edited 7 years ago)
I'd talk to the LL and or the wife. You are their paying guest and the kids shouldnt cheek you. If you are unhappy then just move. living with LL is bad news imo because the power dynamic is different. If they need the cash they will have a word.
Reply 17
Original post by 999tigger
I'd talk to the LL and or the wife. You are their paying guest and the kids shouldnt cheek you. If you are unhappy then just move. living with LL is bad news imo because the power dynamic is different. If they need the cash they will have a word.


Yeah I'm talking to them tomorrow. Idk if they need the cash or not but even if they do I'd rather they be honest with me than talk **** behind my back. I honestly don't know where the hostility is coming from though I've been a decent tenant.

Why do you reckon the power dynamic is different? :redface:
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by TSRiann
Yeah I'm talking to them tomorrow.

Why do you reckon the power dynamic is different? :redface:


Because you are living with the owner who has the power to terminate your tenancy when they want.
Original post by TSRiann
This is long but advice MUCH appreciated thank you :smile:

I've been living as a lodger for the past couple of months. I knew the landlord prior to moving in as I rented from him before.

It's a good place but two of his kids (who are about 10 I think) are very rude to me and I can continually loudly overhear them saying stuff about me. I don't think speaking to them directly about it would do much good but idk if I should speak to my landlord or his wife. I am a decent tenant, always pay my rent on time, and their children sometimes do stuff like play the piano or blow the trumpet really early in the morning before school which a lot of lodgers would not be OK with. I have also done stuff like stay in when one of the kids wants to stay home and their mum wants to go out with the other kids.

When I first moved in I would say hi to the kids out of politeness and they wouldn't reply back, which isnt a big deal and I figured maybe it was the cultural difference. I stopped doing that and I mostly do my own thing (I only even use the kitchen, bathroom and my room so its not like I'm infringing on their space). I bought the family an Easter egg to be nice and gave it to their mum right in front of the kids, not one of the kids said thank you, again not too big a deal.

But if I'm in the bathroom, for example, and one of them wants to use it, they often just bang on the door loudly, and if I say something like "Hang on a second!" they don't listen but just keep on banging. If they don't get their way they go downstairs and I can hear them complaining to their mum and mentioning my name, but Idk what she tells them as it's in a foreign language. I often hear them banging on the door when each other is using the bathroom but surely at that age they should know not to do that to strangers?? I don't take a really long time in there. I was about to go into the bathroom once when one of them was walking towards it to, so to be polite I stopped and gestured towards it and asked if she wanted to use it. She didn't even reply just stared at me :lolwut:

I was also in the bathroom washing my face a few nights ago (not that late, about 10pm) and one of the kids started banging on the wall from their bedroom really loudly. I was so fed up I just ignored it and they stopped after a bit. But, last night, I heard them both going upstairs and they were like, "YAY! (my name) isn't in the bathroom" very loudly. They also have a friend round today (I think) and I just overheard them talking about going into my room and asking "is (my name) out?" I think I heard them say some other stuff about me too but I was too angry to try to overhear.

I get on OK with the landlord and his wife but I'm not sure if I should mention it to them or not or even just find a new place without doing so, I cant be in all the time if the kids are going to do stupid stuff like go into my room. I am definitely not one of those person who thinks children should be seen and not heard but they seem to be spoiled. Also, they are polite to my face but because the family aren't English sometimes I get the impression everyone is talking about me when I'm in the kitchen or something from the "looks" I'm getting while hearing them talk in their own language.

What do TSR? :smile:

What revolting children! You should not have to put up with that. Speak to their parents and if that doesn't work, I would seriously consider moving out.

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