The Student Room Group

This Muslim Girl

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Original post by Londons slickest
That's okay, sorry for sounding rude. But it's pretty obvious the person you're quoting will not be swayed by you preaching the deen.

No offence but saying things like "Allah is almighty or all-seeing", is rather tedious, and something that I've heard over and over again.

So your quotes are nothing new.


I didn't know about that as iv'e just recently joined TSR and okay, dw I wont be posting comments on this thread I.A.
Hey Maradiah :ciao:

Ditch her, it's clear you have nothing in common with her and that she'd just make you miserable.
(edited 7 years ago)
Hmm, well you should break it off with her, it's clear that she's uncomfortable with that kind of thing and is following religion because she want's to. But, you shouldn't try and make her uncomfortable you have to respect what she believes in and know the boundaries. I'm not saying this from a religious way, it's what she believes in if she thinks it's wrong then that's what she's going to belive and not let go of it. Think about her feeling's, it would hurt her more if she realises you are doing it just for the family. :u:
Original post by Anonymous
Hey.
I'm a so called 'kafar' girl and my parents only have a vague idea that I'm not religious and since I'm really academic and general not much of a rebel or whatever they don't really mind. I fully understand thats its hard, trying to please your parents yet not wanting to adhere to their religious ideology. Its may be hard to let her go but in all honesty that probably is the best thing to do. You two are clearly polar opposites and tbh the prospect of me being with a really religious guy who doesn't even listen to music makes me want to scream, I can't imagine how you've put up with it for so long. If you're just basing in on pleasing your parents then its a bit unfair to the girl as well, undoubtedly she'd want a guy who wouldn't dare to ask her if she'd want to have sex before marriage or whatever the **** you were asking - bet that was an interesting convo lmfao :argh:
Bottom line is: you're not alone, theres plenty of like minded people, you just need to wait it out and find her. And leave the poor girl she's probably got it in her head that you two are going to get married as soon and you hit 20 and raise 5+ well behaved little muslim babies. Is that really what you want?


That's really refreshing to know that I am not the only one out there going though the same struggles. And I agree with you, she is strictly only about marriage, and has zero tolerance when it comes to music, dancing and was furious when I asked her if I could kiss her once. So I would have ended up detesting my life. :/

By the way just out of curiosity, does anyone know that you are a "kufar"?
Or are you keeping it a secret?
Original post by Anonymous
"Londons slickest" lmao ffs.
Rudeboi has mummy and daddy issues and needs a pious girl to make him look like less of a loser than already is, sick.

Stop lying to yourself and wasting everyones time.


Isn't ironic you calling me a "loser", Yet you are the troll insulting users on the web and hiding behind anon, so don't worry the mods have been alerted.
Original post by Londons slickest
That's really refreshing to know that I am not the only one out there going though the same struggles. And I agree with you, she is strictly only about marriage, and has zero tolerance when it comes to music, dancing and was furious when I asked her if I could kiss her once. So I would have ended up detesting my life. :/

By the way just out of curiosity, does anyone know that you are a "kufar"?
Or are you keeping it a secret?



My friends know and they're open minded about it, they're pretty amazing tbh. I can have open conversations with my muslim friends and they never judge, we've had pretty heated discussions before but it always ends in laughter with no hard feelings. Some people who know do judge but I tend to avoid the word atheist and just stick to laying myself as an agnostic. I know i shouldn't care what others think but its hard and i feel a weird sort of guilt when they look at me all like 'wtf is WRONG with you?' I suppose they can't help being so close minded but it is irritating af at the same time. No one in my family knows the full extent of my lack of belief but they do know that i have a tendency to ask 'but why' a thousand times:tongue:

I know that London is suppose to have a really strong Muslim community, at least thats what i know from my cousins who live in East London (I'm from Manchester btw) so maybe its just the community you're living in? What caused you to become an atheist?
u cant "pursue" her, find someone who is also trying to show off to their parents, both of you can pretend for ur in laws and live happily ever after
Stop messing with our Muslim girls. You ain't slick
Original post by Londons slickest
Yeah I need to let her go. We just aren't compatible with one another, in the long run we will just end up hating each other.

I'll stop calling and texting her from now on, and remain just friends with her.

I think that would be the best option.


Honestly i think thats the best option, i hope you find someone who makes you happy too.
Original post by Londons slickest
And these are just some of the few reasons why I have chosen to turn my back on Islam.But it is what it is.
No offence, but for you to think like that, shows that your foundation of islam is weak to begin with. This is partly your parents fault because it was there responsibility to raise you and teach you Islam correctly. I don't where your from, but i noticed it is more common for Asian Muslims to be overly strict on their children, giving them no freedom whatsoever, thus they end up despising whatever they have been taught.But to be honest, this is not the religion at fault, it is the culture, since Asians often get their culture mixed too much into their religion. i'm half European, half asian, so i have an interracial upbringing, but i will honestly say my Asian side was more stricter. However, judging by the way you speak, you were mature enough to make that decision to leave Islam when you did. so it was YOUR choice And i'm sure you didn't even try to understand Islam for your self and do your own research. sometimes there's things i hear/read, and don't agree with, and i ask someone knowledgeable, and when i get my answer, i feel relieved that i didn't believe in the media. sometimes, you will just ignore the explanation, because it didn't suit your world desires', for example that other user who kept giving you advice, yet you kept coming up with irrelevant excuses. people don't leave Islam for no reason. Things build up. perhaps, you were already listening to music and not lowering your gaze, hanging out with the wrong people, bad influences, media. the biggest factor is that Muslims see the non-Muslims around us having so much 'fun', this is temporary, and you know deep inside that its wrong. however after a while, repeating wrongs so many times, make you feel guilty less and less until the point you find it normal e.g. looking at girls and being overly friendly with them.THIS IS WHY A RELATIONSHIP WITH THE OPPOSITE GENDER IS HARRAM IN ISLAM BECAUSE IT WILL LEAD TO WORSE THINGS. And for all the people out there who say that this is a lie, why the HELL do you thing cheating/ affairs and divorce are so common in the western/non-muslim world.And please don't be stupid and say that i'm too young and have no experience, because i probably have more experience than a middle aged person and im only 17. i have lived in a Muslim country for 4 years, and a non Muslim country for 13 years. i have people who were EXTREMELY close to me turn way from Islam.i have friends that do harram (forbidden actions), but do i follow them? some talk to guys, but do i feel the need to? no. i tell them off all the time and say: would you like it if you knew your husband had played around before he married you? no right? then why are you doing the same?some wearing revealing clothes, and i proudly walk around with my abaya(long dress). you should know that its is a HUGE fashion it he middle east to show your fringe when wearing a scarf, but i dont. some Asians people in my school class are so desperate in saying they are British, when they're not because it seems so cool being from a non-Muslim country nowadays? why because everybody wants to copy the kufar. as for that girl, if you know she's so 'religious' and that your 'kufar' , why would you want to corrupt her? tbh,and i find it disgusting how you only want her to prove something to your parents. its a good thing she didn't talk to you after that.. she clearly doesnt want to be invloved with you anymore. sometimes there will be cgirls like who will aslo have horrified reations, however yhey waont ignore you beacsue they know they are too good for you, but they are strong enough to change you,. also, i hope your parents know you dont follow islam anymore. its really bad that your lying to them.
@Leah Johnson


Who are you to judge, who do you think you are?
(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 71
**** her right in the pussy!
@Leah Johnson. Actually now that I re-read what you wrote, I realise that you insulted me.

Like who are you to judge me?

Anyone with any common sense can see Islam is not logical.

I'll do what I want, if I want a hijabi to think that I am still Muslim then I will.

Regardless of what yo think, your opinion is irrelevant to me.
Reply 73
Original post by Roxy1331
...


It seems as if you yourself are not too keen on the girl so no point in being with her if you don't love her because in the future you will not be happy and neither will she be.
Reply 74
Basically, you need to find ex Muslim girl, who hasn't told her family yet.

It will be your secret, you both get to benefits of being ex Muslim, loving each other and enjoying life. Where in family you can keep pretending being Muslim.

But this time it won't be hard, because you will have each other.

Sometimes its better to keep some things hidden from elders and family.
Original post by Londons slickest
@Leah Johnson


Who are you to judge, who do you think you are?


clearly, you didn't learn anything from my long-ass HONEST message. i tried to get straight to point with you, but you are clearly too ignorant to bother listening.
you need to fix up your personality first before trying to be with someone else.

your a douche, and you know it deep down, yet you act like you aretn. again, how ignorant.

And dont EVER think you can use a girl like that again. if you want to prove your parents and relatives wrong, how about finding your own path, or trying to understand islam one more time with an OPEN mind by doing your OWN research. if you still cant accept anything, then be honest with your parents. sure, they'll get angry at first, but dont be angry back and them too because it will be alot for them to take in. just remind them that at least you were honest with them, and that other people wouldn't be as honest as you were to them, so that they can understand that it was hard for you to be open too.

its better for you to let them be angry temporarily, then let them find out later on and be angry with you forever and never speak to you again. believe me, you'll regret it later on in life for keeping such a big secret away from your own parents. but, maybe you should try to strengthen your relationship with them beforehand, so that they dont actually kill you on the day you confess. This way, they will be more understand and believe you.

if you have the guts to ask a girl inappropriate questions, i'm sure you can have the guts to tell your parents the truth about yourself.
Leave her. It'll be better for both of you.
Original post by Londons slickest
That's really refreshing to know that I am not the only one out there going though the same struggles. And I agree with you, she is strictly only about marriage, and has zero tolerance when it comes to music, dancing and was furious when I asked her if I could kiss her once. So I would have ended up detesting my life. :/

By the way just out of curiosity, does anyone know that you are a "kufar"?
Or are you keeping it a secret?


Okay for some reason the thing that i posted yesterday is STILL being checked my moderators so I'll just try to remember what i wrote yesterday. I swear to god this one better post.

My friends all know and they're hugely supportive I have muslim and non muslim friends and when ever the topic of religion comes up despite the heated arguments at times we all generally have a laugh about it, with my group and the constant roasting if you get butthurt over everything you may as well leave :h: oh and it never ends in hard feelings.

My extended family don't know the extent of my skepticism but they all know that i do have a tendency to ask 'but why' a thousand times.

Maybe its just the community you're living in that makes you feel isolated? I know what its like to live with the guilt, not wanting to pray yet not wanting your parents to feel like they didn't raise you properly. I know London does have a huge Muslim community (from what I've heard from my cousins who like there, I'm from Manchester if you were wondering) so maybe its just that.

What caused you to lose your faith in God if you don't mind me asking? I'm always interested to hear about how others became ex-muslims and what experiences they went through to cause them to leave.
Original post by Leah Johnson
clearly, you didn't learn anything from my long-ass HONEST message. i tried to get straight to point with you, but you are clearly too ignorant to bother listening.
you need to fix up your personality first before trying to be with someone else.

your a douche, and you know it deep down, yet you act like you aretn. again, how ignorant.

And dont EVER think you can use a girl like that again. if you want to prove your parents and relatives wrong, how about finding your own path, or trying to understand islam one more time with an OPEN mind by doing your OWN research. if you still cant accept anything, then be honest with your parents. sure, they'll get angry at first, but dont be angry back and them too because it will be alot for them to take in. just remind them that at least you were honest with them, and that other people wouldn't be as honest as you were to them, so that they can understand that it was hard for you to be open too.

its better for you to let them be angry temporarily, then let them find out later on and be angry with you forever and never speak to you again. believe me, you'll regret it later on in life for keeping such a big secret away from your own parents. but, maybe you should try to strengthen your relationship with them beforehand, so that they dont actually kill you on the day you confess. This way, they will be more understand and believe you.

if you have the guts to ask a girl inappropriate questions, i'm sure you can have the guts to tell your parents the truth about yourself.


My family know I have become a "kafir", that's why they look down on me. I didn't even have to tell them, they knew from my actions.

But this girl is a way for me to prove myself to them. And I will do what I want. So you and the rest of the Muslim community can insult me as much as you want. But I will use this girl to prove to my family that I have changed, and if it doesn't work between me and this girl, I will just find another hijabi.

So bye.
Original post by loveleest
And nothing annoys me more than parents that force religion onto their children.


Let's be honest, in this situation OP isn't a child. If he's looking for what appears to be a wife, then clearly he possess full autonomy and I'm more than sure his parents aren't forcing anything upon him!

Besides that, I agree with your point. Religion needs to be explored by an individual, as opposed to having religion forced upon you.

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