Muslim girls future lifestyle
Hello everyone, I thought I'd post this anonymously.
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Scroll to see replies
No you're not abnormal.
/thread
/thread
Original post by Anonymous
No you're not abnormal.
/thread
/thread
I just feel like I Am though no one understand what I want, there like when the time comes you can marry but I seriously want to now
Original post by Anonymous
Hello everyone, I thought I'd post this anonymously.
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
OP you sound just like me! like i wanna be educated and stuff but only wanna work if i need to or when my kids are old enough. life goals are having a family and staying home and raising them. people be like live life and stuff but i love the thought of having a family and staying home and stuff more. PM me. ngl it felt like i wrote this lol.
It's a possibility but you should be prepared for the reality of indeed having to work. Do you really think most people want to work? Of course they don't, but if you have no choice and have to support yourself before marriage or whatever then you'll have to.
I don't really think most people want to work, at least not the jobs they are doing, as a woman from a very traditional background you certainly have (ironically) more freedom in this domain, as if you find a traditional husband I don't think it'll be that difficult to do so. You could perhaps meet one at the mosque?
You are 100% normal. Our new society now looks down on girls like us as some weird people when a few centuries ago we would be normal lol.
I'm one of those girls that doesn't want to be a work person and more of a stay at home with the kids sort of person e.g. a housewife. It is much more rewarding.
My thoughts:
Try to get good grades at school anyways. You never know what could happen to your husband in the future. You may need to work at some point to support your family.
Learn how to be a wife. It's not too early to start. Learn how to cook a few good recipies, and keep your room clean - soon you'll be keeping your house clean :-)
Be a pleasant and caring person.
If you're going to be a housewife e.g. get married and not work outside of the house, that doesn't mean you get to be a lazy slob. If I was a guy married to a wife that stayed at home, I would want her to do all the things I couldn't do.
It seems like most guys wouldn't want to marry at this age but there may be a few.
Make sure you stay healthy, good diet and exercise, practice a loving smile, and dress respectably but well, especially in feminine clothes. I know looks aren't everything but you wouldn't go into an interview like you were dressed for the beach, would you? This will also make you more aproachable.
Even though you don't want to become a career person, you still need to be wise. Follow the news, read a lot, pursue interest and hobbies apart from regular school.
Apart from that you may just accept that you're going to have to work. It is the way the world works now, ladies don't get to stay at home anymore. Your boyfriend may also not want to get married until you are 30, everyone gets married late these days.
Good luck :-)
I'm one of those girls that doesn't want to be a work person and more of a stay at home with the kids sort of person e.g. a housewife. It is much more rewarding.
My thoughts:
Try to get good grades at school anyways. You never know what could happen to your husband in the future. You may need to work at some point to support your family.
Learn how to be a wife. It's not too early to start. Learn how to cook a few good recipies, and keep your room clean - soon you'll be keeping your house clean :-)
Be a pleasant and caring person.
If you're going to be a housewife e.g. get married and not work outside of the house, that doesn't mean you get to be a lazy slob. If I was a guy married to a wife that stayed at home, I would want her to do all the things I couldn't do.
It seems like most guys wouldn't want to marry at this age but there may be a few.
Make sure you stay healthy, good diet and exercise, practice a loving smile, and dress respectably but well, especially in feminine clothes. I know looks aren't everything but you wouldn't go into an interview like you were dressed for the beach, would you? This will also make you more aproachable.
Even though you don't want to become a career person, you still need to be wise. Follow the news, read a lot, pursue interest and hobbies apart from regular school.
Apart from that you may just accept that you're going to have to work. It is the way the world works now, ladies don't get to stay at home anymore. Your boyfriend may also not want to get married until you are 30, everyone gets married late these days.
Good luck :-)
Original post by Anonymous
Hello everyone, I thought I'd post this anonymously.
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Original post by VioletFeather
You are 100% normal. Our new society now looks down on girls like us as some weird people when a few centuries ago we would be normal lol.
I'm one of those girls that doesn't want to be a work person and more of a stay at home with the kids sort of person e.g. a housewife. It is much more rewarding.
My thoughts:
Try to get good grades at school anyways. You never know what could happen to your husband in the future. You may need to work at some point to support your family.
Learn how to be a wife. It's not too early to start. Learn how to cook a few good recipies, and keep your room clean - soon you'll be keeping your house clean :-)
Be a pleasant and caring person.
If you're going to be a housewife e.g. get married and not work outside of the house, that doesn't mean you get to be a lazy slob. If I was a guy married to a wife that stayed at home, I would want her to do all the things I couldn't do.
It seems like most guys wouldn't want to marry at this age but there may be a few.
Make sure you stay healthy, good diet and exercise, practice a loving smile, and dress respectably but well, especially in feminine clothes. I know looks aren't everything but you wouldn't go into an interview like you were dressed for the beach, would you? This will also make you more aproachable.
Even though you don't want to become a career person, you still need to be wise. Follow the news, read a lot, pursue interest and hobbies apart from regular school.
Apart from that you may just accept that you're going to have to work. It is the way the world works now, ladies don't get to stay at home anymore. Your boyfriend may also not want to get married until you are 30, everyone gets married late these days.
Good luck :-)
I'm one of those girls that doesn't want to be a work person and more of a stay at home with the kids sort of person e.g. a housewife. It is much more rewarding.
My thoughts:
Try to get good grades at school anyways. You never know what could happen to your husband in the future. You may need to work at some point to support your family.
Learn how to be a wife. It's not too early to start. Learn how to cook a few good recipies, and keep your room clean - soon you'll be keeping your house clean :-)
Be a pleasant and caring person.
If you're going to be a housewife e.g. get married and not work outside of the house, that doesn't mean you get to be a lazy slob. If I was a guy married to a wife that stayed at home, I would want her to do all the things I couldn't do.
It seems like most guys wouldn't want to marry at this age but there may be a few.
Make sure you stay healthy, good diet and exercise, practice a loving smile, and dress respectably but well, especially in feminine clothes. I know looks aren't everything but you wouldn't go into an interview like you were dressed for the beach, would you? This will also make you more aproachable.
Even though you don't want to become a career person, you still need to be wise. Follow the news, read a lot, pursue interest and hobbies apart from regular school.
Apart from that you may just accept that you're going to have to work. It is the way the world works now, ladies don't get to stay at home anymore. Your boyfriend may also not want to get married until you are 30, everyone gets married late these days.
Good luck :-)
Wait you're a woman? Rather refreshing attitude, a lot of work is completely unrewarding so I haven't a clue why so many people rush out to fight for it as their God given right. It always seems to focus on 'I can become the president now', not really since there still hasn't been one, and women worked in congress in the 1940s already.
I have no idea why people seem to think education isn't consistent with this position either, women 60 years ago may not have had gentleman skills but they did have a lot more manual and social skills.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Hello everyone, I thought I'd post this anonymously.
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?
You're not abnormal at all.
In Islam the man has to provide for his wife and she is not required to work. I know many people including myself who would want a wife like that. So dw there are plenty of people with the same views.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by s_ahmed2
You're not abnormal at all.
In Islam the man has to provide for his wife and she is not required to work. I know many people including myself who would want a wife like that. So dw there are plenty of people with the same views.
Posted from TSR Mobile
In Islam the man has to provide for his wife and she is not required to work. I know many people including myself who would want a wife like that. So dw there are plenty of people with the same views.
Posted from TSR Mobile
I'm not Muslim but i'd prefer my wife to have the choice of not working as well, if she wanted to by all means she can do so.
why are you worrying about this at the moment? its ages away i would rather concentrate on my studies and get a qualification 
working isn't a bad thing, neither staying at home and do cleaning.... personally, i am opposite to you... i would rather to a job than cleaning 
but everything depends on the situation i always make plans but it never fits in the situation 
don't worry too much about this atm... enjoy your uni life (think you are in uni
)
i would rather concentrate on my studies and get a qualification working isn't a bad thing, neither staying at home and do cleaning.... personally, i am opposite to you... i would rather to a job than cleaning but everything depends on the situation i always make plans but it never fits in the situation don't worry too much about this atm... enjoy your uni life (think you are in uni
)Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob
I'm not Muslim but i'd prefer my wife to have the choice of not working as well, if she wanted to by all means she can do so.
TBF if the husband did not want her to work then she'd have to respect his view. There is no need for her to work.
Original post by fatima1998
why are you worrying about this at the moment? its ages away i would rather concentrate on my studies and get a qualification working isn't a bad thing, neither staying at home and do cleaning.... personally, i am opposite to you... i would rather to a job than cleaning but everything depends on the situation i always make plans but it never fits in the situation
don't worry too much about this atm... enjoy your uni life (think you are in uni)
i would rather concentrate on my studies and get a qualification working isn't a bad thing, neither staying at home and do cleaning.... personally, i am opposite to you... i would rather to a job than cleaning but everything depends on the situation i always make plans but it never fits in the situation don't worry too much about this atm... enjoy your uni life (think you are in uni
)Depends if you work as a cleaner, also how many emojis?!?!?!?
Original post by Leukocyte
TBF if the husband did not want her to work then she'd have to respect his view. There is no need for her to work.
I suppose this is the issue I have, while there is no need for her to work, and if she didn't want to i'd rather her not, there's absolutely no way I would force her not to as some form of 'respect' sounds a bit rapey.
Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob
I'm not Muslim but i'd prefer my wife to have the choice of not working as well, if she wanted to by all means she can do so.
I agree with you, thats why the husband and the wife have marriage discussions before marriage, to talk about these things.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob
Depends if you work as a cleaner, also how many emojis?!?!?!?
who works as a cleaner?
and whats wrong with my emojis? love using them... 
Original post by DanteTheDoorKnob
I suppose this is the issue I have, while there is no need for her to work, and if she didn't want to i'd rather her not, there's absolutely no way I would force her not to as some form of 'respect' sounds a bit rapey.
I suppose this is the issue I have, while there is no need for her to work, and if she didn't want to i'd rather her not, there's absolutely no way I would force her not to as some form of 'respect' sounds a bit rapey.
How does rape correlate to not working?
[QUOTE=Anonymous;64795227]Hello everyone, I thought I'd post this anonymously.
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?girl!!!! who said that u r abnormal ur parents r forcing u to work so that u can be independent and believe me in Asia today people look fr girls who r more educates because they want there generations to be educated too
just wait fr a little while cuz i know ur parents r doing this fr ur own good
Basically if like some advice cause I'm a bit confused. Im a Muslim Asian girl and I'm eighteen years old, I have a different set of ideas as to the way I'd like to live my life to other girls my age. Like I'm not that into working and stuff, and I'd rather just go uni and then not work, only being educated as a back up like if I really need to work one day.Thing is I want to get married and have kids, that's what I want to do, and I don't really want to work. But my mother has told me I have to work because no one can afford anything otherwise, but can't I not work and just stay at home and cook and clean and my husband go to work? Do people still do that?
Also I don't know how I'd find someone because I don't know many people, so that's a problem as well.
But I'm getting depressed at the moment, cause I really don't want to work that much, I don't mind a degree that's interesting but straight after that I want marriage. No one seems to understand, am I abnormal?girl!!!! who said that u r abnormal ur parents r forcing u to work so that u can be independent and believe me in Asia today people look fr girls who r more educates because they want there generations to be educated too
just wait fr a little while cuz i know ur parents r doing this fr ur own good (edited 7 years ago)
Original post by fatima1998
who works as a cleaner? and whats wrong with my emojis? love using them...
and whats wrong with my emojis? love using them... My uni cleaner did.
Original post by Leukocyte
How does rape correlate to not working?
Force. Forcing her not to work. It sounds controlling and manipulating, like you want to keep her in the house so she doesn't meet other guys or something.
There should always be a choice.
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