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why is it whenever a girl likes me i always push them away?

Like literally an time a girl likes me I always get really defensive and either end up ignoring them or being outright mean to them.

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Why you feel like that?
very meanie of you :naughty: what if someone do the same thing to you - you will feel their pain :cute:
Fear?
I can sorta see where you're coming from. I'm not mean to them, but for some reason I find it really offputting when girls are interested in me. Like I'll have feelings for her, but as soon as it seems they may be reciprocated, I'll immediately start to push myself away :s-smilie:
Reject them before "reject" you? :s-smilie:

Experienced tons of rejection in the past, or something? Its a common defense mechanism.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Why you feel like that?
I don't even know tbh, I for some weird reason don't have the ability to feel romantic attraction to somebody so when someone shows feelings for me I kind of find it creepy.
Original post by SmileyVibe
Reject them before "reject" you? :s-smilie:

Experienced tons of rejection in the past, or something? Its a common defense mechanism.

Nope not really I've never really asked anyone out
Original post by blackstar101204
I don't even know tbh, I for some weird reason don't have the ability to feel romantic attraction to somebody so when someone shows feelings for me I kind of find it creepy.


Aww bless you :smile:
Maybe this is not the time for you. And maybe you will develop these feelings when you truly find someone you like inside and out.
Original post by Anonymous
I can sorta see where you're coming from. I'm not mean to them, but for some reason I find it really offputting when girls are interested in me. Like I'll have feelings for her, but as soon as it seems they may be reciprocated, I'll immediately start to push myself away :s-smilie:


Yeah its exactly like you describe it, when girls start finding you attractive it starts to feel kinda gross
Original post by Id and Ego seek
Fear?

Yeah you're probably right
Original post by blackstar101204
Yeah its exactly like you describe it, when girls start finding you attractive it starts to feel kinda gross


At the risk of sounding like an armchair psychologist, how do you view yourself?
I mean in terms of attractiveness and self worth?
Original post by blackstar101204
Yeah you're probably right

you gotta put yourself out there tho
Original post by Anonymous
At the risk of sounding like an armchair psychologist, how do you view yourself?
I mean in terms of attractiveness and self worth?

Just kind of average really
Pride
Protection
Self-indulgence
Trauma
Self-hate
etc.

I don't know man, could be a lot of things. You need to talk it over with a good friend.
Original post by blackstar101204
Just kind of average really


How was your relationship with your mother? :holmes:

Spoiler

Original post by Anonymous
How was your relationship with your mother? :holmes:

Spoiler


l think you may actually have a point there tbh. Like once this girl gave me condom, (i heard rumours that she like me and she was always trying to get my attention) anyway my mum found the condom in my blazer pocket and then she said to me that this girl is using you, she doesnt really like you she thinks that because your black that by having sex with you its like having sex with a gorillla (not lying lol she actuallly said this) pretty much any time i socialise with people in any form she always tells me that i am wasting my time and that these people are not really my friends, they just use me and that I have no real friends. When i was teenager and i used to get invited to parties my mum would always say that i couldnt go because i would be the only black person at a party and all the white people wanted me there so that they could make fun of me (this literally never happened when i went to a party) Basically \ny girl thats ever been around me my mum would always tell me that they are trashy and that for whatever reason she needs to go
Original post by blackstar101204
l think you may actually have a point there tbh. Like once this girl gave me condom, (i heard rumours that she like me and she was always trying to get my attention) anyway my mum found the condom in my blazer pocket and then she said to me that this girl is using you, she doesnt really like you she thinks that because your black that by having sex with you its like having sex with a gorillla (not lying lol she actuallly said this) pretty much any time i socialise with people in any form she always tells me that i am wasting my time and that these people are not really my friends, they just use me and that I have no real friends. When i was teenager and i used to get invited to parties my mum would always say that i couldnt go because i would be the only black person at a party and all the white people wanted me there so that they could make fun of me (this literally never happened when i went to a party) Basically \ny girl thats ever been around me my mum would always tell me that they are trashy and that for whatever reason she needs to go


i think you might have autism
Original post by blackstar101204
Like literally an time a girl likes me I always get really defensive and either end up ignoring them or being outright mean to them.


What advantages, if any, do you see in forming a romantic relationship?

What would you like to change, if anything, about your reserve?
Original post by Davide_online
What advantages, if any, do you see in forming a romantic relationship?

What would you like to change, if anything, about your reserve?


That's the thing, i don't really see any advantage in it (at least for me anyway)

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