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Is 22 yo a late age to just START looking to get married ? ( Muslim)

I'm 22 everyone around me are married. And I am not yet in a relationship. I don't know what to do
help please

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No /thread
Nah you'll be fine
Nope sorry, you've missed the cut-off point . Most of us started looking to get married when we were 13/14 so I'd probably just give up now if I were you.
Definitely not. I'm 23 and I don't expect to get married until 25 at the earliest. Only Allah knows when it'll actually happen though :smile:
Are you a girl or a guy btw? And i'm assuming your background is Asian, yea? There tends to be a lot of pressure to get married pretty young in Asian cultures :/
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Definitely not. I'm 23 and I don't expect to get married until 25 at the earliest. Only Allah knows when it'll actually happen though :smile:
Are you a girl or a guy btw? And i'm assuming your background is Asian, yea? There tends to be a lot of pressure to get married pretty young in Asian cultures :/


I'm a girl, yeah it's the reason why I'm worried. And I'm worried that after a certain age I will be no longer suitable for being a wife.
Reply 6
Original post by NickLCFC
Nope sorry, you've missed the cut-off point . Most of us started looking to get married when we were 13/14 so I'd probably just give up now if I were you.


13/14?!! wOw guys are so lucky !!
Girls start looking at 11/12
Depends who you ask...according to most 40+ Pakistani women, if you're a female you hit your expiry date at 25...if you're not married by then you've no chance. If you're a male, you're fine, don't worry.

I personally don't think it's late at all...you may not even actively start looking for a spouse and they'll come your way...you can't rush these things.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm a girl, yeah it's the reason why I'm worried. And I'm worried that after a certain age I will be no longer suitable for being a wife.


No longer suitable for being a wife? What exactly does that mean? What are you, a carton of milk that has an expiry date? Trust me, these worries are all culturally based and come from a time when the only use for a woman was to have babies. Girl, you are more than just a body and the only time you should get married is when you want to (or if a guy who you feel is suitable, asks for your hand). Marriage is to give you companionship and support. The last thing you should do is feel pressured to get married (to someone who might not even suit you) just to keep the aunty-jees happy. It's your life, not theirs :smile:
Reply 9
Original post by Biryani007
Depends who you ask...according to most 40+ Pakistani women, if you're a female you hit your expiry date at 25...if you're not married by then you've no chance. If you're a male, you're fine, don't worry.

I personally don't think it's late at all...you may not even actively start looking for a spouse and they'll come your way...you can't rush these things.



Dunno, if I don't take actions no-one will be aware that I exist. I can't just stay at home revising for my exams and wish someone will find me. :frown:

My parents don't arrange marriages ( I'm Arab it's a bit different than Asians families).

I 'm worried because I feel 25 will come soon, since you hit 20, years are like months.I don't know what to do
I'm a 21 year old guy and I ain't getting married anytime soon
Original post by Anonymous
I'm a 21 year old guy and I ain't getting married anytime soon


what do you think is a good age to get married ?

And for a girl which age ?
nope, i'm planning to get married during uni at 23 (nik'ah) and then finish my degree to have the actual wedding! it's all poppy about "You're too old" if thats the case, then why did the Prophet (SAW) the greatest man to walk this earth marry a woman who was much older than him? Just don't worry, when you feel ready, go ahead, it's half your deen you'd be completing and think of who you will marry wisely! May Allah help you <3
Original post by VETwannabe
No longer suitable for being a wife? What exactly does that mean? What are you, a carton of milk that has an expiry date? Trust me, these worries are all culturally based and come from a time when the only use for a woman was to have babies. Girl, you are more than just a body and the only time you should get married is when you want to (or if a guy who you feel is suitable, asks for your hand). Marriage is to give you companionship and support. The last thing you should do is feel pressured to get married (to someone who might not even suit you) just to keep the aunty-jees happy. It's your life, not theirs :smile:


The problem is that even if I disagree with this shitty cultural based age expiry, I don't want a life single. I look forward to have a family etc. So if I hit this age everyone around me will think I'm too old ( that's though but true). People around me follow these cultural things, which I hope will change in the next generations
Original post by Anonymous
Dunno, if I don't take actions no-one will be aware that I exist. I can't just stay at home revising for my exams and wish someone will find me. :frown:

My parents don't arrange marriages ( I'm Arab it's a bit different than Asians families).

I 'm worried because I feel 25 will come soon, since you hit 20, years are like months.I don't know what to do


Isn't there anyone in uni you could get to know? See if you like eachother and would like to get married?
Reply 15
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 22 everyone around me are married. And I am not yet in a relationship. I don't know what to do
help please

You still got a good 3-4 years, you might as well start looking and then get married but do ask and consult your parents and no your not to old... It's better to get married slightly later so your mature and your husband is older and more mature and stable and all that. Good luck finding a husband.
Original post by VETwannabe
No longer suitable for being a wife? What exactly does that mean? What are you, a carton of milk that has an expiry date? Trust me, these worries are all culturally based and come from a time when the only use for a woman was to have babies. Girl, you are more than just a body and the only time you should get married is when you want to (or if a guy who you feel is suitable, asks for your hand). Marriage is to give you companionship and support. The last thing you should do is feel pressured to get married (to someone who might not even suit you) just to keep the aunty-jees happy. It's your life, not theirs :smile:


someone with actual sense 100% agree :smile:
my brother got married at 24, my friend is due to marry in a week at 22, so definitely hope mate!
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 22 everyone around me are married. And I am not yet in a relationship. I don't know what to do
help please


22 actually is way young
Original post by Anonymous
The problem is that even if I disagree with this shitty cultural based age expiry, I don't want a life single. I look forward to have a family etc. So if I hit this age everyone around me will think I'm too old ( that's though but true). People around me follow these cultural things, which I hope will change in the next generations


Yea I get your dilemma. It's not easy to just do your own thing when everyone around you is married and doing what's culturally expected of them. Can I ask you a question, are you a Muslim? See because I am, and the reason why I don't have this same fear that you do (trust me when I say that I can't wait to get married and have my own family either), is because I have so much faith in Allah's plan. I'm 100% convinced that he's going to sort me out with a husband, whenever he decides is the right time. And even if I don't get married in this life, I believe 100% that he'll sort me out in the next life. I suppose it also helps that I actually have two aunts who never got married and actually stayed single so they could look after my grandma (until she passed away last year - may Allah have mercy on her). They were so good to her that I know that their efforts won't go to waste.

For me it helps that I'm as spiritual as I am. If my beliefs weren't as strong as they are, then I would probably be in a similar state of apprehension as you. But also, I do have some worries too. My parents moved here from 'back home' whereas I was born here, so we don't really have the same views on 'how' exactly I'm supposed to approach marriage (my mum wants me to just sit and wait for a guy to magically 'find' me, bless her). for the time being, I have other things that I'm focussing on, but I know that eventually it's going to come up and I'm going to just have to tell them what I think. so I agree with you and also hope that things will get better for the future generations.

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