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Original post by bieberfever
Ok long story short; I'm a Sikh and my boyfriend is Hindu, he's 20 and I'm 21. Obviously we want to be together but he says his family are strict when it comes to marrying out of caste and religion so he suggested we break up before it becomes even harder. I completely understand but i know that we both know this isn't a childish crush, and now I don't know what to do...
Posted from TSR Mobile
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I really didn't that hindus have problems with marrying sikhs. Its kinda common practice. They could probably ask you to learn more about their culture though.
And the caste thing is ********, one of the stains in Indian culture. Have you met his family, did you get an impression when visiting them that they are that backward? Sometimes, people make excuses to break-up, I sincerely hope that your boyfriend is not pulling this off to do so.
...
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by bieberfever
Ok long story short; I'm a Sikh and my boyfriend is Hindu, he's 20 and I'm 21. Obviously we want to be together but he says his family are strict when it comes to marrying out of caste and religion so he suggested we break up before it becomes even harder. I completely understand but i know that we both know this isn't a childish crush, and now I don't know what to do...
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Anonymous
I really didn't that hindus have problems with marrying sikhs. Its kinda common practice. They could probably ask you to learn more about their culture though.
And the caste thing is ********, one of the stains in Indian culture. Have you met his family, did you get an impression when visiting them that they are that backward? Sometimes, people make excuses to break-up, I sincerely hope that your boyfriend is not pulling this off to do so.
And the caste thing is ********, one of the stains in Indian culture. Have you met his family, did you get an impression when visiting them that they are that backward? Sometimes, people make excuses to break-up, I sincerely hope that your boyfriend is not pulling this off to do so.
Ngl that's sort of what I was thinking.
Unless the boy's parents are particularly backward, Hindus generally don't seem to have a problem marrying Sikhs and marriages between the 2 communities have been common place for a long time especially in Punjab.
OP, are your families from different regions/states of India? Like I'm assuming your family is from Punjab and your boyfriend's family could be from Gujarat or Tamil Nadu or somewhere else.
In which case, yeah, that could also raise some issues since cultures as well as castes vary from region to region.
deleted
(edited 6 years ago)
Nah, I dont think its an excuse, I think you underestimate how much of a part of his culture it is. For first generation (so his parents i assume) definitely, in India its completely different - they have different entrances depending on your caste. You can be kicked out of the family based on this traditionally, its part of hinduism. They believe the lower castes are there to serve them. Its not because you're sikh, its cos of your caste - some sikhs are high caste and hence they would have no problem with it. Obviously this is all a little backwards and its definitely wrong but its the way things are. Literally, I know someone who uses different plates when guests are round depending on their caste - and it's not uncommon. Weren't you aware of the caste system?
To be honest though, its weird that he would give up so easily, cause usually the next generation don't care about caste etc. Unless his parents have drilled it into his head.
To be honest though, its weird that he would give up so easily, cause usually the next generation don't care about caste etc. Unless his parents have drilled it into his head.
Original post by Aykem
Nah, I dont think its an excuse, I think you underestimate how much of a part of his culture it is. For first generation (so his parents i assume) definitely, in India its completely different - they have different entrances depending on your caste. You can be kicked out of the family based on this traditionally, its part of hinduism. They believe the lower castes are there to serve them. Its not because you're sikh, its cos of your caste - some sikhs are high caste and hence they would have no problem with it. Obviously this is all a little backwards and its definitely wrong but its the way things are. Literally, I know someone who uses different plates when guests are round depending on their caste - and it's not uncommon. Weren't you aware of the caste system?
To be honest though, its weird that he would give up so easily, cause usually the next generation don't care about caste etc. Unless his parents have drilled it into his head.
To be honest though, its weird that he would give up so easily, cause usually the next generation don't care about caste etc. Unless his parents have drilled it into his head.
I'd agree that it's a problem with Hindu society as a whole, but I don't think that you could claim the central teachings of Hinduism (from the main scriptures) actually teach that.
"No one is superior or inferior; all are like siblings; and should strive for the interest and progress for all." (Rig Veda 5.60.5)
“When one beholds one and the same Absolute existing equally in every being, one does not injure anybody; because one considers everything as one’s own Self.” (Bhagavad Gita Ch.13Verse 28)
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by bieberfever
Ok long story short; I'm a Sikh and my boyfriend is Hindu, he's 20 and I'm 21. Obviously we want to be together but he says his family are strict when it comes to marrying out of caste and religion so he suggested we break up before it becomes even harder. I completely understand but i know that we both know this isn't a childish crush, and now I don't know what to do...
The caste system will never end if people refuse to go against it.
Original post by nucdev
I'd agree that it's a problem with Hindu society as a whole, but I don't think that you could claim the central teachings of Hinduism (from the main scriptures) actually teach that.
"No one is superior or inferior; all are like siblings; and should strive for the interest and progress for all." (Rig Veda 5.60.5)
“When one beholds one and the same Absolute existing equally in every being, one does not injure anybody; because one considers everything as one’s own Self.” (Bhagavad Gita Ch.13Verse 28)
"No one is superior or inferior; all are like siblings; and should strive for the interest and progress for all." (Rig Veda 5.60.5)
“When one beholds one and the same Absolute existing equally in every being, one does not injure anybody; because one considers everything as one’s own Self.” (Bhagavad Gita Ch.13Verse 28)
Originally the caste system was meant to be different groups with equally important roles, but nowadays they don't seem to acknowledge that.
Original post by nucdev
I'd agree that it's a problem with Hindu society, but I don't think that you could claim the central teachings of Hinduism (from the scriptures of authority) actually teach that.
There is a chain or status, no? Have you been to India a lot? I agree it may be a part of culture but its centrally important to how many Hindus lead their lives and its the foundation for society in India. Its taught by religious leaders as the reward for leading a good life in reincarnation. There are also many scriptures that form hinduism and no ranked top book. Rig Veda, one of the sacred scriptures dictates that Purush was destroyed to form society and humans were made from different parts of his body - Brahmans; the head, Sudras the feet (and all the intermediates). Thats the most common origin story I know of. (Sorry if I droned on, its a particular area of interest/study
)The caste thing seems to be a bit stricter down South India, as my parents insist that the same caste is one of the requirements for a girl I want to marry, but I think if his parents are a BIT lenient, they shouldn't care about caste over their son's happiness. I think my parents would allow me to marry outside of caste if I truly wanted to marry this person
Break up with him. Well if he's willing to lose love just for a silly reason like that. I'm Hindu Punjabi and my whole big family have married all sorts of cultures despite my grandparents being strict. At the start it's a big drama but it's so worth it if you love the person. There's Sikhs, Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Buddhists and all sorts in my family. I'm 16 and my boyfriends 20 and half cast. Basically, everything will be fine. All this marrying only your own has been conditioned into us. It actually doesn't matter. If you love eachother f castes and religions. Be multi cultured and tell his family to learn to live with it. Also, how long have you even been dating?
Original post by Aykem
There is a chain or status, no? Have you been to India a lot? I agree it may be a part of culture but its centrally important to how many Hindus lead their lives and its the foundation for society in India. Its taught by religious leaders as the reward for leading a good life in reincarnation. There are also many scriptures that form hinduism and no ranked top book. Rig Veda, one of the sacred scriptures dictates that Purush was destroyed to form society and humans were made from different parts of his body - Brahmans; the head, Sudras the feet (and all the intermediates). Thats the most common origin story I know of. (Sorry if I droned on, its a particular area of interest/study )
)This. We are all parts of one thing, and without one part, we cannot function properly as a society, hence why we are all SUPPOSED to be equal.
Original post by Kajsajbas
Break up with him. Well if he's willing to lose love just for a silly reason like that. I'm Hindu Punjabi and my whole big family have married all sorts of cultures despite my grandparents being strict. At the start it's a big drama but it's so worth it if you love the person. There's Sikhs, Hindus, Muslims, Christians, Buddhists and all sorts in my family. I'm 16 and my boyfriends 20 and half cast. Basically, everything will be fine. All this marrying only your own has been conditioned into us. It actually doesn't matter. If you love eachother f castes and religions. Be multi cultured and tell his family to learn to live with it. Also, how long have you even been dating?
You don't understand. This guy probably cares a lot about his family, and can't just tell them to piss off if they don't like the marriage. It'd go against the very fiber of his being.
Can someone explain to me what it is with Indians and caste? Is it purely a characteristic of the Hindu religion or is it more of a cultural thing?
Original post by longshot100
Originally the caste system was meant to be different groups with equally important roles, but nowadays they don't seem to acknowledge that.
True, but that wasn't "caste system" as such, but "Varna" system which depended on ability and deeds rather than birth (which is what the modern caste system is)
Original post by Aykem
There is a chain or status, no? Have you been to India a lot? I agree it may be a part of culture but its centrally important to how many Hindus lead their lives and its the foundation for society in India. Its taught by religious leaders as the reward for leading a good life in reincarnation. There are also many scriptures that form hinduism and no ranked top book. Rig Veda, one of the sacred scriptures dictates that Purush was destroyed to form society and humans were made from different parts of his body - Brahmans; the head, Sudras the feet (and all the intermediates). Thats the most common origin story I know of. (Sorry if I droned on, its a particular area of interest/study )
)I am a Hindu lol and have done research into this.
And I've heard plenty of religious leaders who vehemently disagree with the whole reward for reincarnation bit as well.
That Purusha Sukta hymn in the Rig Veda talks of Varna which is NOT based on birth, but aptitude, ability and character.
Also, the vast majority of Sanskrit scholars consider that verse to be a medieval insertion into the Rig Veda.
But let me ask you a counter question - which organ of your body is more important for survival? The brain or the heart?
Your logic would indicate that the brain is more important since it is at the top, but we both know that the brain cannot survive without the heart (which is lower down) pumping and supplying blood to the brain.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by nucdev
I'd agree that it's a problem with Hindu society as a whole, but I don't think that you could claim the central teachings of Hinduism (from the main scriptures) actually teach that.
"No one is superior or inferior; all are like siblings; and should strive for the interest and progress for all." (Rig Veda 5.60.5)
“When one beholds one and the same Absolute existing equally in every being, one does not injure anybody; because one considers everything as one’s own Self.” (Bhagavad Gita Ch.13Verse 28)
"No one is superior or inferior; all are like siblings; and should strive for the interest and progress for all." (Rig Veda 5.60.5)
“When one beholds one and the same Absolute existing equally in every being, one does not injure anybody; because one considers everything as one’s own Self.” (Bhagavad Gita Ch.13Verse 28)
The caste system was probably the results of the numerous invasions of India by western peoples, from the Aryans and the Greeks to the British, that "whitened" the ruling classes.
Original post by nucdev
True, but that wasn't "caste system" as such, but "Varna" system which depended on ability and deeds rather than birth (which is what the modern caste system is)
I am a Hindu lol and have done research into this.
And I've heard plenty of religious leaders who vehemently disagree with the whole reward for reincarnation bit as well.
That Purusha Sukta hymn in the Rig Veda talks of Varna which is NOT based on birth, but aptitude, ability and character.
Also, the vast majority of Sanskrit scholars consider that verse to be a medieval insertion into the Rig Veda.
But let me ask you a counter question - which organ of your body is more important for survival? The brain or the heart?
Your logic would indicate that the brain is more important since it is at the top, but we both know that the brain cannot survive without the heart (which is lower down) pumping and supplying blood to the brain.
I am a Hindu lol and have done research into this.
And I've heard plenty of religious leaders who vehemently disagree with the whole reward for reincarnation bit as well.
That Purusha Sukta hymn in the Rig Veda talks of Varna which is NOT based on birth, but aptitude, ability and character.
Also, the vast majority of Sanskrit scholars consider that verse to be a medieval insertion into the Rig Veda.
But let me ask you a counter question - which organ of your body is more important for survival? The brain or the heart?
Your logic would indicate that the brain is more important since it is at the top, but we both know that the brain cannot survive without the heart (which is lower down) pumping and supplying blood to the brain.
Yeah I completely agree, all parts are needed for a whole. Personally, I know the same but I'm talking about the mpst popular belief/practices. I come from a mixed family, not Hindu myself but my uncles/cousins are. But just as in modern capitalism, for society to function in a hierarchy, there are people who lose out, of course it would be taken for the base level to be less important by modern day Hindus. In the OPs situation, the parents wouldn't be following this logic, the majority of practicing Hindus that I know at least tend to follow the superior/inferior standard. And again, this is apparent in society not just debating over the origin - it still happens and many believe its just. The opinion that everyone is equal, as far as I can see, is not the opinion of the majority of Hindus, wrong though it may be.
My logic isn't that the brain is more important; that's the most common interpretation, which I disagree with.
It's some confused ishhhh lmao
Basically, the Hindu scriptures such as the Bhagavad Gita talked about a four fold division of labour based on aptitude/character, "Varna" (i.e.: if your inherent nature/aptitude was that of a teacher, then you were encouraged to take on that role in society), but they were all considered to be fundamentally equal (my post above quoting a verse from the Gita).
Somehow it got mixed with this other system of determining birth/lineage (called Jaati) which is NOT sanctioned in the Hindu scriptures of authority and it basically turned into this nasty, oppressive and hierarchical system.
Basically, the Hindu scriptures such as the Bhagavad Gita talked about a four fold division of labour based on aptitude/character, "Varna" (i.e.: if your inherent nature/aptitude was that of a teacher, then you were encouraged to take on that role in society), but they were all considered to be fundamentally equal (my post above quoting a verse from the Gita).
Somehow it got mixed with this other system of determining birth/lineage (called Jaati) which is NOT sanctioned in the Hindu scriptures of authority and it basically turned into this nasty, oppressive and hierarchical system.
Original post by nucdev
It's some confused ishhhh lmao
Basically, the Hindu scriptures such as the Bhagavad Gita talked about a four fold division of labour based on aptitude/character, "Varna" (i.e.: if your inherent nature/aptitude was that of a teacher, then you were encouraged to take on that role in society), but they were all considered to be fundamentally equal (my post above quoting a verse from the Gita).
Somehow it got mixed with this other system of determining birth/lineage (called Jaati) which is NOT sanctioned in the Hindu scriptures of authority and it basically turned into this nasty, oppressive and hierarchical system.
Basically, the Hindu scriptures such as the Bhagavad Gita talked about a four fold division of labour based on aptitude/character, "Varna" (i.e.: if your inherent nature/aptitude was that of a teacher, then you were encouraged to take on that role in society), but they were all considered to be fundamentally equal (my post above quoting a verse from the Gita).
Somehow it got mixed with this other system of determining birth/lineage (called Jaati) which is NOT sanctioned in the Hindu scriptures of authority and it basically turned into this nasty, oppressive and hierarchical system.
Ah, so the caste system is not of the Hindu religion in origin?
Where does 'Jaati' come from, then?
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