I think you're mistaking affection and love. I understand you, since it's a common issue with a lot of people, so it's quite logical that a person like you feels this way.
You are in love with him. You say so, and you prove so on a daily level. You initiate meetings, you plan and think about your holiday activities and you do whatever you can to assure him of your feelings. Your boyfriend however, feels affection. He feels nice when he's with you and enjoys you as an abstract idea, but not as an actual, living person. He will, by your own accord, promise big and deliver little and will sparsely be able to reciprocate your feelings. You however, due to the fact that you're in love, project nonexistent qualities onto him and hope he'll actually become like so.
I highly doubt it will change with him. Therefore, you'll either have to accept that you're simply "a" girlfriend, but for you, he is "the" boyfriend, or you'll have to confront him and talk to him about it. Good luck.