Why Do Girls Go For Guys Who Treat Them Like Crap?
When I was in year 7 I noticed the guys that treated girls the worst had the most.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
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I think it must have something to do with the whole 'you want something you can't have' thing? I assume those girls, without even realising it perhaps, likd the guys even more when they're rude to them because they want them to be kinder buttttt when they have that, they don't have anything to strive for so get bored.
Original post by Anonymous
When I was in year 7 I noticed the guys that treated girls the worst had the most.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
coz they're boring
Original post by Anonymous
When I was in year 7 I noticed the guys that treated girls the worst had the most.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
So now, unfortunately and with a degree of reluctance, I found that girls pay attention to me more the worse I treat them.
These aren't horrible things, just things like being bossy, aggressive personality, ignoring them for periods, making them jealous over other girls etc.
In fact once I had an argument with a girl arguing about something stupid. I remember saying someone like 'why don't you go and find someone nice then?' and she replied something along the lines of 'coz they're boring'.
So girls tell me, why would you want to put up with a guy who treats you like crap as opposed to a decent guy who will treat you good?
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
Because most guys that claim to be 'decent guys' are actually jerks too but they still think they are nice guys and should be entitled to girls and get pissy when they get 'friendzoned' and that is annoying and exhausting.
At least ******* guys embrace it.
Plus, girls get socialised from a young age in the sense that 'if he teases you it means he likes you'. Girls get taught on the playground that that kind of behaviour is something they should want and it gets continued into teen years/adulthood. It's messed up, but it's what girls get taught and it gets reinforced and it means guys get away with it when they get older too.
The guys that usually come out with this nonsense usually have other things holding them back (issues)...it's easier to label girls as being in the wrong for rejecting these 'nice guys' than to face their issues...everyone likes nice people.
Obviously cuz nice guys make them feel smothered and it seems like the guy is NOT in control.
Girls like a man that stands behinds his words, doesn't care what people think and clearly has balls. If that means being a pr*ck so be it, at least we get the booty
Girls like a man that stands behinds his words, doesn't care what people think and clearly has balls. If that means being a pr*ck so be it, at least we get the booty
Original post by wickedisgood
Because most guys that claim to be 'decent guys' are actually jerks too but they still think they are nice guys and should be entitled to girls and get pissy when they get 'friendzoned' and that is annoying and exhausting.
This isn't entirely accurate. You can be a self-proclaimed "decent guy" and actually be a decent guy; it's called having self-esteem and confidence in one's attitude and personality. There are of course men (and women!) who claim to be decent but are otherwise complete morons with poor attitudes.
Original post by Biryani007
The guys that usually come out with this nonsense usually have other things holding them back (issues)...it's easier to label girls as being in the wrong for rejecting these 'nice guys' than to face their issues...everyone likes nice people.
Yes and no. Whilst it's true there are a lot of guys out there who try to justify their poor dating success with the cliche "Girls date jerks" statement, there is some truth behind it and it is clearly evident in today's society. There's also really no solid answer as to why either, as there's a number of reasons.
- Jerks are usually more assertive and confident, traits women tend to love.
- Jerks can be manipulative, which will influence their partner's opinion/interest in them.
- Jerks can be abusive, resulting in their partner sticking around in fear or thinking they deserve no better.
- The women have issues themselves, thinking they can do no matter or lacking the emotional maturity/intellect/willpower to remove themselves from the situation.
And so on and so forth.
Case in point; there's a lot of reasons why this happens, but it does happen and is not just an excuse made by unlucky-in-love men.
Original post by JavaScriptMaster
Obviously cuz nice guys make them feel smothered and it seems like the guy is NOT in control.
Again, not all nice guys are like this. It's an assumption that nice men are boring, insecure, confident, of low self esteem etc. There's plenty of genuinely nice men who are confident, fight for what they believe in, interesting etc.
I think it's an age thing just hang on.
Women like men who are sweet but not a sucker.
Women like men who are sweet but not a sucker.
Well for me...It's because the guy used to be amazing, and that's what made me fall in love with him. Once he realised how much power he had over me, he abused it. Treated me like ****. Once you're in love it's hard to fall out of love. But it's been a few months and enough is enough, girls don't have the capability of constantly excusing a guys behaviour and now I'm well and truly over it.
Yep, OPs post screams self-esteem and confidence.
Of course there are actual decent guys, but most guys that declare themselves one have a hidden agenda of wanting their 'nice guy' schtick to get them whoever they want.
OP is literally admitting that his idea of 'getting along with girls' is wanting them all over him. If he was really a decent guy he'd build an actual relationship with girls on a healthy basis rather than 'acting a certain way' just to get them in his pants because the 'decent guy' act was getting him enough action.
Of course there are actual decent guys, but most guys that declare themselves one have a hidden agenda of wanting their 'nice guy' schtick to get them whoever they want.
Original post by Anonymous
If girls went for decent guys then perhaps people like me wouldn't have to act a certain way to get along with girls.
OP is literally admitting that his idea of 'getting along with girls' is wanting them all over him. If he was really a decent guy he'd build an actual relationship with girls on a healthy basis rather than 'acting a certain way' just to get them in his pants because the 'decent guy' act was getting him enough action.
I don't know why they do, but I agree with everything you've there!
I've experienced that and it's hurtful to me.
One of my previous crushes chose a guy who slaps and hits her over me (it was because I'm too quiet).
So apparently I'm not allowed to be quiet with girls as they will just go and find some abusive ****er instead!
I'm not saying I'm a decent guy btw (last time I said that here I got 5 pages of hate comments so I'm not doing that again, ever!)
I've experienced that and it's hurtful to me.
One of my previous crushes chose a guy who slaps and hits her over me (it was because I'm too quiet).
So apparently I'm not allowed to be quiet with girls as they will just go and find some abusive ****er instead!
I'm not saying I'm a decent guy btw (last time I said that here I got 5 pages of hate comments so I'm not doing that again, ever!)
Original post by Josb
Because most nice guys don't dare to ask them out and many girls can't say no or don't have the balls to leave their *****y boyfriends.
I've asked out girls before (I have little confidence) and been rejected every single time!
I became friends with them all but instead they chose guys who abuse them instead
Original post by wickedisgood
Yep, OPs post screams self-esteem and confidence.
I was replying to a general statement, not the OP's post.
Original post by wickedisgood
Of course there are actual decent guys, but most guys that declare themselves one have a hidden agenda of wanting their 'nice guy' schtick to get them whoever they want.
I have to disagree. Saying that most self-proclaiming decent guys have a hidden agenda just promotes a false, negative image in my opinion. There's enough of the whole "nice guys think being nice will get them laid" mentality on 4chan, Reddit and across the internet in general.
Original post by wickedisgood
OP is literally admitting that his idea of 'getting along with girls' is wanting them all over him. If he was really a decent guy he'd build an actual relationship with girls on a healthy basis rather than 'acting a certain way' just to get them in his pants because the 'decent guy' act was getting him enough action.
I certainly disagree with his methods, and going by your definition above then he certainly fits the bill, I'm just expressing my thoughts in general on the issue in response to the generalized statements made above. OP has it all wrong and it will come back to bite him in the long run.
Though, speaking as someone who attempts to build actual relationships with girls in a healthy manor, I can say that OP has it far easier.
Right, let me teach you a lesson.
>boy acts super nice
>ohmigod, hunky boy hunky personality
>you play hard to get
>boy says all the right things
>boy wins your heart
>boy asks you out
>you accept omg omg
>boy thinks now he has you, can be true self
>true self is not so hunky
>basically puts no effort in you now he he has you
>you feel like what comes out of a dogs bum
>boy acts super nice
>ohmigod, hunky boy hunky personality
>you play hard to get
>boy says all the right things
>boy wins your heart
>boy asks you out
>you accept omg omg
>boy thinks now he has you, can be true self
>true self is not so hunky
>basically puts no effort in you now he he has you
>you feel like what comes out of a dogs bum
Original post by FireFreezer77
I've asked out girls before (I have little confidence) and been rejected every single time!
I became friends with them all but instead they chose guys who abuse them instead
I became friends with them all but instead they chose guys who abuse them instead
That is so awful to hear, hopefully you'll find a decent girl one day.
And trust me, the guys were nothing like how they are with them now, and it's not so easy to leave an abusive relationship believe it or not.
(edited 7 years ago)
A lot of those guys are attractive sadly.
Tfw forever alone. In my experience - which has often been unfortunate - I find that I do in fact naturally gravitate towards guys that appear to be good and wholesome - however they're usually manipulative and end up messing me around. I'd kill for a guy like me - slightly shy, quiet, miserable and most of all a fondness for anal beads.
Original post by thecatwithnohat
That is so awful to hear, hopefully you'll find a decent girl one day.
And trust me, the guys were nothing like how they are with them now, and it's not so easy to leave an abusive relationship believe it or not.
And trust me, the guys were nothing like how they are with them now, and it's not so easy to leave an abusive relationship believe it or not.
It's not great to experience. Thanks! I sure hope so tbh!
I guess they weren't. Like you wouldn't choose to go out with a guy who hits you! That would be obsurd if they did!
Yeah I understand that. They're more likely to be abused more if they try to leave.
I hope you've not had to experience this?
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