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Will starting uni help me get over my ex

I'm 21 and I'm starting uni this September, I've had to do open uni part time for the past two years due to personal problems, so haven't got a social life at all really, I haven't had one since I was 16. Anyway my ex boyfriend, who was my first everything, broke up with me about two months ago and I'm struggling so much to get over it - the lack of social life doesn't exactly help. I'm starting uni in September and it's going to be such a huge change for me, going out every day, being around people etc, do you guys think it will help me with moving on from the relationship? I'm feeling hopeless right now and like I'll never get over him

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Yes it will help you dramatically!

A social life, let alone an awesome one, will help you about 50% to move on. The other 50% will depend on time and wether u contact your ex or not.

But make a pledge that u will never contact him after sept.

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There will be times where you are distracted. But in the first few weeks, there might be times of loneliness.

It will be okay and as time goes on you'll heal
Reply 3
Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
I can't think of anything much better to get over a breakup to be honest. A new environment, new interesting study, new friends and seething with love interest.
thank you guys, your replies are giving me hope :h:
Reply 5
Avatar for eden3
eden3
19
It depends on your personality. If you're a sociable, likeable person... you'll be fine :smile:


Personally uni intensified my loneliness and sent me into depression.
Original post by eden3
It depends on your personality. If you're a sociable, likeable person... you'll be fine :smile:


Personally uni intensified my loneliness and sent me into depression.


:erm:
Reply 7
Avatar for eden3
eden3
19
Original post by philosophoraptor
:erm:


Don't let my experience put you off. The majority of people have the time of their life at uni. I'm just a loser who gets overly nervous talking to people (probably due to how I was treated in school lol) so my first year was pretty ****. I'm an anomaly.


As for getting over your ex, I'm not in a position to answer that. I've never been in a relationship and never will.
Original post by eden3
Don't let my experience put you off. The majority of people have the time of their life at uni. I'm just a loser who gets overly nervous talking to people (probably due to how I was treated in school lol) so my first year was pretty ****. I'm an anomaly.


As for getting over your ex, I'm not in a position to answer that. I've never been in a relationship and never will.


You have q very sad life

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Reply 9
Avatar for eden3
eden3
19
Original post by nerdling_CompSci
You have q very sad life

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Yes and I've tried to end it before, thank you for reminding me.
Original post by philosophoraptor
I'm 21 and I'm starting uni this September, I've had to do open uni part time for the past two years due to personal problems, so haven't got a social life at all really, I haven't had one since I was 16. Anyway my ex boyfriend, who was my first everything, broke up with me about two months ago and I'm struggling so much to get over it - the lack of social life doesn't exactly help. I'm starting uni in September and it's going to be such a huge change for me, going out every day, being around people etc, do you guys think it will help me with moving on from the relationship? I'm feeling hopeless right now and like I'll never get over him


Well let's put it this way; assuming that's you in the photo, you're gorgeous and I'm sure people will want to be around you, so don't worry too much about your social life because I absolutely guarantee it'll pick up in no time!

As for your ex; sorry to hear that this has happened to you. I got broken up with just before uni myself and like you didn't have much of a social life, so whilst it was hell for the first few months the good news is that it gets better...a hell of a lot better, in fact. The other good news is that uni will definitely help you to get over him; you're going to be so busy making new friends, getting settled, exploring new opportunities etc. For me I just focused on myself and did anything and everything that took my interest, and now I'm a far better person than I was. Just take things as they come, do things you want to do and find your happiness again!

One thing I will encourage is to look on Facebook for fresher's groups for your uni. I joined about two and had about 70 friends before I'd even started the semester! At least twenty of them turned out to be really good friends who I still speak to regularly!

Since I can relate to this so much, I invite you to drop me a PM and we can have a chat if you're looking for someone to talk to. :smile: Otherwise, good luck!!
Time.
You also need the correct attitude/ mindset or it will take much longer.
Become involved, nobody knows you and you cna make new friends. Work out whether you wnat a new bf or just friends.
Its a long relationship to get over so dont rush yourself.

Average number of partners for a woman is 8, so you still have some to go.

I do suggest cutting all contact and all social media with your ex, it will only make you sad. Dont stalk them, but focus on your own life and making it great. Contacting him will put you back to the beginning.

You also need to learn hpw to read people, especually boys and you dont have much experience of that.
Original post by eden3
Yes and I've tried to end it before, thank you for reminding me.


Don't feel like that.
:console:
Again, thank you guys. He has given me the whole 'I want to be friends' speech, but I am keeping my distance. I feel like I'm coping... but at any second could just be triggered by something and completely set myself back with the healing process, if you know what I mean?

Just want it to be September now, so that I'm too busy socialising, doing work, and making a new life for myself that I won't even have time to think about him.

:u:
Original post by philosophoraptor
Again, thank you guys. He has given me the whole 'I want to be friends' speech, but I am keeping my distance. I feel like I'm coping... but at any second could just be triggered by something and completely set myself back with the healing process, if you know what I mean?

Just want it to be September now, so that I'm too busy socialising, doing work, and making a new life for myself that I won't even have time to think about him.

:u:


Don't ever, ever give in to the 'I want to be friends' - speech. You're best leaving it all in the past.

Also, whether the first few weeks don't go well, or even if they do, there may be a short period of time where you just want to give up uni and go back home etc. It doesn't happen to everyone but it can happen, and in that time you'll probably wish that you were back with him if you haven't really met anyone up to that point. And that happens, don't give up either, and don't contact him.
Original post by philosophoraptor
Again, thank you guys. He has given me the whole 'I want to be friends' speech, but I am keeping my distance. I feel like I'm coping... but at any second could just be triggered by something and completely set myself back with the healing process, if you know what I mean?

Just want it to be September now, so that I'm too busy socialising, doing work, and making a new life for myself that I won't even have time to think about him.

:u:


What about getting a temporary job until September that will keep you busy so you won't be thinking of him, make extra cash and you will meet new people.
Original post by chikane
What about getting a temporary job until September that will keep you busy so you won't be thinking of him, make extra cash and you will meet new people.


This is actually a really good idea; I'll start looking into it.
:crossedf:
Original post by SeanFM
Don't ever, ever give in to the 'I want to be friends' - speech. You're best leaving it all in the past.

Also, whether the first few weeks don't go well, or even if they do, there may be a short period of time where you just want to give up uni and go back home etc. It doesn't happen to everyone but it can happen, and in that time you'll probably wish that you were back with him if you haven't really met anyone up to that point. And that happens, don't give up either, and don't contact him.


off topic but why do people who break up with you even bother to claim to want to be friends? it doesn't even make sense :/
Original post by tootles44
off topic but why do people who break up with you even bother to claim to want to be friends? it doesn't even make sense :/


Maybe they genuinely felt something or weren't ready to let go completely. Or that they want to keep a backup in case they change their mind. :dontknow:
Original post by SeanFM
Maybe they genuinely felt something or weren't ready to let go completely. Or that they want to keep a backup in case they change their mind. :dontknow:


Don't think i would want to be just friends with an ex i would think it would be hard going from a relationship to being mates.

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