Do you think it is possible that...

someone could only want you when you don't want them? And that as soon as you start to show them your love and affection they go off you and start to look elsewhere?

I feel that I'm in this position.

I think it is possible. If you've ever heard of 'thrill of the chase', then that's.. similar, I guess. Or that someone wants you, not when you're interested in them but when you're actually with someone else. Human nature is very strange.

There is such a thing as coming on too strongly though - but I may just be interpreting 'love and affection' in a slightly different way to how you mean.

And I guess, yeah.. if you know 100% that someone likes you, then.. I dunno, things might go down differently for the other person versus if they didn't know they felt.

That's what you have to do if you like them, I guess. Good luck

Why don't you just ask her how she feels?

That's me 100% of the time. Classic glutton for punishment ...

ha, yeah, it's kind of painful though, like someone ripping your arm off haha

Plenty of people only want something when it is foreign, exciting and doesn't appear to be an option for them. Most people then lose the taste when they realise it's essentially the same ****.

You don't realize what your doing at the time?

yeah that's so true, but on the contrary, i have a lot of (girl) friends who are very good at hooking guys and keeping them with them for years on end. These guys are lovely with them. With me it's all like, I'm told I'm gorgeous and clever and marvellous and all sorts of other nonsense by a guy, but then as soon as I let my guard down and give them the attention they've given me, and probably a lot more on top, i get ditched by them. it's getting really draining and makes me feel really unwanted and worthless. it's really hard every time, because I've put a lot of emotional effort into these guys. it just keeps on happening and I don't think I can take much more. I simply can't help myself from giving a lot to someone if I like them. I don't know how to stop myself. It feels unachievable.

I guess not, no. At the time I'm just thinking 'this feels right' ... then the same crap happens

Sorry to be harsh, but ultimately this is your issue, not theirs.

I suggest you learn to manage your expectations and be reasonable when it comes to dating. Unfortunately a lot of dating mishaps and angst simply boil down to two people looking for/expecting different things.

I suggest you try to build up a list of red flags and use these as your criteria for future dating. It's a rough way to find out what you want, but ultimately getting rejected will point you there.

oh..I thought you were the one who doesn't want them till their gone.