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I can't be friends with people with mental issues?

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Original post by Airmed
Like Tiger Rag said, you're choosing the wrong people. Not everyone with MH issues is attention seeking.


Thanks, I don't think most of them were attention seeking though (apart from the hipster girl I know). My ex didn't even tell me, his dad did. And the problems with my uni friends were because they were rude and passive aggressive, not really demanding attention. :smile:
Original post by Millieconfused

Warwick, he was on the graduate course so a bit older than me. He had a lot of "acquaintances" because he was good at theatre, but not many really close friends. His close friends were negative, I didn't like them. I met his family a few times and they were really proud of being non conformist if you know what I mean, his mum was a professor and really arrogant too and his dad was an artist.


ahh okay not the same guy, i didn't know him well enough to comment on his mental health. That sounds really difficult to deal with, no wonder it didnt got the distance :s-smilie:
Reply 22
Original post by Millieconfused
Thanks, I don't think most of them were attention seeking though (apart from the hipster girl I know). My ex didn't even tell me, his dad did. And the problems with my uni friends were because they were rude and passive aggressive, not really demanding attention. :smile:


As someone with a few personality disorders I don't like it when people romanticised MH or use it as an excuse to get away with things.
Original post by Airmed
As someone with a few personality disorders I don't like it when people romanticised MH or use it as an excuse to get away with things.


I agree it makes everyone think people's saying it for attention. The girl I know claims to be "emo" too though she's 26, I'm not sure if it's normal in that subculture but it's not good to romanticise as you say :lolwut:
Original post by abcde3237
ahh okay not the same guy, i didn't know him well enough to comment on his mental health. That sounds really difficult to deal with, no wonder it didnt got the distance :s-smilie:


Yeah, I dumped him but nicely, and when I saw his friends around (though I didn't know them well) and they asked why I told them just a few of the things he did. I wasn't exaggerating and olny mentioned a bit TBH. But I saw him ranting angrily on FB that evening about "people who tell lies, everyone needs to deal with them" and "I'll try to be mad for a while" so I blocked him. :lolwut:
I don't think it's wrong to feel that way.*

People who have a mental illness can be difficult to deal with and sometimes their negativity can rub off on you.

I used to be friends with a guy who had depression and who didn't care for a lot of things. I didn't fully understand depression at that point but the way he didn't care about me or most people did hurt and I find it hard to deal with people who are constantly on a downer.

It is understandable the way you are feeling especially if you've had bad experiences of it before.*
Original post by Millieconfused
Yeah, I dumped him but nicely, and when I saw his friends around (though I didn't know them well) and they asked why I told them just a few of the things he did. I wasn't exaggerating and olny mentioned a bit TBH. But I saw him ranting angrily on FB that evening about "people who tell lies, everyone needs to deal with them" and "I'll try to be mad for a while" so I blocked him. :lolwut:


how odd! :/ although given how you've described his parents I'm not surprised he's a little on the unstable side!

I wonder how he got into medical school though, imagine what he'll be like with patients...
Original post by Millieconfused
Good post :smile:although I think some people say they are suicidal as a cry for help, its not just attention seeking :dontknow:

Also I know the NHS is **** at treating MH problems. My ex's dad actually told me he went to see the doctor about it and got talking therapy. But (maybe because he was in medical school himself) he didn't go for long


I know not everyone is attention seeking, but there are a lot of people who I came across who unfortunately are.That is also true, and therapy is only successful at treating such disorders if the therapist is good. A bad therapist will not be able to help with anything.
Original post by DanielleT192
I don't think it's wrong to feel that way.*

People who have a mental illness can be difficult to deal with and sometimes their negativity can rub off on you.

I used to be friends with a guy who had depression and who didn't care for a lot of things. I didn't fully understand depression at that point but the way he didn't care about me or most people did hurt and I find it hard to deal with people who are constantly on a downer.

It is understandable the way you are feeling especially if you've had bad experiences of it before.*


Yeah, I find it hard to deal with negative people who don't have MH problems also. Some people with depression do care but I can see how the illness leads to others not caring

abcde3237
how odd! :/ although given how you've described his parents I'm not surprised he's a little on the unstable side!

I wonder how he got into medical school though, imagine what he'll be like with patients...


Because they're non conformist? :tongue: Yeah, the first time I met the family it was on a day out around London and we went round all the museums and his artist dad was just criticising everything, sometimes loudly in front of the staff. :nope:

His mum is a biology professor at RHUL. Apparently she sorted him loads of work experience because she knows people in medicine. He was good academically, just rude. He could also be nasty in private but change next to friends :rolleyes:
Original post by Anonymous
I know not everyone is attention seeking, but there are a lot of people who I came across who unfortunately are.That is also true, and therapy is only successful at treating such disorders if the therapist is good. A bad therapist will not be able to help with anything.


What's a "good" therapist?

From what Ive heard the NHS is generally bad at treating MH problems (including therapists unfortunately). Especially now we have budget cuts :frown:
Glad to hear :yep: Do you mind if I ask what she did? I might point my hipster friend in that direction. I think she's tried most pills though.

How does he sound like someone you know? :smile:
Thanks. I do let her vent to me even though we're not really close but then she seems happy and boasting a lot of the time too and won't even talk about it. She parties more than me TBH :dontknow: If not I might distance myself as it's really up and down. All her best friends have MH problems too, maybe they can help her better.

My ex was well off too as well as coming from an artsy eccentric family. Everyone has short temper sometimes, but with him it was part of his personality so I had to break up TBH. Hope your friend is just stressed over exams.
not really
i have a friend who's autistic but it doesn't really make a difference tbh
Original post by animeamanda1412
not really
i have a friend who's autistic but it doesn't really make a difference tbh


not really what? :colondollar:
Original post by animeamanda1412
not really
i have a friend who's autistic but it doesn't really make a difference tbh


Autism isn't a mental health problem.

I've got friends and relatives with mental health problems. I remember one relative mentioning on Facebook that she has Bi Polar and she managed to lose "friends" over it. But she never did anything wrong. How lovely. :frown:
Original post by Tiger Rag
Autism isn't a mental health problem.

I've got friends and relatives with mental health problems. I remember one relative mentioning on Facebook that she has Bi Polar and she managed to lose "friends" over it. But she never did anything wrong. How lovely. :frown:


That's not good :s-smilie:
There are many different manifestations of mental health problems. People with PD are going to be challenging as that's the nature of it - it is very hard to maintain friendships with people who have these types of issues. It doesn't make you a bad person or discriminatory to find it hard.*
Everyone has some type of disorder. Have a deep conversation with anyone for a while and you will uncover it. Whether they are suicidal, self-harm, suffered abuse as a child, in severe debt or whatever.
I am not sure what the issue is. Do you make it a challenge for yourself to be successful at dating someone with MH? If so, that sounds like a sick thing to do.
At the end of the day, you need to find someone who suits you. In a way we all have some kind of personality disorder (or quirkiness :smile: I like to call it). My partner is very clingy and needy but I have learnt to deal with it. If I had a different personality I might not be able to cope with it. So just look at the feeling that being with that person creates in you, and if you don't like it then get out of the relationship. Many people with no MH are also very difficult to be with.
Reply 39
Honestly, to me it sounds like these people were just *******s/idiots regardless of their mental health. You'd probably be able to get along fine with a lot of people with mental health issues.

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