Living life on the edge: Me and my crazy life

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1UMiQZ122VA

The final post!
Its a bit different to the rest!
Please let me know if it doesnt work!
Any comments or questions, drop a VM

Thanks for the support guys!!

really good post!! so inspiring and motivational, i definitely learnt a few things!
i really like your nice voice btw!!

Only saw the tag now

A really inspiring message FireFreezer! Amazing to hear about your journey

Okay so I just finished listening to your voice message and may I say first, your voice is so beautiful lol. You sound like a sophisticated, bright, young guy! Secondly, I am so happy that tsr has helped you is such a positive way. It sounds like it has made a huge impact in your life, and I'm happy that you're able to share that with us. Finally, it's sad to see your journey come to an "almost" end so early! We all hope you can continue your blog and share more wonderful experiences that you have gone through, or things in general, that you could share to help someone who is going through it also.

Keep blogging. Expressing your thoughts and feelings is a good way to remain content and happy. People are out there reading every word you write, blogging is a powerful tool to help create a change- so don't stop

I think I've rambled on a fair bit lol and I was going to record a VM but unfortunately, it doesn't allow me to do so on my phone!

Aw thankyou!
Im glad you found it inspiring and motivational!!! Makes me very happy!
Aw thankyou! Im sure yours is even nicer though!!

Aww...that's sweet...I'm glad tsr has made such a huge difference to u..👍

no problem! aw, it is great that you are feeling happy!
aha, perhaps. nah, tbh it sounds awful, rather posh and terribly squeaky sometimes. 😂


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It's a momentous occasion for me! Very rare!
No! I'm sure you have a beautiful voice!!
You up for a chat again soon? You disappeared after my last message

i hope that you don't mind me posting here. i will try and make this as short as possible, but i am afraid that it had to be said.

i believe that there is a major thing which contributes to being able to partially 'escape' the toll of a mental health condition(s). Being supported by your parents/close family is (in my opinion) an essential way to help improve.

as some of you may know, i also suffer from mental health conditions. i have anxiety, minor depression & minor OCD, so, i completely understand that different people may hold a wide range of personal views on what i am about to expand on. please don't 'hate' on me or anything, this is a big thing for me to post.

like i was saying, i have suffered with those issues for about two years now. it wasn't until i moved to my highly pressurised school and really began my GCSE years that everything kicked off. i have had a rather unstable and unfortunate childhood, which i won't share in this post. if you want to know about it, feel free to private message me. for me, it would be a lot better if the whole wide world didn't have access to my life story. hence why i won't explain here.

neither of my parents really understand what i am going through, creating huge tensions. before i go any further, just wanted to say that my parents are divorced. so, they don't really discuss my mental health with one another. i love my parents very much, they do many positive things for me and help me out a lot. what i have outlined below is how the minority of their actions have affected my mental health, of course i appreciate all of the positive things that have been done for me.

unfortunately, my mum just does not understand the severity and impact of mental health and what i am dealing with. she just says that i am being 'selfish' and that i should just 'get on with things.' wanting to talk about my issues with my mum is apparently uncalled for. on the outset, the way that i react in certain events (due to my mental health issues) may be considered as 'selfish' to the average person. however, if one delves deeper into why i am acting like i am, they will understand that there is a whole lot more to the story. in my opinion, my mum shouldn't be judging me from the outset, she should be looking underneath. apparently i always believe that 'i am right,' which may appear so, but, if i don't do things a certain way then that really irritates me. effectively, i have my own 'rituals.'

my dad, however, also suffers from the same mental health conditions as me. so, he obviously understands the severity, unlike my mother. yet, he considers my issues to be inferior to his, apparently i am an 'attention seeking teenager' and my problems do not matter, nor do they mean anything. i find this rather hilarious, is my dad implying that as soon as i hit 16, my problems will suddenly hold some weight? according to my dad 'i know nothing in this world' and should just 'get on with things' rather than ask for help. okay dad...

so yes, i have briefly outlined how my parents 'attempt' to avoid coming to terms with the fact that i have serious issues. even though i have been diagnosed with all of them, they still can't face the facts. resulting in me having no support from my parents. honestly, i feel like nobody in this world 'gets me,' understands my problems or even realises WHY i must do things in a certain way. i had to go and get diagnosed by myself and sign up with the school counsellor.

however, i am effectively lying to my counsellor. i tell her that everything is 'okay,' i am 'getting better.' when really i have just been trying to ignore my issues in the last couple of months, putting a rug over them. i didn't confront them, which has now resulted in these feelings growing even more. i don't really feel comfortable telling my counsellor how i really feel, i am worried that she will go and tell every single staff member at my school.

one last thing to touch on, inside of me, it is almost like i am much older than 15. i feel very mature for my age, many people have also confirmed that idea. both my parents treat me like a 'child,' almost trapping my true self. they are ignoring the fact that i have matured rather early, an 'old head on young shoulders' as my counsellor would say. as you can imagine, being treated like a child when you feel and act like an adult is very frustrating, again, causing further tensions between my parents and i...
honestly, i feel 'crazy,' abnormal even, i am different, unlike others.

but, to conclude, i guess my parents are in denial about my mental health because they love me and don't want to see me distraught. this doesn't help my recovery at all though. so, i believe that support is a great way for somebody to believe that they are worth it, and that mental health can effectively be defeated. even though the problems will still be there, with the right support, they can be minimised.


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x

Ill tag y'all as this post is relevant and id like to you all to read it!
@?Hannah thanks for sharing!

@Platopus
Would you like to know what you're getting yourself into!?

That sounds worrying... What am I getting myself in to?