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She talks about wanting a relationship but not with me

We're kind of close friends, been talking for 4 months, text every day although we haven't met yet. She says she wants to meet but keeps putting it off. She's shy and has low self esteem and has never had a relationship (neither have I).

I've asked her if she wants to try a relationship a few times and she said no. Sometimes she tells me how she wishes she had a boyfriend, but whenever I hint at it she just ignores it.

??????
Original post by Anonymous
We're kind of close friends, been talking for 4 months, text every day although we haven't met yet. She says she wants to meet but keeps putting it off. She's shy and has low self esteem and has never had a relationship (neither have I).

I've asked her if she wants to try a relationship a few times and she said no. Sometimes she tells me how she wishes she had a boyfriend, but whenever I hint at it she just ignores it.

??????


Meet up before thinking or talking about a relationship. Too late now, but try to meet up if you can.

If you haven't ever skyped them or anything similar then be wary of catfishes.

If they really don't want to/can't meet you then maybe it is worth giving up, sadly.
Original post by Anonymous
We're kind of close friends, been talking for 4 months, text every day although we haven't met yet. She says she wants to meet but keeps putting it off. She's shy and has low self esteem and has never had a relationship (neither have I).

I've asked her if she wants to try a relationship a few times and she said no. Sometimes she tells me how she wishes she had a boyfriend, but whenever I hint at it she just ignores it.

??????


what? why on earth do you want to try a relationship when you haven't met?
Have you ever skyped or facetimed with this person? I don't know why I'm sensing catfish.
Reply 4
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by 133221333123111
Meet up before thinking or talking about a relationship. Too late now, but try to meet up if you can.If you haven't ever skyped them or anything similar then be wary of catfishes.If they really don't want to/can't meet you then maybe it is worth giving up, sadly.




Definitely not a catfish. I think she's just shy but it confuses me. Tbh though I'm kind of sick of putting in everything and just not getting it reciprocated. You're probably right.
Reply 5
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-Miracle
9
Original post by Anonymous
Definitely not a catfish. I think she's just shy but it confuses me. Tbh though I'm kind of sick of putting in everything and just not getting it reciprocated. You're probably right.


Unless you meet in person or skype, there's nothing to prove it isn't a catfish, not saying that it is one necessarily but your situation does raise eyebrows.
Reply 6
Avatar for Anonymous #1
Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by -Miracle
Unless you meet in person or skype, there's nothing to prove it isn't a catfish, not saying that it is one necessarily but your situation does raise eyebrows.


Well she did send a picture of herself with the time and date on to prove she's not :rofl: she suggested skyping a while ago but I was hesitant and now she doesn't want to, same with meeting up smh
Original post by Anonymous
Well she did send a picture of herself with the time and date on to prove she's not :rofl: she suggested skyping a while ago but I was hesitant and now she doesn't want to, same with meeting up smh


Stop pursuing her, she isn't interested and nothing you do will change her mind. You're only going to get your feelings hurt. Distance yourself before you're in too deep.
Reply 8
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by Anonymous
Stop pursuing her, she isn't interested and nothing you do will change her mind. You're only going to get your feelings hurt. Distance yourself before you're in too deep.


I know you're right but it's not that easy. She doesn't have many other friends, I can't just stop talking to her. Not that I even want to, but I know it's best for my own mental health.
Original post by Anonymous
Well she did send a picture of herself with the time and date on to prove she's not :rofl: she suggested skyping a while ago but I was hesitant and now she doesn't want to, same with meeting up smh


Anyone can put a time and date over a picture lmao. What else do you know that makes it certain she isn't a catfish?
I was a catfish for years and I know all the tricks, so tell us more.. It will be obvious to me if she's real or not.
Original post by Anonymous
Anyone can put a time and date over a picture lmao. What else do you know that makes it certain she isn't a catfish?
I was a catfish for years and I know all the tricks, so tell us more.. It will be obvious to me if she's real or not.


No I mean she'd actually written the time and date on paper and showed it. I'm like 99% sure she's not but what would help you determine whether she is?
Original post by Anonymous
No I mean she'd actually written the time and date on paper and showed it. I'm like 99% sure she's not but what would help you determine whether she is?


So a proof picture? Did you ask her to do that? Did she send it straight away or delay it? Those are easy to fake in Photoshop.
Also, do you have her on social networking websites, like FB or anything where you can see the people she knows irl?
Original post by Anonymous
So a proof picture? Did you ask her to do that? Did she send it straight away or delay it? Those are easy to fake in Photoshop.
Also, do you have her on social networking websites, like FB or anything where you can see the people she knows irl?


I did ask her to send it but she did it straight away.

I don't, she doesn't have FB and doesn't like to give out her Twitter. Most of this is because she had a bad experience with someone she met online.
Original post by Anonymous
I did ask her to send it but she did it straight away.

I don't, she doesn't have FB and doesn't like to give out her Twitter. Most of this is because she had a bad experience with someone she met online.


If you've been friends for 4 months then there's no reason for her not to have you on twitter.
When I was a catfished I only used twitter because FB etc was too much effort to fake.

Does she have insta or snapchat?

It rings alarms that you haven't got her on any social media where you can see the friends she has in real life.
Original post by Anonymous
We're kind of close friends, been talking for 4 months, text every day although we haven't met yet. She says she wants to meet but keeps putting it off. She's shy and has low self esteem and has never had a relationship (neither have I).

I've asked her if she wants to try a relationship a few times and she said no. Sometimes she tells me how she wishes she had a boyfriend, but whenever I hint at it she just ignores it.

??????


Maybe you should meet , her and try and have a serious convorsation with her , as I am in the same position as you right now and it's very complicated , but also annoying at the same time and you cannot figure out what they want and at start they are interested in you . I would say try and meet up and talk or just try and keep a distance, because you could get hurt and I know how it feels to get hurt its not a nice feeling , so to try and prevent that😉
Honestly just tell her to go to hell or something and move on cuz that prospect is dead you need to move on to the next person. Ghost her.
Alternatively it could be a neck beard 40 stone fat****er catfish lol. I have my suspicions sometimes you know......

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