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Reply 20
As an ex muslim, leaving Islam was and probably will be the best decision I ever made. Religion has no place in the civilised world and once you free yourself from it's clutches, it'll be like a huge burden has been lifted from your shoulders.
Before making a final decision read an English translated Qur'an (whether you're Muslim or not it's a good point to start so you somewhat understand what you're discussing) and then you can decide whether you believe it or not.Secondly make important distinctions between culture and religion. For example, a lot of Muslims celebrate random things and behave in certain ways that cannot be justified but 'Islamic texts' per say.Have a debate with someone - maybe a cousin you are close with - if you can trust them tell them openly about how you feel hopefully they can help you out.Finally, read loads of books about atheism and Islam in different perspectives - eg, from a Muslim point of view and Atheist point of view.Feel free to message me for any advice.Also, praying to Jesus Christ isn't going to achieve anything so I would recommend abstaining from that. Lol.
Original post by sulaimanali
Islam isn't sexist to women..do more research. There's a reason for everything...do you know why (those things u listed above) are the way they are?


Just because some fictional god says that it is right does not make it sexist.

"women should not drive because seat belts damage the womb and ovaries"
That is sexist and totally false
Original post by Anonymous
I was born and raised Muslim. The faith has a lot of good things about it.

However recently, I am starting to have doubts. I'm not as religious as I used to be. Particularly being a female, I find some parts of Islam extremely sexist.

For example women have to cover up, men can take up to 4 wives, Muslim women must only marry Muslim men, underage girls are allowed to marry as soon as start puberty ,women aren't allowed to leave the house without a male relative, women will make up the majority in hellfire because they are ungrateful to their husbands , sex slaves are permissible during war, woman's testimony often counts half of a man's testimony, women inheritance half that of a man, a woman must always obey her husband etc.

But I've read up on all the above and I do appreciate some of them give good reasons as to why. But one thing I can't get over is the fact our prophet Muhammed (pbuh) married Aisha (r.a) when she was only 6 years old. The reason I've heard include those were the times it happened a lot then, She contributed to the spread of Muhammad's(pbuh) message and served the Muslim community for 44 years after his death, the marriage not being consummated until she had reached puberty at the age of nine or ten years old etc. It's really hard for me to overlook.

But seriously if some joe public did that everyone would find it disgusting. What makes it a problem for me is that men are meant to follow the sunnah of the prophet. This means it's ok for Muslim men to take underage bride. It happens a lot in Afghanistan, Pakistan etc.

I'm just starting to lose my faith a little and it is mostly to do with its attitude towards women.


Read the Christian Bible and do some research into the roman empire, you'll learn that a lot of religions are false and was created to subdue slaves. Do your own homework as this can be told to someone, its something you need to see for yourself.
Reply 24
Salam
Feel free to PM me and I can try and help as a fellow Muslim sister :smile:

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Original post by Anonymous
I was born and raised Muslim. The faith has a lot of good things about it.

However recently, I am starting to have doubts. I'm not as religious as I used to be. Particularly being a female, I find some parts of Islam extremely sexist.

For example women have to cover up, men can take up to 4 wives, Muslim women must only marry Muslim men, underage girls are allowed to marry as soon as start puberty ,women aren't allowed to leave the house without a male relative, women will make up the majority in hellfire because they are ungrateful to their husbands , sex slaves are permissible during war, woman's testimony often counts half of a man's testimony, women inheritance half that of a man, a woman must always obey her husband etc.

But I've read up on all the above and I do appreciate some of them give good reasons as to why. But one thing I can't get over is the fact our prophet Muhammed (pbuh) married Aisha (r.a) when she was only 6 years old. The reason I've heard include those were the times it happened a lot then, She contributed to the spread of Muhammad's(pbuh) message and served the Muslim community for 44 years after his death, the marriage not being consummated until she had reached puberty at the age of nine or ten years old etc. It's really hard for me to overlook.

But seriously if some joe public did that everyone would find it disgusting. What makes it a problem for me is that men are meant to follow the sunnah of the prophet. This means it's ok for Muslim men to take underage bride. It happens a lot in Afghanistan, Pakistan etc.

I'm just starting to lose my faith a little and it is mostly to do with its attitude towards women.



Can I just give you one piece of advice?

DO NOT ACCEPT THOSE WHO TELL YOU THAT IT'S THE DEVIL PLAYING WITH YOUR MIND!

I've always had doubts, when I was young, 10 or 11, my family used to tell me not to think about it because it's "the devil". Think about it, isn't this the perfect way to control one's mind?
Imagine every time you criticised the government, people called you a "spy" or something awful like that. Wouldn't that be the best way to control the people like sheep?

DO NOT be a sheep, question everything! I am sure you're intelligent enough to know that.
Original post by DorianGrayism
Love how you ignore what she has written about underage sex, child marriage, number of wives and etc

I think most guys here have managed to work out everything you are talking about without converting to Islam.

What you have written is so ridiculous that you made yourself anonymous.


I ignored it because she's ignorant and one sided. What of child marriage? She says women are to be married off as soon as they reach puberty age 9/10 the same applies for men. The hadiths say that boys should be married off aged 15 when they're generally considered to have reached puberty. Secondly, how many British muslims do you know that have married 9 year olds?? Its not ridiculous. its truthful and logical which is why you have no counter arguments of your own. Child marriages are tiny minority of all Muslim marriages and is often practiced in certain African and middle eastern countries.
Original post by Anonymous
I ignored it because she's ignorant and one sided. What of child marriage? She says women are to be married off as soon as they reach puberty age 9/10 the same applies for men. The hadiths say that boys should be married off aged 15 when they're generally considered to have reached puberty. Secondly, how many British muslims do you know that have married 9 year olds?? Its not ridiculous. its truthful and logical which is why you have no counter arguments of your own. Child marriages are tiny minority of all Muslim marriages and is often practiced in certain African and middle eastern countries.


So...let's clarify...you are saying it is acceptable for a Muslim girl to married as a 9 year old?
Original post by sulaimanali
Islam isn't sexist to women..do more research. There's a reason for everything...do you know why (those things u listed above) are the way they are?


Islam isn't sexist?
Okay, let me prove you wrong.

Oxford dictionary definition of sexism: "Prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination, typically against women, on the basis of sex."

Here's a quote by Muhammed:
Once Allah's Apostle went out to the Musalla (to offer the prayer) o 'Id-al-Adha or Al-Fitr prayer. Then he passed by the women and said, "O women! Give alms, as I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-fire were you (women)." They asked, "Why is it so, O Allah's Apostle ?" He replied, "You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands. I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. A cautious sensible man could be led astray by some of you." The women asked, "O Allah's Apostle! What is deficient in our intelligence and religion?" He said, "Is not the evidence of two women equal to the witness of one man?" They replied in the affirmative. He said, "This is the deficiency in her intelligence. Isn't it true that a woman can neither pray nor fast during her menses?" The women replied in the affirmative. He said, "This is the deficiency in her religion."

Sahih Bukhari, 1:6:301

If that's not sexist, then nothing is.
Original post by DorianGrayism
So...let's clarify...you are saying it is acceptable for a Muslim girl to married as a 9 year old?


Not at all and neither do the vast majority of muslims. These type of marriages take place in a small minority of poor countries amongst a minority of uneducated people. You're not very bright are you? I'm simply debunking her claim that Islam is somehow oppressive towards her or women in general. Quite clearly it isn't if the same rules apply to men as well.
Ex Muslim here.

If you have any questions or any advice my DM's are always open.

Good luck, I know how confusing/scary and just impossible it may seem to leave Islam.
Hello. My advice would be to take your time with things. Research and read into other religions. Sikhism, Hinduism, Judaism, Buddhism, Christianity, etc. Speak to members of those religions on TSR and find out what they are about. I keep hearing about a lot of ex Muslims converting to Judaism. Read the Ex Muslim Society on TSR. It might be that you come to a decision that there is no God. Or you might come to a decision that there is, but a different religion is the way forward for you. Or thirdly you might find that Islam is indeed the religion for you after all. See it all as a journey of self discovery. This can only be a positive thing for you, wherever it leads you. Good luck.
Original post by Anonymous
Not at all and neither do the vast majority of muslims. These type of marriages take place in a small minority of poor countries amongst a minority of uneducated people. You're not very bright are you? I'm simply debunking her claim that Islam is somehow oppressive towards her or women in general. Quite clearly it isn't if the same rules apply to men as well.


No. You were deliberately avoiding the issue.

You didn't talk about when girls should be married. Just boys which was 15.

So, back to the question, if a 9 year old girl has hit puberty, then is it ok for them to be married? If not, then what criteria do you use?
Just one more piece of advice. I would really seriously not go and seek advice with an Imam, [Is that what they are called?] They will not have your vested interests at heart. They will have the vested interests in reinforcing their faith. I would give the same advice to anyone wanting to leave ANY religion. You will not get a sound, rational debate from them. It will all be skewed towards their own self interest, i.e. their specific religion.
Islam is more about justice. As a woman I can't be ignorant and say we should be absolutely equal to men, and vice versa. If I do then I expect no gender segregation at all, not even the toilets. Also with clothing.
Why is everyone typing in bold? Is it a form of yelling?
Original post by Anonymous
Not at all and neither do the vast majority of muslims. These type of marriages take place in a small minority of poor countries amongst a minority of uneducated people. You're not very bright are you? I'm simply debunking her claim that Islam is somehow oppressive towards her or women in general. Quite clearly it isn't if the same rules apply to men as well.


No. You were deliberately avoiding the issue.

You didn't talk about when girls should be married. Just boys which was 15.

So, back to the question, if a 9 year old girl has hit puberty, then is it ok for them to be married? If not, then what criteria do you use?
Original post by oShahpo
Can I just give you one piece of advice?

DO NOT ACCEPT THOSE WHO TELL YOU THAT IT'S THE DEVIL PLAYING WITH YOUR MIND!

I've always had doubts, when I was young, 10 or 11, my family used to tell me not to think about it because it's "the devil". Think about it, isn't this the perfect way to control one's mind?
Imagine every time you criticised the government, people called you a "spy" or something awful like that. Wouldn't that be the best way to control the people like sheep?

DO NOT be a sheep, question everything! I am sure you're intelligent enough to know that.


If your open minded read this: http://christianitybeliefs.org/end-times-deceptions/

I am sure you will have questions and doubts so fire away
Original post by Anonymous
I was born and raised Muslim. The faith has a lot of good things about it.

However recently, I am starting to have doubts. I'm not as religious as I used to be. Particularly being a female, I find some parts of Islam extremely sexist.

For example women have to cover up, men can take up to 4 wives, Muslim women must only marry Muslim men, underage girls are allowed to marry as soon as start puberty ,women aren't allowed to leave the house without a male relative, women will make up the majority in hellfire because they are ungrateful to their husbands , sex slaves are permissible during war, woman's testimony often counts half of a man's testimony, women inheritance half that of a man, a woman must always obey her husband etc.

But I've read up on all the above and I do appreciate some of them give good reasons as to why. But one thing I can't get over is the fact our prophet Muhammed (pbuh) married Aisha (r.a) when she was only 6 years old. The reason I've heard include those were the times it happened a lot then, She contributed to the spread of Muhammad's(pbuh) message and served the Muslim community for 44 years after his death, the marriage not being consummated until she had reached puberty at the age of nine or ten years old etc. It's really hard for me to overlook.

But seriously if some joe public did that everyone would find it disgusting. What makes it a problem for me is that men are meant to follow the sunnah of the prophet. This means it's ok for Muslim men to take underage bride. It happens a lot in Afghanistan, Pakistan etc.

I'm just starting to lose my faith a little and it is mostly to do with its attitude towards women.


I think it is best if you do go talk to a scholar or imam because some of your reasons for doubt aren't really good reasons. For example, we do believe that there will be more women in heaven than men in the end. http://islamqa.org/hanafi/daruliftaa-birmingham/19407

So it is better to go ask someone knowledgeable :smile:
Original post by ABadManTing
If your open minded read this: http://christianitybeliefs.org/end-times-deceptions/

I am sure you will have questions and doubts so fire away


So you are using Christianity to cast doubt on Islam?

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