I'm in a horrible situation and I don't know what to do

Hey, firstly I am really sorry to hear what you've had to endure. No person should suffer such vile treatment and I can only hope that it does not plague your future. The way that others are treating you is very difficult to relate with, I personally don't feel much sympathy for his part and believe that you have suffered and are entitled to feel hostile towards him. Its a shame it has gone this way as I fear it may cause a permanent rift between you and family so sadly I cannot offer any advice on how to fix that.

My only advice would be to somehow (and I know this is very hard) ignore this and focus on returning to university. Once you are out of the house and away from home you should feel better, you will feel alone sadly and very isolated and very anxious over this month so if you feel like you need a friend or even an ear be sure to PM me as I would be happy to talk to you when you are done. I am sorry to hear what you have suffered.

Thank you so much for your kind response. I'm doing my best to focus on going back to university and honestly I can't wait to get away from my hometown again. It's just difficult when I miss my mum so much but every time I go round to see her he is there and won't go out and let me have time with my mum.
When I confessed the abuse to my mum she cried and seemed to blame herself, but hasn't spoken about it to me since and as far as I know hasn't brought up with my brother. It's difficult because I know he's her son and she will love him no matter what but I feel like no one was there to protect me as a child and no one is respecting my feelings now. It's hard to stop myself feeling like what happened to me didn't matter.

Perhaps you could take your mother out? Go for a meal or even for a walk? He doesn't need to know why or where you are going, it would help for you and your mum to have private time together without someone else being there.

Hi, I'm really sorry to hear your story.
Very touching. I don't mean to sound harsh / firm, but my advice is to DO YOU. You have a responsibility to yourself to get on the right path & be happy for yourself. This isn't about your mum, this is about ensuring YOUR happiness.
You've had to endure such a horrible experience in the past and you've done so well to have moved on in life. Please don't look back & don't let that fool of a brother / any family member drag you back to that dark place ever again.
You've got a supportive boyfriend who you can trust & who has your back. Remember that.
Ultimately, all that matters is your happiness & anything that's going to stop you from being in your happy place, you've got to let it go.

Has your brother apologised or shown any kind of remorse for how he treated you? Has he made any effort to build bridges with you? If so, maybe give him a second chance but I would stay well clear of him if he doesn't care how much suffering his behaviour has caused you.
You seem genuinely afraid of him so your parents need to respect that you're not ready to have a proper relationship yet. Your mental health has to come first.

perhaps you should think about trying to forgive your brother? I know it's not going to be easy and it will take time to stop feeling scared of him but it sounds like he has changed and is not the same person you knew as a child, letting go of some of your negative feelings and reconciling with your family would probably be better for you too in the long run

I hope you don't think I'm being super insensitive with this but I have been in a similar situation and I know that letting go and moving on was much better for me

Nope. No effort whatsoever on his part to even acknowledge what he has done. I don't think he believes what he did was wrong, as no one has ever questioned him about it. Yeah me and my mum haven't spoken for three days... it's breaking my heart but I need to do what's right for me.

I totally agree I should forgive him, and I'm working on that. It doesn't help to hold such strong feelings about someone. However, I don't think forgiving someone always means you have to go back and patch things up with them. You can forgive someone and forget them, if that's what's best for you.

I completely agree. These things get very difficult when family are involved, your parents probably feel that there is nothing your brother could ever do to make them disown him and while they want you safe now - you are in reality (although I know you don't feel it). If it was an ex boyfriend or someone you'd never have to see them again but this is your brother and the only way to never see him again is to basically cut contact with your whole family - that's a massive loss to you. The way I thought about it was that the person had really taken enough from me I was going to do what made me happiest now rather than letting them take any more from me. I'm just offering an alternative - will leaving your entire family behind make your life better? or would trying to move on make you happier?

What a bad bad situation!
You poor thing!!!!

Can you get someone else to talk to your mother and explain things?
An aunt or someone?

The trouble is that your mother has one relationship with your brother (and it's up to her what she does), but you have your own relationship, and that is not for your family to tell you what you must do.

Go your own way and try not to hate your family.
But stay strong and remember it is your decision.
You do NOT have to endure him if you don't want to.
(No matter what anyone says).

Are your parents aware of your suicide attempts and the counselling? If they are then they are dicks that aren't worth the effort fo trying to patch things p with. If they aren't, try getting either of them alone, when the situation is raised bring up the fact that you did all this stuff, because of what he did to you. Worst comes to the worst, they don't listen, and at that point they aren't your family anyway.
I would have thought it was worth mentioning to the university that you are starting to slip back into depression, if nothing else. They can get you some help and might get in contact with your family explaining the situation to them a bit.

Yeah, they are. I don't think it's that simple a situation where I can just cut off contact with my parents. I have spoken to uni and they know I suffer from depression.

Do they know your brother's behaviour towards you caused it?

Well, it was due to a lot of different things going on in my life at the time, my brother's abuse being one of them. They know that.