How do YOU deal with a break up?

Are you male/female? Breaking up with someone you're still in love with vs not? How did your feelings change over time e.g. 1 week after break up vs months? What kinda relationship do you have with your ex now e.g. are you on speaking terms? How did you get over them, if you even got over them?

Alot of people from my school are mutual friends with her. Since I left school and going to a different college from everyone else, it shouldn't be so bad. But it was hell during the final months as well as revision for GCSE's. Made me paranoid and much more depressed. Like, I feel like I am a bad person for breaking up with someone I love. However, it hurts even more when someone you love disrespects you, messes around by placing a "break" on me and giving me a reason ( a real reason but not a valid reason to put me on a break). She lost feelings for me and got bored. Hence why she mentioned I should be funny and not boring which hurt me alot. But in the end I still feel like I'm a bad person. Gas lighting perhaps? It's the people who screw you over that are doing well. I also lost a few friends too.

The best way to get over them is to get a piece of paper out and in the middle write... "why it wouldn't work out with [insert name]" and then make a spider diagram with all their flaws etc...

This has helped me tremendously to get over somebody. Whenever I felt like crap and felt the feeling to go back I would always check the paper and it would make me feel better.

You should try it?

Female, I thought I loved him (I think I was more obsessed than in love - it was my first relationship)

Took around 3 months. I dumped him on my birthday after he gave me a £3 plastic necklace I saw him mum put in the bin months previously. Sounds really shallow - but before this he would stop me seeing my friends and even forced me into sexual stuff (4 years on i still remember how sick i felt). The necklace was a slap round the face, a wake up call that i needed to get out.

During the 3 months i would continously text/call and try and meet up with him. Thinking back it was almost stalkerish, but you must bear in mind that i lost all my friends and mum was having counselling - I had no-one. But after 3 months it no longer hurt. Idk why, just one day he wasn't the first thing i thought of when i woke up. At first I would forget about him for a few hours. Then a day. Then a few days which has now turned into months (:

I now have a new boyfriend who I've been with for 3 years. And everything is pretty great. I promise anyone who is reading this, if you are in an abusive relationahip - GET OUT. Its the best thing you'll ever do. I don't regret it at all. If you have doubts about someone - listen to your gut!

Female and was in love with my ex.

Month 1- Cried my eyes out, ate pizza and over 20 chocolate digestives packets within 2 weeks.
Month 2- Facebook stalking
Month 3- Went out on dates with other guys
Month 4- Revised and revised
After Month 5- Revised for exams and lost weight.

I do have my days where I miss him but I'll get past it

Guy 1: first relationship, he got really weird and obsessive, I broke it off over text (I was 13 if that makes it less bad...), I was pretty sad for a few days but it was only 2 or so months that we were together... he contacted me a year or so later but we just never spoke again
Guy 2: he broke up with me on a group chat? together almost 6 months and I was so heartbroken... for about 2 weeks, and got into a rebound relationship. He's actually a close mate of mine now, this was a good 3 years ago though so I think I'm over it by now
Guy 3: rebound relationship, started going out because he asked me out when I was drunk and I thought "how bad can it be?". Turns out it was bad, 2 months in he got a bit possessive and I wasn't feeling it, we broke up and I felt nothing. We were friends for a few years after until he got with my friend and cheated on her a few times, so I'm glad that's all over
Guy 4: together for a year and a bit, love of my life, we broke up because my mental health got unbearable for him. I was utterly distraught for a month or so, but was determined to recover for him. We got back together after he saw how hard I was fighting against it all, and we'll have been together for 2 years this September.

Are you male/female? Breaking up with someone you're still in love with vs not? How did your feelings change over time e.g. 1 week after break up vs months? What kinda relationship do you have with your ex now e.g. are you on speaking terms? How did you get over them, if you even got over them?

Are you male/female? Breaking up with someone you're still in love with vs not? How did your feelings change over time e.g. 1 week after break up vs months? What kinda relationship do you have with your ex now e.g. are you on speaking terms? How did you get over them, if you even got over them?

Guy 1: first relationship, he got really weird and obsessive, I broke it off over text (I was 13 if that makes it less bad...), I was pretty sad for a few days but it was only 2 or so months that we were together... he contacted me a year or so later but we just never spoke again
Guy 2: he broke up with me on a group chat? together almost 6 months and I was so heartbroken... for about 2 weeks, and got into a rebound relationship. He's actually a close mate of mine now, this was a good 3 years ago though so I think I'm over it by now
Guy 3: rebound relationship, started going out because he asked me out when I was drunk and I thought "how bad can it be?". Turns out it was bad, 2 months in he got a bit possessive and I wasn't feeling it, we broke up and I felt nothing. We were friends for a few years after until he got with my friend and cheated on her a few times, so I'm glad that's all over
Guy 4: together for a year and a bit, love of my life, we broke up because my mental health got unbearable for him. I was utterly distraught for a month or so, but was determined to recover for him. We got back together after he saw how hard I was fighting against it all, and we'll have been together for 2 years this September.