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how can he just delete me from his life........

my bf broke up with my about a week ago and i am still so sad about it. we were together about a yr and hes been with his friends a lot past few months and ive always been there for him but he just pushed me away and said in the end we not good for each other. im so upset i know ppl say it gets better with time but im still inconsolable. i spent as much time as i can with my family & friends but they have their own lives and bfs and im just so unmotivated to do stuff for myself. it horrible because he been adding girls on fb i can see and stuff i dont understand what i could of done to make it that i am so easily erasable from his life i was there for him when he had no friends no job and yh just relly hurts right now :frown: :frown: :frown: i hoping when he busy with work again and cant maintain his friendships he will see how good i was to him not that i think we ever get back but i just miss him a lot right now and basiclly just feel kicked to the kirb and replaced. :frown::frown::frown: hard to stop crying right now

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Original post by Anonymous
my bf broke up with my about a week ago and i am still so sad about it. we were together about a yr and hes been with his friends a lot past few months and ive always been there for him but he just pushed me away and said in the end we not good for each other. im so upset i know ppl say it gets better with time but im still inconsolable. i spent as much time as i can with my family & friends but they have their own lives and bfs and im just so unmotivated to do stuff for myself. it horrible because he been adding girls on fb i can see and stuff i dont understand what i could of done to make it that i am so easily erasable from his life i was there for him when he had no friends no job and yh just relly hurts right now :frown: :frown: :frown: i hoping when he busy with work again and cant maintain his friendships he will see how good i was to him not that i think we ever get back but i just miss him a lot right now and basiclly just feel kicked to the kirb and replaced. :frown::frown::frown: hard to stop crying right now


It's tough, I know, and you're unconsolable - fair enough. It should get better over time, and annoyingly there is nothing to speed up the process of grieving.

However, you slow down the process by actively looking at their facebook, checking new friends girls in particular) - it's just not healthy, and if I were you I would block your ex so that you don't see any of this stuff by force.
Reply 2
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by SeanFM
It's tough, I know, and you're unconsolable - fair enough. It should get better over time, and annoyingly there is nothing to speed up the process of grieving.

However, you slow down the process by actively looking at their facebook, checking new friends girls in particular) - it's just not healthy, and if I were you I would block your ex so that you don't see any of this stuff by force.


i was going to delete him but he been such a big part of my life and said still want to be friend and i feel like deleting him im just prepared to delete that big part of my life. i feel like im not ready to cut it off like that lol sounds so stupid i know :/ :/ :/
Reply 3
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Zarek
21
Sexual relationships are strange because when they go wrong there appears to be no bond left. Totally different to family relationships. It hurts, and all I can say is that when you find the right person it's different. Keep the faith.
Original post by Anonymous
my bf broke up with my about a week ago and i am still so sad about it. we were together about a yr and hes been with his friends a lot past few months and ive always been there for him but he just pushed me away and said in the end we not good for each other. im so upset i know ppl say it gets better with time but im still inconsolable. i spent as much time as i can with my family & friends but they have their own lives and bfs and im just so unmotivated to do stuff for myself. it horrible because he been adding girls on fb i can see and stuff i dont understand what i could of done to make it that i am so easily erasable from his life i was there for him when he had no friends no job and yh just relly hurts right now :frown: :frown: :frown: i hoping when he busy with work again and cant maintain his friendships he will see how good i was to him not that i think we ever get back but i just miss him a lot right now and basiclly just feel kicked to the kirb and replaced. :frown::frown::frown: hard to stop crying right now


wtf.... Thats fked up. You there since he had no job/friends and just done that.... I wouldn't EVER do that neither would a normal person... just be glad that motherf***er is gone, his loss, I'm sure there are people out there want someone as good as he had.
Original post by Anonymous
i was going to delete him but he been such a big part of my life and said still want to be friend and i feel like deleting him im just prepared to delete that big part of my life. i feel like im not ready to cut it off like that lol sounds so stupid i know :/ :/ :/


Just delete him and block him and everything for your own sake, then in 6months or something when you finally don't care you could end up being friends again anyway. Life works in mysterious ways.
Original post by Anonymous
i was going to delete him but he been such a big part of my life and said still want to be friend and i feel like deleting him im just prepared to delete that big part of my life. i feel like im not ready to cut it off like that lol sounds so stupid i know :/ :/ :/


Doesn't sound stupid at all, I can totally relate. It's a huge step to take and not easy to let go, and people often want to compromise and stay as 'friends' when to me that says that one party still feels something or wants more, and it's just not a nice situation to be in, and eventually you realise that there's probably no real benefit to staying friends with them and you go your seperate ways.

It's best to bite the bullet as soon as you are ready and click that block button, and after a while you will feel much better.
Reply 7
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by ckfeister
wtf.... Thats fked up. You there since he had no job/friends and just done that.... I wouldn't EVER do that neither would a normal person... just be glad that motherf***er is gone, his loss, I'm sure there are people out there want someone as good as he had.


i kno i think thats part of why its hard right now i cant understand why im now not loveable to him. i get after honeymoon phases things slow down but ive always been there and im not badmouthing him but he done so many things to hurt me along the way in the way that when ive been in a bad place he hasn't reciprocated the effort but i always let it go. in my gut i feel like he wants to be with other girls because he doesn't need to chase me now so im not exciting enough :/ :frown:
Reply 8
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Anonymous #1
OP
Original post by SeanFM
Doesn't sound stupid at all, I can totally relate. It's a huge step to take and not easy to let go, and people often want to compromise and stay as 'friends' when to me that says that one party still feels something or wants more, and it's just not a nice situation to be in, and eventually you realise that there's probably no real benefit to staying friends with them and you go your seperate ways.

It's best to bite the bullet as soon as you are ready and click that block button, and after a while you will feel much better.


thanks, i might delete facebook so im not tempted to look in the meantime lol before him ive always pushed guys away because i always have this wall up because im scared to be played and he knew how hard a shell i kept up. he was the first person i slept with too so just feeling not only hurt but betrayed my trust as well :/ i just wanna be on my own for a long while now lol
Reply 9
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Anonymous #1
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Original post by SuperHuman98
Just delete him and block him and everything for your own sake, then in 6months or something when you finally don't care you could end up being friends again anyway. Life works in mysterious ways.


yeh i kno i should maybe i just delete my own facebook for now. i was with him in uni and i dont live there anymore so i doubt we would cross paths again :/
It will take time to get over him but you will get there. Best thing to do now is get on with your life as if he was never a part of it and soon it will feel as though he never was. Love is experienced as chemicals are triggered inside the brain, sometimes these processes are stopped and the person falls out of love and loses interest. For you this hasn't yet occurred so you will be feeling rather bad at the moment for him it could be unemotional. Don't give him the power to make you feel like this cut him out your life and never look back
Reply 11
Avatar for Xenice
Xenice
17
It seems strange that he just ended it. Was it that abrupt? Surely he could've at-least told you 'I don't think it will work out anymore' - or something along the lines of that. But...

Just carry on with your daily life. Don't let this be on your mind everyday; don't let it consume you and turn you into a different person. Strive for your goals, and don't worry too much about it. Someday in the end, he may grow to love you or even better - you may find someone else who loves you more.
(edited 7 years ago)
I don't know if this will make you feel better bc it has an sad tune however it has AMAZING lyrics...makes u more motivated...
[video="youtube;CqNp-KXiAHo"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqNp-KXiAHo[/video]
Reply 13
Avatar for mmb10
mmb10
3
I think you should message him and ask him tbh. Like why, what did you do? The least he can do is tell you and who knows you might come out stronger and a better person depending on what he says. Either way, its a life lesson to learn and just explain your feelings. I know pride absolutely sucks at this stage but tell him you want to give it another go and if hes not up for it just ask why so it can allow you to move on with a peace of mind.
Original post by Anonymous
my bf broke up with my about a week ago and i am still so sad about it. we were together about a yr and hes been with his friends a lot past few months and ive always been there for him but he just pushed me away and said in the end we not good for each other. im so upset i know ppl say it gets better with time but im still inconsolable. i spent as much time as i can with my family & friends but they have their own lives and bfs and im just so unmotivated to do stuff for myself. it horrible because he been adding girls on fb i can see and stuff i dont understand what i could of done to make it that i am so easily erasable from his life i was there for him when he had no friends no job and yh just relly hurts right now :frown: :frown: :frown: i hoping when he busy with work again and cant maintain his friendships he will see how good i was to him not that i think we ever get back but i just miss him a lot right now and basiclly just feel kicked to the kirb and replaced. :frown::frown::frown: hard to stop crying right now


Best thing to do is block him completely out, it is not healthy to go through his facebook at all.
Original post by Rock Fan
Best thing to do is block him completely out, it is not healthy to go through his facebook at all.


Can you expand on what you mean by it's not healthy?
Its tough, but maybe he wasnt as nice as you thought. The best way to recover the quickest will be to delete him completely and get on with your life. Its only been a week. It will get better over time.
Original post by postexamtalk
Can you expand on what you mean by it's not healthy?


The more you continue you look at what he does the more you feel bad and the harder it is to move on especially if he goes and finds someone else, blocking all contact makes it easier in the long run to move on.
Original post by Xenice
It seems strange that he just ended it. Was it that abrupt? Surely he could've at-least told you 'I don't think it will work out anymore' - or something along the lines of that. But...

Just carry on with your daily life. Don't let this be on your mind everyday; don't let it consume you and turn you into a different person. Strive for your goals, and don't worry too much about it. Someday in the end, he may grow to love you or even better - you may find someone else who loves you more.


basically went on a break may time then together again june and since then each week that gone on he made less and less effort with me as in less messaging, no phoning and didnt ask my down once to see him - i was the instigator in each time we met up. he did say he wanna take things slow when we started back up and i did say something to him about making more effort but every time i did he would just be like "ok" or call me suffocating lol i dont think i was that bad though. he used to message me all the time and always ask to meet up so i think deep down it cause he doesnt have to chase me anymore so im not exciting enough anymore :/ :/ im insecure and shy in myself naturally so feel like hes found someone better and prettier :/

thankyou for the advice its hard to believe it right now i just would love however many days weeks months down the line for him to realize that i am a good person and i was there for him because his friends who was not there previous well be surprised if they there in the future.... :/
Original post by Anonymous
my bf broke up with my about a week ago and i am still so sad about it. we were together about a yr and hes been with his friends a lot past few months and ive always been there for him but he just pushed me away and said in the end we not good for each other. im so upset i know ppl say it gets better with time but im still inconsolable. i spent as much time as i can with my family & friends but they have their own lives and bfs and im just so unmotivated to do stuff for myself. it horrible because he been adding girls on fb i can see and stuff i dont understand what i could of done to make it that i am so easily erasable from his life i was there for him when he had no friends no job and yh just relly hurts right now :frown: :frown: :frown: i hoping when he busy with work again and cant maintain his friendships he will see how good i was to him not that i think we ever get back but i just miss him a lot right now and basiclly just feel kicked to the kirb and replaced. :frown::frown::frown: hard to stop crying right now


He sounds like a filthy peasant not worth worrying about.

Sincerely,
a dude.

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