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The fibs your teacher told you in school [golden thread]

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You're destined for failure without a revision table
Original post by Ice Dragon
There was always that story about that kid who swung back too far on his chair and died or cracked his head open lol :colonhash:

One teacher tried to tell us that she was allowed to keep us after school without parents permission if we misbehaved and tried to enforce it too. Unsurprisingly, she got fired.


At my Secondary school they kept you back for compulsory revision lessons at times, they did sometimes have teachers in the yard directing students to ensure the students attended them.Was this not normal at most schools?
Original post by B_9710
They'll cover it up by saying they meant 90% UMS.


They don't though like at my college your work was always marked as 80%-A etc and it went through an online system like that.My A Level Geography teacher was always insistent on this rule even though he marked exams.I do think the teachers are aware of this and want to make us work harder.
I have reminded myself that one of the big lies is how much homework you get like primary schools will tell you how you will get 1 hour a day at secondary school and then college will tell you how you will get three hours a week per subject but none of this is true.My primary school also made us do this piece of work they said you had to do for secondary school and when I went to secondary they didn't know anything about it.
that your GCSE's are worth a damn
Everything my Physics teacher told me, he was only there for a year contract and within two weeks of him starting they had got someone permanent so from September to July he taught us absolute bs and put on films, needless to say YouTube helped me pass Physics.
Science teacher told us not to drink the pure alcohols (ethanol and such) during the coloured flames test, because even a finger dips worth would turn you blind. Cue 3 boys and myself in the back corner of the class egging each other to dip and lick our fingers multiple times. 2 ended up puking, myself and another lad ended up tipsy... no one went blind.*attention* I am not advising people to drink anything from a science lab! I was just a rebellious idiot.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Dalek1099
They determined what set I was in and my GCSE target grades so I'd say very important.Many clever people found themselves stuck in the English 2nd set after not doing well in their SATs, for some reason very little change took place although one person did manage to move up in Y10.


What year are you in now? My year was the complicated year when a lot of school rebelled against SATs so my school did them but they were internally marked. The rest of my friends (from 4 different schools) didn't even do them, so we were just placed in sets based on our CAT scores in year 7. GCSE target grades were made in year 9 when they actually knew our abilities. And for us, moving sets was a frequent deal because they were constantly trying to fit people where they were best suited. I know of someone who moved from set 3 to set 1 in maths in year 9 because he made a drastic improvement since starting school. It just depends on each school I guess, but definitely for me, SATs literally didn't matter since the vast majority of my year didn't take them.
Original post by Dalek1099
They determined what set I was in and my GCSE target grades so I'd say very important.Many clever people found themselves stuck in the English 2nd set after not doing well in their SATs, for some reason very little change took place although one person did manage to move up in Y10.


What year are you in now? My year was the complicated year when a lot of school rebelled against SATs so my school did them but they were internally marked. The rest of my friends (from 4 different schools) didn't even do them, so we were just placed in sets based on our CAT scores in year 7. GCSE target grades were made in year 9 when they actually knew our abilities. And for us, moving sets was a frequent deal because they were constantly trying to fit people where they were best suited. I know of someone who moved from set 3 to set 1 in maths in year 9 because he made a drastic improvement since starting school. It just depends on each school I guess, but definitely for me, SATs literally didn't matter since the vast majority of my year didn't take them.
Refusing to predict me a higher grade because they didn't think I'd achieve it :frown:
If you swing on your chair you will fall "back and crack your head open" 😒
Original post by Squishy Pixelz
Why curry? I can understand coffee or cupcakes or even melon. But not curry


She was Indian :smile:
she told us stories about her homemade curry all year and we begged to try it.
I think I commented but not sure if it posted but oh well:

Teacher: It's only a short essay, it'll take 2-3 hours.
*11 hours later*
Student: WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME?!??!?!?!?

This fib is always told, no mater the school or age! Tell me the real length so I can actually plan my time and not leave it for the last minute because of your so called: 2-3 hour essay!
Anything in KS3 Chemistry, GCSE Chemistry and probably A-level Chemistry (if I'd taken it any further to find out what is actually true).

Original post by junayd1998
When they tell you to stop rocking on your chair because " they knew someone who cracked their head open doing it" no you didn't boss.


When they told us that they added that said person lost a bucketful of blood before the ambulance got there. :eek:
Telling us that a particular topic was not on the GCSE syllabus – despite showing the teacher the syllabus, he claimed we had the wrong version and that the reason why the specimen paper contained said topic was that they sometimes add random stuff to try it out. Of course he was the one operating off an old syllabus and he had to send all of our parents a letter of apology.

Original post by Ice Dragon
One teacher tried to tell us that she was allowed to keep us after school without parents permission if we misbehaved and tried to enforce it too. Unsurprisingly, she got fired.


If you go to school in England then she's correct.
That we would use Roman numbers up to 100 -_-
That we would use Roman numbers up to 100 -_-
Our teacher in primary school told us that if we didn't do homework birds would inform her about it xD (we believed :P )
our french teacher said everyone who got A's and A*'s on their controlled assessment will get pizza on the last day of term- im still waiting
''i promise i have marked it but I forgot it at home''

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