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I love doing stinky, hot farts which linger for ages but gf doesnt like them!

So i eat a lot of protein resulting in really stinky, sticky, methane like farts which i happily do in front of gf.
Problem is she doesnt appreciate it, even though scientific studies prove its good for you to inhale them.
What should i do?
Intake 0 fibre so you can huge dried grotesque stools filling the airwaves hence normalising the smell to your gf and slowly start to take in fibre thereby reducing the level of smell over time. This will allow your gf to enjoy your silly shenanigans as she has adapted to the high level nuclear smell to which presides in you.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by ALittleLost25
So i eat a lot of protein resulting in really stinky, sticky, methane like farts which i happily do in front of gf.
Problem is she doesnt appreciate it, even though scientific studies prove its good for you to inhale them.
What should i do?


Methane is a VOC. It isn't good for you; it effects brain in a negative way
Reply 3
Avatar for UWS
UWS
21
Fart more, but honestly... What the hell?
Original post by UWS
Fart more, but honestly... What the hell?


Strong reply to avatar ratio
Reply 5
Avatar for SMEGGGY
SMEGGGY
21
Original post by ALittleLost25
So i eat a lot of protein resulting in really stinky, sticky, methane like farts which i happily do in front of gf.
Problem is she doesnt appreciate it, even though scientific studies prove its good for you to inhale them.
What should i do?


You ever follow through?

Dutch oven is the best



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wait if they are sticky does that mean you give out a weird rectum liquid... nope do not want to think about that
I'd recommend eating more spicy food.
Original post by retro_turtles
wait if they are sticky does that mean you give out a weird rectum liquid... nope do not want to think about that


You know the really hot ones you do say after a curry? When it comes out your underwear feels really warm, that's what I meant.
What a coincidence. So do I!
Original post by ALittleLost25
You know the really hot ones you do say after a curry? When it comes out your underwear feels really warm, that's what I meant.

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I actually cried out of laughter when I read the title, thanks OP! :toofunny:

Spoiler

Original post by Electrospective
I actually cried out of laughter when I read the title, thanks OP! :toofunny:

Spoiler



If she cant handle me at my worst, she doesnt deserve me at my best
Original post by ALittleLost25
If she cant handle me at my worst, she doesnt deserve me at my best


Very true. :colonhash:
the fastest way to your Gf's heart is a stinky fart.

Do you do a loud trumpet fart or do you prefer the covert quiet fart without warning? When you are in bed, do you fart under the duvet and let the aroma linger?

If your Gf does not like your farts, you should ditch her and find a woman who can fart back.

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