The Student Room Group

I feel lonely and shattered-HELP

I am an 18-year-old female; jobless(HOW DO I GET A JOB), lifeless, scared for the unknown and unmotivated.

I feel lonely in the sense that everybody i know seems to be moving on in life, be it that they are going to university in September or just have their life planned out.:frown:

I also have self-esteem issues which also impact me a lot.:redface:

I am socially awkward. I have next to no friends and i guess i am just depressed about life.

I don't like my height, i look 12, 13 at most, although it depends on what i am wearing mostly.

I just know if ANY man will take an interest in me.

Will i be lonely for ever?:frown:

I am not the most ambitious person.:frown: In fact i lack motivation most of the time.

I hated school, came out with bad grades and now do BTEC in the hope of being a child nurse one day.

I just feel like i am inadequate for everything really, from school to general life.

I sometimes feel jealous of my siblings(older and younger sister) a) they are smarter than me b)they excel academically more than me. They did not have to do BTEC.:redface:

I just don't want people looking down on me as a person.:frown:


I feel like my life is a mess and that i won't amount to anything.:redface:

Lots of people look down on BTEC and think nursing is a poor career to be in.

I know that it does not matter what people think as my self worth should come from my own happiness but its hard when people ask me what you study and i say "BTEC health and social care". It just makes it seem like you are not clever enough or that was the course you had to do.


I need help, how can i regain back my dignity?

Any advice??

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1
You need real friend in this time and stay away from what bother you . ask god to show you the
corret way . And you must know every body has reason to stay in this life . little yoga and tai-chi maybe help you so do it .

I was have same your proplem but after yoga and know frind who understand me I feel beter .
Don `t give up and Remember that : God does not create anything in vain.
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I am an 18-year-old female; jobless(HOW DO I GET A JOB), lifeless, scared for the unknown and unmotivated.

I feel lonely in the sense that everybody i know seems to be moving on in life, be it that they are going to university in September or just have their life planned out.:frown:

I also have self-esteem issues which also impact me a lot.:redface:

I am socially awkward. I have next to no friends and i guess i am just depressed about life.

I don't like my height, i look 12, 13 at most, although it depends on what i am wearing mostly.

I just know if ANY man will take an interest in me.

Will i be lonely for ever?:frown:

I am not the most ambitious person.:frown: In fact i lack motivation most of the time.

I hated school, came out with bad grades and now do BTEC in the hope of being a child nurse one day.

I just feel like i am inadequate for everything really, from school to general life.

I sometimes feel jealous of my siblings(older and younger sister) a) they are smarter than me b)they excel academically more than me. They did not have to do BTEC.:redface:

I just don't want people looking down on me as a person.:frown:


I feel like my life is a mess and that i won't amount to anything.:redface:

Lots of people look down on BTEC and think nursing is a poor career to be in.

I know that it does not matter what people think as my self worth should come from my own happiness but its hard when people ask me what you study and i say "BTEC health and social care". It just makes it seem like you are not clever enough or that was the course you had to do.


I need help, how can i regain back my dignity?

Any advice??


Ignore what everyone is saying about BTECs, you have an end goal in mind- to be a child nurse which I would say is a very rewarding career and something which is valuable in our society. How many people can say they help to improve the quality of life of sick children everyday?
Do some volunteering whether that be in a charity shop or a nursery so you have something to write in your CV and personal statement. Print out loads of copies of your CV and hand them into anywhere for example shops in your town, restaurants anywhere you can think of!
well at least you're not me, a graduate who is literally lost
Reply 4
Original post by shawn_o1
well at least you're not me, a graduate who is literally lost


I am the original poster.

If you don't mind me asking, what did you study?
Reply 5
Original post by seaji
You need real friend in this time and stay away from what bother you . ask god to show you the
corret way . And you must know every body has reason to stay in this life . little yoga and tai-chi maybe help you so do it .

I was have same your proplem but after yoga and know frind who understand me I feel beter .
Don `t give up and Remember that : God does not create anything in vain.


I don't have any friends.:smile:
PM me, I’m sure we can be friends :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
I am the original poster.

If you don't mind me asking, what did you study?


Computer Science.
But that's literally all I did (study) - it's now over a year since I graduated and I only have three months of work to show for it. "Only" three months - employers will quickly figure out that I only have myself to blame for losing work so easily, and give me zero chance.
Plus I didn't do anything particularly "brilliantly" during my uni years (despite graduating with a first).
So, like the other posters said - ignore those who look down on BTECs, they're the ones who expect everything to be handed to them just because they succeeded academically. Only you can make it happen (your destiny, that is).
Original post by Anonymous
I am an 18-year-old female; jobless(HOW DO I GET A JOB), lifeless, scared for the unknown and unmotivated.

I feel lonely in the sense that everybody i know seems to be moving on in life, be it that they are going to university in September or just have their life planned out.:frown:

I also have self-esteem issues which also impact me a lot.:redface:

I am socially awkward. I have next to no friends and i guess i am just depressed about life.

I don't like my height, i look 12, 13 at most, although it depends on what i am wearing mostly.

I just know if ANY man will take an interest in me.

Will i be lonely for ever?:frown:

I am not the most ambitious person.:frown: In fact i lack motivation most of the time.

I hated school, came out with bad grades and now do BTEC in the hope of being a child nurse one day.

I just feel like i am inadequate for everything really, from school to general life.

I sometimes feel jealous of my siblings(older and younger sister) a) they are smarter than me b)they excel academically more than me. They did not have to do BTEC.:redface:

I just don't want people looking down on me as a person.:frown:


I feel like my life is a mess and that i won't amount to anything.:redface:

Lots of people look down on BTEC and think nursing is a poor career to be in.

I know that it does not matter what people think as my self worth should come from my own happiness but its hard when people ask me what you study and i say "BTEC health and social care". It just makes it seem like you are not clever enough or that was the course you had to do.


I need help, how can i regain back my dignity?

Any advice??

I feel like this all the time. PM me if you want :wink:
god works in mysterious ways.
All the best
Original post by Anonymous
I am an 18-year-old female; jobless(HOW DO I GET A JOB), lifeless, scared for the unknown and unmotivated.

I feel lonely in the sense that everybody i know seems to be moving on in life, be it that they are going to university in September or just have their life planned out.:frown:

I also have self-esteem issues which also impact me a lot.:redface:

I am socially awkward. I have next to no friends and i guess i am just depressed about life.

I don't like my height, i look 12, 13 at most, although it depends on what i am wearing mostly.

I just know if ANY man will take an interest in me.

Will i be lonely for ever?:frown:

I am not the most ambitious person.:frown: In fact i lack motivation most of the time.

I hated school, came out with bad grades and now do BTEC in the hope of being a child nurse one day.

I just feel like i am inadequate for everything really, from school to general life.

I sometimes feel jealous of my siblings(older and younger sister) a) they are smarter than me b)they excel academically more than me. They did not have to do BTEC.:redface:

I just don't want people looking down on me as a person.:frown:


I feel like my life is a mess and that i won't amount to anything.:redface:

Lots of people look down on BTEC and think nursing is a poor career to be in.

I know that it does not matter what people think as my self worth should come from my own happiness but its hard when people ask me what you study and i say "BTEC health and social care". It just makes it seem like you are not clever enough or that was the course you had to do.


I need help, how can i regain back my dignity?

Any advice??


Its people out there ding worst jobs than that and are happy, i say at least you have a path/career you are headed torwards and you wont be lonely forever someone will eventually what to spend the rest of their life with you, you just havent ran into them yet
Original post by Roperjacob
Its people out there ding worst jobs than that and are happy, i say at least you have a path/career you are headed torwards and you wont be lonely forever someone will eventually what to spend the rest of their life with you, you just havent ran into them yet


I seriously wish:frown:
Original post by shawn_o1
Computer Science.
But that's literally all I did (study) - it's now over a year since I graduated and I only have three months of work to show for it. "Only" three months - employers will quickly figure out that I only have myself to blame for losing work so easily, and give me zero chance.
Plus I didn't do anything particularly "brilliantly" during my uni years (despite graduating with a first).
So, like the other posters said - ignore those who look down on BTECs, they're the ones who expect everything to be handed to them just because they succeeded academically. Only you can make it happen (your destiny, that is).


That is a good degree.

I am pretty sure you will find jobs easily with that

Its all about perseverance.
OP, you wrote the post, well done. It means you have won half the battle, you are half way on the road to where you want to be.

Your life is not the next few years. Its the next 60 years. A lot will happen between now and then. Your life will take many many different turns. Every turn will be your own decision. Just trust your own instincts.

By starting this thread you have started solving your problems. All the best in your life.
Original post by Anonymous


1. Life isnt a race. You will find many people make great plans then stuff happens and they crash out, so dont think everyone knows or will succeed in their life plan. Syop comparing and focus on you.

2. Self esteem can be dealt with by counseling/ therapy to stop comparing yourself plys focus or find out what you cna do. Voluntary work is a good start.

3. Socially awkward- we all have to learn.

4. Accept your height unless you are going for stilts. Your looks you cna learn to make more of plus working out can change your body shape for the better. Its also great for dealing with confidence and depression.

5. If you are in constant pity party then you will have trouble finding a man becayse nobody really wants someone who is depressed and miserbale, hence do the confidence boosting things above. Dont worry though its not attraction from men thats importnat its attraction from the right one. Confidence is a great attractor. Dont worry too much you have all your twenties and more to learn about dating.

6. You dont have to be amibitious except I think everyone should aspire to making themself happy. Use that as your focus.

7. Btec is fine, but you need good results, hence work hard.

8. You just sound a bit down, all teenagers go through it, take it slowly, dont beat up on yourself and make some changes as suggested above. ince you make small changes then it becomes easier and the outlook more positive. You just have to build and keep making progress.

9. Stop worrying about what people think or do and focus on what you think and do. You and maybe your parents are the only ones you might consider impressing. its really only you tbh.

10. theres nothing wrong with BTEC social health and care. You cna always build on it till you have enough to do a degree if you want or you can get some professional qualifications as well. Try and find out what your target os.


You said child nurse


You need a plan that is achievable. Just work out the steps you need to take and tick them off as you complete them. Nursing si a well respected career, so ignore the idots who pretend to look down on it. They are mental.

Start making plans and then strat making things happen. Be your own best friend and worry only about what you do.

https://nationalcareersservice.direct.gov.uk/advice/planning/jobprofiles/Pages/children'snurse.aspx

https://www.healthcareers.nhs.uk/explore-roles/nursing/childrens-nurse

https://www.prospects.ac.uk/job-profiles/paediatric-nurse
[QUOTE="999tigger;67219928"]
Original post by Anonymous


1. Life isnt a race. You will find many people make great plans then stuff happens and they crash out, so dont think everyone knows or will succeed in their life plan. Syop comparing and focus on you.

2. Self esteem can be dealt with by counseling/ therapy to stop comparing yourself plys focus or find out what you cna do. Voluntary work is a good start.

3. Socially awkward- we all have to learn.

4. Accept your height unless you are going for stilts. Your looks you cna learn to make more of plus working out can change your body shape for the better. Its also great for dealing with confidence and depression.

5. If you are in constant pity party then you will have trouble finding a man becayse nobody really wants someone who is depressed and miserbale, hence do the confidence boosting things above. Dont worry though its not attraction from men thats importnat its attraction from the right one. Confidence is a great attractor. Dont worry too much you have all your twenties and more to learn about dating.

6. You dont have to be amibitious except I think everyone should aspire to making themself happy. Use that as your focus.

7. Btec is fine, but you need good results, hence work hard.

8. You just sound a bit down, all teenagers go through it, take it slowly, dont beat up on yourself and make some changes as suggested above. ince you make small changes then it becomes easier and the outlook more positive. You just have to build and keep making progress.

9. Stop worrying about what people think or do and focus on what you think and do. You and maybe your parents are the only ones you might consider impressing. its really only you tbh.

10. theres nothing wrong with BTEC social health and care. You cna always build on it till you have enough to do a degree if you want or you can get some professional qualifications as well. Try and find out what your target os.


You said child nurse


You need a plan that is achievable. Just work out the steps you need to take and tick them off as you complete them. Nursing si a well respected career, so ignore the idots who pretend to look down on it. They are mental.

Start making plans and then strat making things happen. Be your own best friend and worry only about what you do.

https://nationalcareersservice.direct.gov.uk/advice/planning/jobprofiles/Pages/children'snurse.aspx

https://www.healthcareers.nhs.uk/explore-roles/nursing/childrens-nurse

https://www.prospects.ac.uk/job-profiles/paediatric-nurse



That is great advice

I feel a whole lot better.

I really appreciate it.:smile:
@tiger999


^^
Thanks.:smile:
@999tigger


i tagged the wrong person above.
Original post by Anonymous
I am an 18-year-old female; jobless(HOW DO I GET A JOB), lifeless, scared for the unknown and unmotivated.

I feel lonely in the sense that everybody i know seems to be moving on in life, be it that they are going to university in September or just have their life planned out.:frown:

I also have self-esteem issues which also impact me a lot.:redface:

I am socially awkward. I have next to no friends and i guess i am just depressed about life.

I don't like my height, i look 12, 13 at most, although it depends on what i am wearing mostly.

I just know if ANY man will take an interest in me.

Will i be lonely for ever?:frown:

I am not the most ambitious person.:frown: In fact i lack motivation most of the time.

I hated school, came out with bad grades and now do BTEC in the hope of being a child nurse one day.

I just feel like i am inadequate for everything really, from school to general life.

I sometimes feel jealous of my siblings(older and younger sister) a) they are smarter than me b)they excel academically more than me. They did not have to do BTEC.:redface:

I just don't want people looking down on me as a person.:frown:


I feel like my life is a mess and that i won't amount to anything.:redface:

Lots of people look down on BTEC and think nursing is a poor career to be in.

I know that it does not matter what people think as my self worth should come from my own happiness but its hard when people ask me what you study and i say "BTEC health and social care". It just makes it seem like you are not clever enough or that was the course you had to do.


I need help, how can i regain back my dignity?

Any advice??


Maybe get a book on self guided cognitive behavioural therapy, it'll teach you how to combat those negative thoughts more effectively and help with self esteem. Low self esteem is a sign of depression, so if you think your problem is more serious you could consider asking to have CBT on the NHS.

Your B-tec is a new chance to make friends. You'll all be the same boat and have the course in common.

Being a nurse is a fantastic career. My mum's a nurse, and I know I personally could not do it. Doctors may be the ones doing the diagnosis but when you're sick, nurses are the one's who look after you. I've been in hospital a lot and there are a lot of nurses I am grateful to, but I rarely remember the doctors who fly past the wards on their rounds.

One of my school friends ended up leaving after GSCE's and going back to college to do an access course to get onto nursing. Lots of people don't do well in school for a variety of reasons, but you're very young when you're at school - it's not how well you do at school that defines you for the rest of your life.

What do you do hobby wise?

Also as someone else has mentioned, volunteering/ charity work often gives you a bit of boost on the self-esteem front.

Two other simple things you can do
1. Write a list of what you like about yourself try and aim for at least three items and say them out loud. Add to this daily eventually you will have 20+ items on your list. For example 1. I like that I am a good friend, 2. I like that I can make a mean roast dinner 3. I like that I my hair has grown really long - as you can see none of these things involve around intelligence! If you start to doubt yourself 'maybe I'm not a good friend afterall' talk back to yourself 'yes I am because of the time that I helped x at y time by doing z.
2. Try and say thank you to someone or send an email a couple of times a week, being appreciated makes others feel good and in turn probably will make you feel good.

Academics aren't everything, one of friends dropped out of school after GSCE's and became a hairdresser and she's been happy, it's fufilling for her and she's great at it. I don't know what kind of nurse you'd be but generally jobs that involve helping people are very rewarding.

Also, about finding a man, don't rush yourself. There more baggage you have from past relationships the harder it is to stand up, grounded in a new one. I was worried about one of my sister's friend - she didn't have a boyfriend until she was 29, but now she's happily married. Once you've built on your self esteem, someone will notice you.
(edited 7 years ago)
What the hell?

Studying a B-TEC can get you far. Plus, some people who have studied a B-TEC end up achieving decent degree classifications in university.

I don't think a qualification should determine your intelligence.


Posted from TSR Mobile

Quick Reply

Latest