Upset about student housing
Hi,
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
You said you would be happy with any room and now you aren't. It is a bit unfair to your friends if you now complain about it.
Original post by asc01
Hi,
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation?
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I'm sure all your housemates are rational and reasonable human beings so if you can find a way to air your opinions then it's of course worth a try
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take
Well I was with you until you said you were happy with any room as thats exactly what you got. Its your error. Its not their problem you are living in a box room or that your mum and dad got divorced.
That said if you are unhappy, then you should address the issue now. because you have let it go, then that means someone else has to move into the room you dont like so you are happy and they become unhappy. You should have known the rooms were different and there would be an issue between who got which room.
Option 1 complain to them and force one of them to take the small room you dont wnat.- wont happen without some major resentment which will posion the atmosphere of the house and your friendship.
Option 2 leave and find somewhere else, but you will need to find another person to take your room and get LL's consent.
Option 3 Have a house meeting and ask them to reprice the rooms, so the larger ones pay mopre and the person who gets the smaller room pays less. You keep lowering the price of the room until someone takes it. The bidders agree to pay the balance of the rent between them. This would be an equitable solution. You could do this by auctioning the rooms off between you.
Unless they are very good friends, then I doubt they will listen to you, whcih might mean option 2 is your only choice. Option 1 is a bad deal, but option 3 has potential if they were willing to listen which i dont expect them to be. Its a situation you got yourself into and should have chosen a house with rooms all of a similar size or addressed the issue before the rooms were chosen. You could have drawn lost for instance.
That said if you are unhappy, then you should address the issue now. because you have let it go, then that means someone else has to move into the room you dont like so you are happy and they become unhappy. You should have known the rooms were different and there would be an issue between who got which room.
Option 1 complain to them and force one of them to take the small room you dont wnat.- wont happen without some major resentment which will posion the atmosphere of the house and your friendship.
Option 2 leave and find somewhere else, but you will need to find another person to take your room and get LL's consent.
Option 3 Have a house meeting and ask them to reprice the rooms, so the larger ones pay mopre and the person who gets the smaller room pays less. You keep lowering the price of the room until someone takes it. The bidders agree to pay the balance of the rent between them. This would be an equitable solution. You could do this by auctioning the rooms off between you.
Unless they are very good friends, then I doubt they will listen to you, whcih might mean option 2 is your only choice. Option 1 is a bad deal, but option 3 has potential if they were willing to listen which i dont expect them to be. Its a situation you got yourself into and should have chosen a house with rooms all of a similar size or addressed the issue before the rooms were chosen. You could have drawn lost for instance.
Thanks for the replies everyone I understand that it was my mistake saying I would be fine with any room and I'll just have to deal with it. However as I said in the title I had given a preference and I did actually suggest we draw numbers out at random but 2 people were against this idea.
Original post by asc01
Thanks for the replies everyone I understand that it was my mistake saying I would be fine with any room and I'll just have to deal with it. However as I said in the title I had given a preference and I did actually suggest we draw numbers out at random but 2 people were against this idea.
Well you didnt do anything about it. Poor planning and each day you say nothing will be taken that you go along with it. Its a put up or shut up situation.
Original post by asc01
Hi,
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation?
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
Ahhh mate, Feel for you. I know what you meant by saying you were happy with any room but that was to keep modest. That was an error. I was like that but some people don't give two ****s about your feelings and I am sure you are a nice person. I think if anything you should have been the first to move in, yes you were at work but you should have been the main key collector...or what they say as then 'Head Tenant'.
Some friends need a brick to hit them to be able to take hints...sounds a bit flaky to me because the room you told her you liked was the one she took. Nah don't take that, talk to however you want to swap with or make everyone move out of their rooms and discuss it. Sounds ridiculous as the last thing you would want is to have conflict but its better than them taking the mick and you sitting in your box room in silence. Stand your ground! by the sounds of what you have done for the housing it is totally your right!
Really sorry to hear you about your situation at home. I hope it gets better!
Original post by Kattah96
Ahhh mate, Feel for you. I know what you meant by saying you were happy with any room but that was to keep modest. That was an error. I was like that but some people don't give two ****s about your feelings and I am sure you are a nice person. I think if anything you should have been the first to move in, yes you were at work but you should have been the main key collector...or what they say as then 'Head Tenant'.
Some friends need a brick to hit them to be able to take hints...sounds a bit flaky to me because the room you told her you liked was the one she took. Nah don't take that, talk to however you want to swap with or make everyone move out of their rooms and discuss it. Sounds ridiculous as the last thing you would want is to have conflict but its better than them taking the mick and you sitting in your box room in silence. Stand your ground! by the sounds of what you have done for the housing it is totally your right!
Really sorry to hear you about your situation at home. I hope it gets better!
Some friends need a brick to hit them to be able to take hints...sounds a bit flaky to me because the room you told her you liked was the one she took. Nah don't take that, talk to however you want to swap with or make everyone move out of their rooms and discuss it. Sounds ridiculous as the last thing you would want is to have conflict but its better than them taking the mick and you sitting in your box room in silence. Stand your ground! by the sounds of what you have done for the housing it is totally your right!
Really sorry to hear you about your situation at home. I hope it gets better!
Thanks you so much for the nice reply it means a lot! I think I was just trying to please people and avoid arguments but im sure it'll be fine once ive moved my things in and made the space my own! Next time an situaion like this happens I'll just speak up for myself, but thank you again for the advice!x
Original post by asc01
Hi,
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation?
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I'm sure you'd have someone that doesn't need as much space and wouldn't mind swapping as you dont have enough space to fit things. I can understand that you aren't happy and ive had similar situations as you but ive learnt that saying 'it doesnt matter' or something in that sense doesn't work, next time just say which room you wanted. I do understand you dont want to seem greedy and want to be seen nice but if you actually have a preference then say it next time. good luck
At the end of the day, no-one in a bigger room will really be pleased to swap with you and have the smallest, so I think it's something you will just have to accept.
If you are so unhappy then do something about it and ask. Its ridiculous you end up being unhappy for all that time without at least raising the issue. If you did all the work then you do have a claim to having first pick( most people would have taken it) or negotiating different prices for the different rooms. People are always going to walk over you in life if you let them.
Actually the fact you suggested you draw lots and they objected was ridiculous because they knew they were going to be there and you werent. Lots was one way but the fairest was different prices for the rooms. You should push your case, because they didnt have any issue in taking advantage.
Actually the fact you suggested you draw lots and they objected was ridiculous because they knew they were going to be there and you werent. Lots was one way but the fairest was different prices for the rooms. You should push your case, because they didnt have any issue in taking advantage.
(edited 7 years ago)
I think you've screwed yourself over here. You allowed the rooms to be allocated without you there to start with, didn't insist on pulling lots at random (the fairest thing to do) and then said you would be okay with anything. It's no surprise you ended up with the worst room. Your home life has nothing to do with your uni room, everyone there will have to live in their room for 9 months of the year and pay for it so everyone is entitled to want a nice room and I don't think anyone has a better claim than anyone else. I also don't think organising it gives you much claim, you should have insisted on others helping if it was a problem - everyone will be paying for their rent so everyone has a pretty big stake in which room they have.
As for what to do now. You can either accept it or throw your toys out of the pram and try and insist it is done again - either by lots or by reallocating rents so some rooms are more/less expensive (this is a good idea to do anytime you have room variations - you usually have someone who wants a cheap room and will compromise to save money) - but my guess is that everyone will band against you now as they are happy with their rooms and don't want to end up with yours.
As for what to do now. You can either accept it or throw your toys out of the pram and try and insist it is done again - either by lots or by reallocating rents so some rooms are more/less expensive (this is a good idea to do anytime you have room variations - you usually have someone who wants a cheap room and will compromise to save money) - but my guess is that everyone will band against you now as they are happy with their rooms and don't want to end up with yours.
Original post by doodle_333
I think you've screwed yourself over here. You allowed the rooms to be allocated without you there to start with, didn't insist on pulling lots at random (the fairest thing to do) and then said you would be okay with anything. It's no surprise you ended up with the worst room. Your home life has nothing to do with your uni room, everyone there will have to live in their room for 9 months of the year and pay for it so everyone is entitled to want a nice room and I don't think anyone has a better claim than anyone else. I also don't think organising it gives you much claim, you should have insisted on others helping if it was a problem - everyone will be paying for their rent so everyone has a pretty big stake in which room they have.
As for what to do now. You can either accept it or throw your toys out of the pram and try and insist it is done again - either by lots or by reallocating rents so some rooms are more/less expensive (this is a good idea to do anytime you have room variations - you usually have someone who wants a cheap room and will compromise to save money) - but my guess is that everyone will band against you now as they are happy with their rooms and don't want to end up with yours.
As for what to do now. You can either accept it or throw your toys out of the pram and try and insist it is done again - either by lots or by reallocating rents so some rooms are more/less expensive (this is a good idea to do anytime you have room variations - you usually have someone who wants a cheap room and will compromise to save money) - but my guess is that everyone will band against you now as they are happy with their rooms and don't want to end up with yours.
As I said in a previous response obviously it was my fault im in this position for not pushing for a room I wanted and will just deal with the room. At the end of the day, no one is going to switch with me for a worse room and changing rent price is not an option
Original post by asc01
Thanks you so much for the nice reply it means a lot! I think I was just trying to please people and avoid arguments but im sure it'll be fine once ive moved my things in and made the space my own! Next time an situaion like this happens I'll just speak up for myself, but thank you again for the advice!x
No worries,
I hope you get what you rightfully deserve
Original post by asc01
As I said in a previous response obviously it was my fault im in this position for not pushing for a room I wanted and will just deal with the room. At the end of the day, no one is going to switch with me for a worse room and changing rent price is not an option
At least you know for next year !
Don't let people walk over you again, the fact they refused random draws means they were being completely selfish. Mean people
See if you can swap after a term or something? That seems fair to me, and make sure you pay less rent if your room is smaller.
Original post by asc01
Hi,
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation?
Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
I am upset about the bedroom my friends have allocated to me in our 2nd year house. Me and ONE other housemate went to the viewings and booked the house, no one else even viewed it prior to moving in. I also sorted out the all inclusive bills for everyone. My mam and dad are also separated and although I previously lived with my mother she is moving in with her partner to a smaller house where there will be no bedroom for me, and so I am living now with my father full-time in a bedroom which is basically a box with no window. I was obviously really excited to have my own space given the circumstances, which my best friend was aware of. Unfortunately, I was working the day everyone picked the rooms. I said I would be happy with any room (although I am now regretting this), however my best friend who was aware of the circumstance and hadn't viewed the house prior assured me I would have a nice room. This is not the case now, she even got the room I hinted that I liked and I am left with the smallest room in the house- which doesn't fit my furniture in properly! Am I overreacting about the situation or should I tell my housemates how upset I am about the situation
?Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading x
You do not mention whether you pay different rents which would be the obvious solution to this problem even if you agreed you would pay the same originally. Most people would rather agree that paying more for a larger room is fairer and less hassle than switching.
Original post by I_Hate_Usernames
See if you can swap after a term or something? That seems fair to me, and make sure you pay less rent if your room is smaller.
I think this is a good idea and you could push this through.
You really need to stand your ground though and call a house meeting to put this forward. If they wont even consider it, then it shows you what sort of friends they are as they are quite happy to take advantage. They were quite unreasonable not to take a random draw or settle for an equitable way of dealing with distribution of rooms. You have to stick up for yourself.
From where you are and avoiding this in future you should have alid down the rules/ claim at the beginning.
Learn the lesson that people are selfish, so pre planning prevents them from being so.
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