How are you feeling right now? MKIII

I don't know how to wear my hair tomorrow!!!!!!! Fringe out or clipped back? Braids? Hair down with a hairband? Hair down with a knot on top? Fishtail plait? Crown braids? Daenerys braids?

Oh god.

yh XD lol fair point there
:I I don't think so :Iyeah
nope - I went on the muddy lawn with only my socks on Smart move. I am aware. Thinking is not my speciality.
Doesn't help that I got <4.5 hours of sleep last night :/
I don't have any of those nearby :I

idk

im trying to be alright but idk it is strange.

i feel like i live in an alternative dimension and am watching everyone from behind glass, they are close but i cant relate to them and they arent close and dont really care tbh.

i like sleeping tho so that is something, plus if i sleep for 57 minute intervals then there are no dreams

might sleep some more

Well it is the weekend so I'm super happy for no work. No more waking up at 6am for 2 days
And more TSR

Went on the muddy lawn with socks on huh...that is strange dont know what happened then

How many of hours of sleep did you get last night? I always get at least 7, trying to get 8 atm

Went on the muddy lawn with socks on huh...that is strange dont know what happened then

How many of hours of sleep did you get last night? I always get at least 7, trying to get 8 atm
the bold bit is true, I find that with ppl like that, maybe you're just wrong for them, or they're just wrong for you



More rep too? you MUST be close to 11 now

yh lol u dont wanna know it was ok in the end - apparently everyone forgot? I still have a nasty bruise on my wrist though
it really hurt whilst playing the violin this morning :I

<5 hours

Still a way to go About halfway there

Yay at least everyone forgot right?

ah I can imagine that would hurt, is it a proper dark purple/black bruise-did you apply ice asap yesterday?

same here, Ill race you mate, let the great asian race begin....how many does ihatepe have? 11?

Really absolutely ****!

a bit lazy
a bit unmotivated
but at the same time i wanna do stuff
homesick
frustrated
and desperate

Sick ill ive wanted to do is be sick all day and thw feeling wont go

yh lol
nah its one of those internal green ones
ouchies
cba with ice lol

He's on 10 but he's way ahead of us

I guess I can say the things I wouldn't tell people in real life...(I wouldn't talk to friends/family about my feelings)

I'm the sort of person who you'd think of as the happiest and most confident person. And at times I am happy, when I'm laughing with friends and I can distract myself from the emptiness I feel inside. But the darkness always comes flooding in again and then it's all I can see and focus on. The world becomes grey – devoid of feeling and enjoyment. I'm not sad. There's an absence of joy.
I am disgusted by myself. This self-disgust makes me want to rip my face off in anger – why am I so disgusting? So in this state I retreat as I cannot bare to be around people. I think too much, it's a curse. I think so much it drives me mad. The problem is that sometimes I get tired of living in this rut...
Alas I continue; I struggle through this wretched existence for one day it will end.

That's how I'm feeling right now.

What stuff do you want to do? go out?

Whats up? I hope things get better



What stuff do you want to do? go out?



Ah thats sad to hear what are you sick with?



ice helps a lot tho

oh well, internal huh...any chance of joint/bone dmg? you should get it checked if its srs

omg i didn't think someone'd answer this lol
well i got some (a lot of) work to do
i gotta find a job
i gotta study some (a lot of) stuff
i gotta finish reading a novel
i gotta write my personal statement
etc etc=))
i'm just sick of always having dozens of tasks to do and yeah i guess i'm already ranting too much lol

Nah but we have a bro union and we got more time to waste lets overtake him



The bit in bold, I think everyone is like that to an extent, you really aren't alone at all

Everyone yearns for stuff, a partner, better academics, better physicals, the loss of someone and distracting is the way to go I guess

My advice is to pinpoint where the self disgust comes from? is it school, work, some ppl? or past ppl?

also with the joy bit, it is hard, but some lucky ppl find their passion, whether its a sport/art/something else....I found mine in bboying


so try a ton of stuff and find something that makes you feel truly happy and then you will much better for starters!

ofc someone would, unless you didnt want someone to ?

yep I got a massive bio test and an impossible maths hwk
yep I dont have a job either atm
yep study is everywhere for a2 lvls next yr!
no novel for me tho
and Ive pretty much got my PS done

Mmm I can see that you're pretty sick, why not just make a small aim for each day?

like 1 paragraph of your statement/one chapter of the novel/45mins job searching?

Whats up? I hope things get better

Depression has kicked in again
Thanks man! Appreciated!