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What kind of Mental illness is this and what do you think i should do?

I have always had an ASD type disability which makes me retarded and for the past year it has gotten worse. It has caused my relationships with people to think i'm perhaps mentally ill (which is true tbh) hence a lack of friend. Several examples include:

1. One of my manager last year, when i was leaving the workplace, said i had an inward leadership with poor communication. I ended up crying on the way home.

2. My now ex female friend (who i even fancied badly) said to me in the uni library how 'i'm so antisocial and moody', indirecting me i'm an autistic (though not saying the word)

3. My work colleague reported to me that i am seen as 'distant'.

4. A job i did two years ago for a fundraising company, the manager bullied me and said 'i was the biggest weirdo ever to set foot here' and said 'i can't read you and i only hired to see you break'

The biggest one was this weekend, I was going back to uni and my dad is never at home, now me and father have had a 10 year feud albeit we still talk to each other. The argument is i'm seen as a weird son and he hates me because i'm a ****ing loser and weirdo (same as my mum)

My dad basically didn't know i was going back and he started saying 'oh i'm not in your life' and going on to say 'i just don't understand you'. My family mocked me and this isn't the first time it has happened, the same incident happened again two months with my dad even saying 'you lack social skills and you're not changing'

Spoiler

These don't seem like insults but they are to me and now i'm losing it by drinking more (something that i started it when i went uni l last year). I know this a mental condition such as Autism or a personality disorder but it has to end. The quietness has to stop. It's these issues which is making me not going to attend any lectures this year. I need an answer hence why i want to voluntarily section myself or something :s-smilie:

Spoiler

(edited 7 years ago)
Reply 1
What kind? None you're probably just a moody git im afraid...
Original post by Napp
What kind? None you're probably just a moody git im afraid...


lol
Nobody can diagnose you over the Internet. It could just be your personality, it doesn't necessarily mean you have a mental illness
Original post by A-LJLB
Nobody can diagnose you over the Internet. It could just be your personality, it doesn't necessarily mean you have a mental illness


yeah true. i'm still new on here.

It's just that my personality is making me ill. sigh, i'll just go to the hospital tbh.
It could be a personality disorder, or social anxiety, or a combination of both. As the person above said, nobody can diagnose you over the internet; it might be worth seeing your GP or self referring to a mental health team near where you live? That being said, you can't (and shouldn't) try and change your fundamental personality! The fact that people have been horrible to you doesn't mean that you should be the one to change; it's their problem, not yours. Maybe you could look online/ in your local area, and see if there is a community for people with similar personalities/ who face similar issues, so that you can "find your people", so to speak. **** people who don't make an effort, and find people who make you happy/ you enjoy spending time with!
Original post by Quiet Benin
yeah true. i'm still new on here.

It's just that my personality is making me ill. sigh, i'll just go to the hospital tbh.


The hospital isn't the place to go, they won't be able to help?
Original post by Quiet Benin
yeah true. i'm still new on here.

It's just that my personality is making me ill. sigh, i'll just go to the hospital tbh.


Why do you want to go to the hospital? Other than the remarks from these people, how do you feel in general? Explain more why it is you think you are ill. All I see so far is that some people have criticised you for being distant.
Original post by SophiaNeuning
Why do you want to go to the hospital? Other than the remarks from these people, how do you feel in general? Explain more why it is you think you are ill. All I see so far is that some people have criticised you for being distant.


The criticism of being distant has made me feel mentally exhausted. I try to be friendly but no one sees this. (i think what happens is that people see me friendly, then in a few weeks, they think 'this guy, is such a weirdo').

It's either seclusion at a hospital to get better as i have gone through many types of help which has not worked. The other option is what everyone thinks i do - be a recluse.
Original post by Quiet Benin
The criticism of being distant has made me feel mentally exhausted. I try to be friendly but no one sees this. (i think what happens is that people see me friendly, then in a few weeks, they think 'this guy, is such a weirdo':wink:.

It's either seclusion at a hospital to get better as i have gone through many types of help which has not worked. The other option is what everyone thinks i do - be a recluse.


Oky. It seems to me (and it goes without saying that I know absolutely nothing) that you aren't mentally well (as in depression or something similar). But not unwell in the way that you think you are. You think everyone wants you to be a recluse and you think everyone sees you as some freak. This is highly unlikely. I don't doubt that you've had some bad encounters with people, and your family situation doesn't sound good, but you seem to have taken these opinions of others to such an extreme that you believe you must be mentally ill for them to have such an opinion of you. Why does the opinion of some people mean you have to become a recluse? Why does it mean you are mentally ill? When people criticise your communication what exactly are they criticising?

Edit: I quickly snooped through your previous threads and saw one where you're thinking of dropping out of uni, can I ask what support there is for disability at that uni? Surely there is a group you can join with others who are facing similar struggles. And keep going with church, you'll make friends there. There are loads of people who struggle with the exact same things you do, you just need to find the right people to hang out with, people who will get you. I do not doubt for one second that the are others in your uni with the same social issues. You do not need to be a recluse or seclude yourself .
(edited 7 years ago)
A lot going on here. First, it's OK to have ASD. It happens.

There are also ways of getting help for it so the most troublesome symptoms don't end up running your life. Certain kinds of social understanding can be taught. Others may just involve knowing when to call a time-out and get away from whatever is bothering you.

There are also personality types that have nothing to do with autism per se, that may require some down-time between social interactions. Ther are lots of introverts everywhere, and there's no harm in knowing that you are one and don't want to be over-stimulated. You can take breaks and then talk with friends and family.

FWIW, I am fairly introverted, and I have a son on the autism spectrum. While he's different from me in many ways, it sometimes seems that many of my traits which are simple idiosyncrasies (albeit irritating ones to my wife) were magnified in him to the point that they are disabilities. His schools have been good at getting him to recognize when he's having a tough day, and to learn to ask for what he needs. Sometimes that means not going on family day-trips, or seeking a little private time at the end of the day.
Further thoughts:

Frankly, for your family to be giving you grief about this seems inexplicably cruel. This is part of who you are, and not being easy to read or not being anxious to join them for loud parties is not too different from being unable to go on long hikes if you have a broken leg or spina bifida. They need to cool out. Same with your boss, although he has a few more excuses to be stupid, not having grown up around you.

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